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Original poster

I don't care what issues your kid has you still need to parent them

457 replies

Differentstarts · 21/08/2024 19:17

I'm fuming just had a massive argument with my now ex friend because she won't parent her kid. I don't care if your kid is ND, NT or identifies as a tablecloth you still need to parent them. I was at my friends this afternoon with my kids 7 and 4 and her kids 9 and 5. Our eldest kids where sat together nicely watching a film and youngest 2 where playing. Her 5 year old suddenly decides she wants to watch telly and picks the remote control up and changes the channel. My friends response was to the eldest 2 just let her otherwise she will kick off you can watch the rest later. Her eldest just accepted this he's clearly use to it. However I'm not accepting that so I took the remote and put the film back on so with that screaming and tears
Her eldest was agreeing with his mum and saying it's OK I don't mind Which was also annoying me. Then my friend started having a go at me how iv upset her daughter and how the kids didn't even mind watching it later. I struggle with anger issues so at this point I'm losing my shit at her (I know I shouldn't have) and I got my kids and left. I'm still fuming. I know I should of just left straight away but come on what is wrong with people

Yabu. If the eldest 2 where happy to watch it later you should of gone along with it
Yanbu she needs to discipline her daughter

OP posts:
SweetBirdsong · 21/08/2024 19:42

Major apology from me to everyone on here for quoting the OP. Didn't mean to sorry! Blush

Ooops!

.

NowImNotDoingIt · 21/08/2024 19:42

Pot , kettle ,black.

You behaved like a right dick, but ohhh you have table issues , sorry anger issues. So that's ok.

You behaved worse than any person f the children. Should we blame your parenting too?

Didn't anyone teach you that when you go to someone's house you respect their rules? That what you think and want isn't the most important thing?

No idea if the youngest is a spoilt brat or not, but you definitely are.

Original poster
Differentstarts · 21/08/2024 19:42

EmmaGrundyForPM · 21/08/2024 19:41

So it's not OK for her to give in to her 5 year old having a temper tantrum but it's OK for you, as an adult, to have "anger issues".

Right.......

I never said it was ok for me to lose my shit

OP posts:
SweetBirdsong · 21/08/2024 19:41

Differentstarts · 21/08/2024 19:17

I'm fuming just had a massive argument with my now ex friend because she won't parent her kid. I don't care if your kid is ND, NT or identifies as a tablecloth you still need to parent them. I was at my friends this afternoon with my kids 7 and 4 and her kids 9 and 5. Our eldest kids where sat together nicely watching a film and youngest 2 where playing. Her 5 year old suddenly decides she wants to watch telly and picks the remote control up and changes the channel. My friends response was to the eldest 2 just let her otherwise she will kick off you can watch the rest later. Her eldest just accepted this he's clearly use to it. However I'm not accepting that so I took the remote and put the film back on so with that screaming and tears
Her eldest was agreeing with his mum and saying it's OK I don't mind Which was also annoying me. Then my friend started having a go at me how iv upset her daughter and how the kids didn't even mind watching it later. I struggle with anger issues so at this point I'm losing my shit at her (I know I shouldn't have) and I got my kids and left. I'm still fuming. I know I should of just left straight away but come on what is wrong with people

Yabu. If the eldest 2 where happy to watch it later you should of gone along with it
Yanbu she needs to discipline her daughter

This thread will not go well @Differentstarts

qwertyasdfgzxcv · 21/08/2024 19:41

To an extent I agree with you but you were a guest in her house, you don't do that!

femfemlicious · 21/08/2024 19:41

WOW!. you are really horrible. Why create a scene in her house. Why not just LEAVE!. You need to work on your "anger issues "

Otherstories2002 · 21/08/2024 19:41

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They they aren’t your friends and this is the right outcome. You clearly think she’s shit and she’s clearly not keen on you. Friendship done.

Walkaround · 21/08/2024 19:41

Anotherparkingthread · 21/08/2024 19:38

You will find lots of people derailing the thread because they see it as a personal attack since they also have no idea how to say no to their mini dictator 🙄

Honestly I hate this style of parent because it does not prepare the kid for the real world where their wants won't be met. It sets them up for a shitty adulthood because over a certain age no matter who you are you aren't special. Not the kids fault and she will have a miserable life because of it.

Luckily you can just walk away and let this issue resolve itself lol

I have autism and wasn't catered to as a kid and guess what, I didn't die and my family didn't evaporate because I didn't get my own way.

At least the friend knows how to say no to the maxi dictator 🤣.

