To be annoyed with DP over cancelled holiday

The overreaction is depressing. People make mistakes.

The key difference is you did it ONCE. OPs DP is apparently often useful with practical things and organisation. She frequently has to remind him. This is exhausting and unfair between 2 adults.

I find that so depressing..............

Ignore the people calling your DH a kno . I did this once and we rebooked. I had just forgot about an important thing I had coming up. Obviously if I had posted on Mumsnet, everyone would be telling my DH to leave me over a mistake. Actually, I doubt they would’ve…

If you DO have a child with him you know it will just get worse don't you?
If he is able not to fuck up at work he is able not to fuck up at home

He's really hopeless with practical matters and I kind of have to organise everything/remind him of stuff.

This will infuriate you if you have a baby.

Right...to you.

What if it's really important to your boss who has the ability to promote you or not, boost your career or not?

He seriously needs to step up and get better with 'practical matters'and organisation. It can be learnt.

I have 2 DSes with ADHD and dyspraxia. Both have huge problems with executive function. But I am not accepting that. I am teaching them (they are 10 and 12). I refuse to send 2 young men into the world who can't organise themselves. Its not easy for them, I accept that. They need tools so I am teaching them.

There are many posts on here from women who are disorganized ASKING FOR HELP. What has your DP done to improve himself?

Calendar incompetence😂

As in he can't read/understand them?

So did he misread or not check?

Aww, his got his 2 mummies to arrange everything because he's a very, very important little man and can't do it himself.

If you do go either alone or with a friend or the best option someone suggested, going and have him join you after his work commitment, it might focus his brain on paying attention to all his commitments.

If he misses out on the trip he will know that you aren’t going to continue to allow his incompetence spoil things for you. If he as to organise himself to follow on he might appreciate the work that goes into organising trips.

The thing is he isn’t really incompetent with scheduling or he’d be messing up work commitments too. He just can’t be arsed to be as competent when it comes to you.

I’d be a lot more pissed off about that. If that’s going to continue would he at least give you access to his work calendar so you can check it for him before you make any plans. But when does that become you being his secretary/ mummy?

And you really want him as your other parent to your child/ren?

There’s no such thing as an important team building exercise.

I'm surprised she's not there already. It's so unattractive in grown men.

Oh stop @MonsteraMama and think about life in the real world for a minute 🙄

I would go on my own. I don’t see why you should lose out because of his fuck up.

If he wants to join you, he can arrange that.

If you continue to mop up after this man child, there will come a point where you get the ick.

You know full well life is just not like that.

Well then it's up to him if he wants to prioritise his idiot boss over his partner isn't it? At least she knows where in the hierarchy she stands 🙄

It really doesn't matter if it's team building or something like fixing the quarterly budget. If the company decides that your presence is required, and you haven't already got holiday booked then it is fair enough that the company insists on that.

Where i work we are fully hybrid, and except for two or three events per year our presence - in person - is not required. Although there are compulsory meetings that you can dial into.

Their business, their rules.

Well yes obviously that's objectively true, but a lot of leaders turn it into something vital, and don't take kindly to people who don't agree.

My guess is that he didn't book the holiday out at work, and the team building day has been booked around people's available dates. Now he's faced with saying to work he can't go, and he might be worried the holiday wouldn't be authorised.

If he genuinely is like this at work and home then he needs to work on his executive function. I doubt he is much like this at work as he likely feels there is more consequence to messing up there, whereas if he messes up at home it 'only' affects you and to some extent your child.

We have a big wall calendar and any 'big' work things like team days etc go on there alongside personal things. If someone forgets to put something on it, they sort out any resulting problems.

Go on the holiday and he can follow or not as he prefers.

Surely he arranged a later flight to join you, at his own expense since he made the cock up?

Change his flight for the Friday, go on your own on the Thursday and book a spa treatment and saunter round a lovely gallery and have a great lunch people watching, then let him join you for the rest of the break. Or sit by the pool and read a book, don't know where you are going but It could be lovely

I’d g with a friend, assuming you’d been looking forward to it, and then he can book a uk trip for you both for another time. Do not take on all the admin of fixing his mistake though.

Never in the history of mankind has a team building exercise been important enough it can't be missed. They're always, always corporate box ticking bullshit.

So just to be clear on that. This isn't an absolutely vital, unavoidable meeting with the CEO to discuss the progression of his career. It's a playdate for adults that he's choosing over a holiday with you after a difficult year.

Aye he sounds dead nice.