Kirstie Allsop's 15 Year Old Son

I was reading this thinking 15 is a bit young, then remembered I went to Brittany to meet my French pen friend just after O levels in 1981. Travelled on the ferry and got a train in France toute seule!

So youth hostels aren’t in fact youth hostels. That’s a great pity. Structural cotton-wooling.

We’ve deffo had to do some phoning, but have always been able to sort it without too much bother. Also in the Uk

They can in many, though not usually in the dorm room

most kids left school at 14 and were considered adults in my grandparents generation around WW1 period, around 100 years ago.

More recently than that. The school leaving age didn't go up to 15 until 1947 (I think. Late 1940s, anyway. And 16 in the 1970s.) But young people weren't legally adults until they were 21.

We did a long cycling trip, staying in youth hostels in the 80s after O Levels. It was common.

But it says that her son is 15, how is this even possible?
I'm not sure. She says the friend was 16.
I haven't read the article. Did she say where he was staying.
I know when my lad was away his 17th birthday was in the middle of his trip and he had to research hostels that would allow him and his friends and he booked them in advance to make sure he got somewhere to stay.

I think kids are wrapped in cotton wool . I think it's got worse since lockdown.

Not at 15 but my DC went inter railing at 17 and had no problem booking hostels, there are plenty (including youth hostels in the UK) that allow 16 + to book. The tweet here says her DS needed to be with a 16 year old to make it work. I'm in Scotland, although increasingly rare, some 16 year olds do go off to Uni and manage perfectly fine, very common to be under 18 when first leaving home to get that uni experience - which although not travelling comes with a lot of the dangers expressed here that people are trying to protect their DC from.

Both of mine walked to school alone from mid primary.
By start of secondary they would get train or bus into local town with friends for shopping, skatepark, cycling etc.
Both of mine travelled the UK to see family from around age 13/14 on trains and buses.
At age 15/16 they were both on DofE expeds which had significant unsupervised times, and also both did a few days wandering in the mountains themselves alone or with a friend
One of mine went to the Alps for 4 weeks at age 16 and rented a place between him and 5 friends, all under 17. Repeated the next summer at age 17.
The next year at age 18 he had built a camper van in lock down so went driving to Italy and spent 9 weeks daundering back, joined by his 16 year old brother for a few weeks.
At one week past his 18th birthday my youngest disappeared to Japan and NZ for a year out - alone.

It is all about both the individual child's capabilities and resilience, and about how you support them to learn to make good judgments, with a healthy dose of progression and trust in them.

On the other hand, if you always drive them everywhere, they have only ever taken part in organised sessions led by adults for all after school activities, if they have never caught a train or bus, or had to figure out anything for themselves (see a lot of young people today), then no they are not prepared and ready for life and such adventures. Cotton wool does not prepare kids for life.

But it says that her son is 15, how is this even possible?

I'm sure there are plenty of 15-16 year olds in worse situations. I was homeless a few weeks after my 16th, ended up living in a drug dealers flat. And it's only a few generations before who left school and went to work at 15. So no I can't get worked up about a mother, who clearly loves her child, letting her child go travelling
I absolutely agree with this.
I work with teens who have been kicked out of the family home, ha e suffered serious neglect for years before social services got involved, have been groomed and moved from city to city or sensually abused by their own parent.
Going g on an trip like his would be a doddle and he would only be a phone call away from support.
I presume that he is reasonably well travelled to begin with so would know about checking in procedures, how to use an airport and train station and know how to take reasonable precautions. I know mine did that's why I had confidence in them travelling young.

It really does beggar belief! So yes fair play to KA because at the very least, her child is gaining some independence which is more than can be said for a lot of adults these days!

I'm sure there are plenty of 15-16 year olds in worse situations. I was homeless a few weeks after my 16th, ended up living in a drug dealers flat. And it's only a few generations before who left school and went to work at 15. So no I can't get worked up about a mother, who clearly loves her child, letting her child go travelling.

Kirsty is so no-nonsense in that typical upper class way I’m surprised she didn’t let him go solo at 10 yrs old. Lol

@Starlight1979 I doubt my parents knew what course I was studying at University never mind when papers were due in or when exams were happening.

I've advised a couple of parents to get their young adult child to email their tutor or go into their department admin department or make a phone call themselves but it falls on deaf ears.

Oh yes - I’m sure all univ heads of department and many staff in general know this. One mother wanted to discuss why her son had failed his dissertation, telling me he didn’t know. I knew very well he knew as I’d told him.

She admitted he had a job, was getting a mortgage and getting married. But she was ringing up his uni HoD to try to discuss his work.

I’ve been harangued by parents demanding to know their DCs’ attendance record or grades. I’ve been reminded that they are making a significant financial contribution. Many parents don’t see uni as different to school, clearly. I’ve had to remind them that it is their right to withdraw financial support if they have concerns - but their child is legally an adult. That seems to be a strange concept to some parents.

That's clever of him because you can't stay in a European hostel if you are under 18 unless accompanied by someone who is
There are international hostels that allow over 16s to stay there. They usually need a letter of consent from parents and they are not allowed in the bar area. From what I recall they have to have a so room.
I agree that many are for over 18s but in Krakow, Prague, Bucharest, Paris and Budapest you can find hostels that allow 16 to 18 year old with out needing an over 18 year old with them.

She will indeed say this. She likes to say a lot, but I bet you what she does in practice is very very different.

Pithy and on point to some. Opinions innit?

I think it's great that they allowed him to do it. Character building.

Yes, from what the person who knows her tells me, it sounds like that (but the person I know who knows her says she was never patronising to her).

And good for her. At 18 I was dropped off at the coach station with my cases by my mum. I got down to London, got on the boat train, found the right train at Calais, and went to the Alps for a year to work. I probably made my own ham sandwich though …

My parents thought nothing of it. We were expected to be able to live and work abroad -we were staying with employers so not having to find accommodation. Three years later DB went even further afield on his own at 18.

I'm sure she is checking in with him. My son is a similar age and he is quite a confident traveller, good at making plans, working out what to do etc. Friends the same age don't seem to have a clue what they are doing. It depends on the child.

This is so sad. But, as an employer, we've had people in their 20s start working for us and then their parents will ring in sick for them. Or they will ring with questions about their contract or working hours. We have to say we can only discuss their personnel details with the employee themselves and they hate it. It's very strange!

Some parents behave like spirit possessions, literally getting inside the body of their children to take over their lives.

Some teens definitely need to get an exorcist

Especially if at 18 they are still being controlled by their parents, they need to be able to make their own choices without bias