ArseInTheCoOpWindow · 21/08/2024 19:41

I wouldn’t care to be friends with anyone who has ‘anger issues’

l have an ND child. If you behaved like that in my house that would be the end of the friendship. But mainly because of the anger issues. You sound very hard work, and l really couldn’t be bothered.

Who exactly is the child here?

EmmaGrundyForPM · 21/08/2024 19:41

So it's not OK for her to give in to her 5 year old having a temper tantrum but it's OK for you, as an adult, to have "anger issues".

Right.......

Nowordsformethanks · 21/08/2024 19:40

I struggle with anger issues so at this point I'm losing my shit at her (I know I shouldn't have)

YABU. You sound similar to the kid what with your own tantrums and anger issues. You made it worse than it should have been.

On the other hand, YANBU I also agree with teaching kids they don't control everything and everyone. Leaving with your kids is fine.

Original poster
Differentstarts · 21/08/2024 19:40

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I have no issue with her daughter I have an issue with her not only for not parenting but for allowing her 5 year old to stop her child and my child from watching a film

OP posts:
Anotherparkingthread · 21/08/2024 19:38

You will find lots of people derailing the thread because they see it as a personal attack since they also have no idea how to say no to their mini dictator 🙄

Honestly I hate this style of parent because it does not prepare the kid for the real world where their wants won't be met. It sets them up for a shitty adulthood because over a certain age no matter who you are you aren't special. Not the kids fault and she will have a miserable life because of it.

Luckily you can just walk away and let this issue resolve itself lol

I have autism and wasn't catered to as a kid and guess what, I didn't die and my family didn't evaporate because I didn't get my own way.

FixTheBone · 21/08/2024 19:37

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Putting · 21/08/2024 19:37

Hobnobswantshernameback · 21/08/2024 19:36

Ooh we haven't had a goady ablest thread for aaages
oh wait

I know! Must be at least 2 minutes since the last one…

Hobnobswantshernameback · 21/08/2024 19:36

Ooh we haven't had a goady ablest thread for aaages
oh wait

HamAlive · 21/08/2024 19:36

So your friend needs to parent her 5yo child better so that the child doesn't keep kicking off when she doesn't get her own way. And yet it's totally fine for you, a grown adult, to kick off. Were you not parented properly? Sounds like you need help for your anger issues?

I agree that children should not be spoilt but there could have been many reasons why your friend didn't want to pick that battle at that moment, and I wouldn't treat a friend like you did, I'd probably give them the benefit of the doubt. Your reaction was worse than your friend not being firm with her DD.

Walkaround · 21/08/2024 19:35

Well, you behaved in a remarkably similar way to the 5-year old to whom you objected, didn’t you? Is this why you object so much to your friend’s parenting - because you know what sort of an adult her child will end up like if her intense desire to get her own way isn’t nipped in the bud now? 🤣

XChrome · 21/08/2024 19:35

financialcareerstuff · 21/08/2024 19:23

lol - why are you making this about ND? There is no mention of the daughter being ND in the story.

Ironically, you are, however, seeking to excuse YOU throwing a strop by saying you have anger issues!!??

So basically you and a five year old both threw a strop. And you are pissed at the five year old.... Grin

"I don't care if your kid is ND, NT or identifies as a tablecloth you still need to parent them."

This is a strong implication the kid is ND. She has since said the mom believes the child is ND.

Agree with you about the OP's temper tantrum. The hypocrisy of her lecturing a mom about a five year old having a tantrum is bizarre.

CLola24 · 21/08/2024 19:34

The fact that you think the friendship is over on your terms 😂

MissUltraViolet · 21/08/2024 19:33

You're being all judgy about your friends lack of parenting and her child being a 'brat' yet the child sounds like you - but she is 5 and you're an adult.

Maybe she is really struggling with her daughter, diagnosis or not? Maybe she is really stressed and in that moment, with guests, didn't want the embarassment of a meltdown?

If you had taken the remote from my daughter, in my home, then 'lost your shit' you'd get dragged out.

PolePrince55 · 21/08/2024 19:32

You should have took your kids and left to watch the rest of it at home
YABU to dictate what you friend and her kids watch in their own homes & how she parents her children.

sunsetsandboardwalks · 21/08/2024 19:32

You behaved just as badly as the 5yo you're bitching about.

She's a child - what's your excuse?

Spotlightt · 21/08/2024 19:31

You sound like an angry bastard, there's absolutely no need for your tone. Yeah the kid was in the wrong, but know your boundaries when in someone else's home and don't be such a crank.

WaitingForMojo · 21/08/2024 19:31

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Not having a formal diagnosis doesn’t make someone neurotypical. You’re really not coming off well in this

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