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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To suggest a male curfew one night a week

786 replies

twojumps · 19/08/2024 17:41

when women can walk free in the streets without fear?

Yes, violence still happens in homes and behind closed doors but what a powerful message it would send.

I'd say every night but let's start with one.

OP posts:
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FreedomDogs · 19/08/2024 18:19

twojumps · 19/08/2024 18:14

I think many men would champion women having a safe evening to themselves

Until their house burns down and the fire service is working at (less than) half their workforce, or they have a heart attack but they have to wait for an all-female team of paramedics to be free to come out to them, or they witness a crime but only WPCs are allowed on the streets so good luck waiting for them to get to you. Or even, let's be real, until they want to order a pizza but Domino's has one woman on shift trying to cover the entire city.

MillyMollyMandHey · 19/08/2024 18:19

Would transwomen be allowed out?

twojumps · 19/08/2024 18:19

@JabbaTheBeachHut

Give me your suggestions then? How do we reduce or end male violence?

OP posts:
cathcath2 · 19/08/2024 18:19

YABU, because guess who doesn't obey laws? Criminals. So all the decent men would be inside and all the low life not obeying it would be taking up huge amounts of police time and resources (I assume you'd give our emergency services permission to be out).

ilovemoney · 19/08/2024 18:18

Its an interesting idea. I would be in favor of looking at expanding women only places and spaces and times for example Gym and swim sessions, schools, wards and a host of other things for the safety and wellbeing of women and girls.

Feelingleftoutagain · 19/08/2024 18:18

As a mother of two sons who have been bought up to value and cherish women, I find this a ridiculous idea, raising our males to value and cherish is the only way forward

Frowningprovidence · 19/08/2024 18:17

It would backfire as women out on other nights would be seen as asking for it. It would end up with 'well you did go for a walk when men were out so what can you expecr'

JabbaTheBeachHut · 19/08/2024 18:17

twojumps · 19/08/2024 18:12

I'm not saying my suggestion is perfect but it's at least trying to make all women's lives better.

I started a thread recently asking if you've ever called the police and why. It was 99% for male violence in the street.

Honestly, something has to change. Women have to be made safer.

I'm not saying my suggestion is perfect

Good because 'batshit', 'ridiculous', 'unworkable', 'stupid' would be far better words 🤣

JLou08 · 19/08/2024 18:17

So if a single dad needs to take a child to A&E he can't, if his teen is missing or out drunk and vulnerable he can't do anything?
Women have to do all the night shifts that night? There would be quite a shortage of taxi drivers and staff at the garage. Would men be able to go out if they needed urgent treatment themselves?
There is some risk to women from men in public but the amount of attacks from unknown men in public is fairly low. No one should be living in so much fear that they don't feel safe walking the streets and want men to have a curfew so that they can feel safe. I don't have the stats and happy to be corrected with them but I suspect your more likely to be injured or killed in an RTA rather than at the hands of an unknown man in public.
If you want to do something to make women safer focus on addressing domestic abuse because it's women in these situations who are at significant risk.

twojumps · 19/08/2024 18:17

Notwhatuwanttohear · 19/08/2024 18:13

So you ban males for one night.

All the law abiding males stay indoors no male police or security guards.

All the criminals rapists pedophiles domestic abusers have free reign for one night as who is going to stop them?

We kept curfew for Covid. Cant we do it for women?

What do you suggest to tackle ongoing male violence?

OP posts:
SemperIdem · 19/08/2024 18:17

This would have the same sort of problems as dog licensing. The law abiding will abide, the lawless won’t. Precisely zero problems solved.

Male on women violence is an absolutely enormous problem, op you are right that many men might support your suggestion. These men aren’t the problem though.

bingobanjo · 19/08/2024 18:17

All those saying it’s unfair to punish all men for the actions of a few… you understand that all women are aleeway effectively under curfew every night, because of the few men?

I haven’t been outside alone at night since I was a teenager (presuming myself invincible)

SallyWD · 19/08/2024 18:17

BargingOnBy · 19/08/2024 18:16

Not a realistic idea OP but OMG how wonderful it would be. I’d go for a long walk in the countryside by myself. That would be bliss not to be scared of what could happen

I do this all the time anyway. Not all of us live in fear. I'm sorry if you do.

Alucard55 · 19/08/2024 18:16

Not sure if this has been mentioned but you would have "Brenda" out walking the streets as he is a real woman. It's unworkable. As Helen Joyce says, once men enter female only spaces they cease to be female only spaces.

suburberphobe · 19/08/2024 18:16

"As the mother of a son I find this highly offensive and entirely unreasonable to suggest that all men are violent criminals."

I agree.

Mumsnet is batshit sometimes.

BargingOnBy · 19/08/2024 18:16

Not a realistic idea OP but OMG how wonderful it would be. I’d go for a long walk in the countryside by myself. That would be bliss not to be scared of what could happen

Plzdontaskmyname · 19/08/2024 18:15

Notwhatuwanttohear · 19/08/2024 18:13

So you ban males for one night.

All the law abiding males stay indoors no male police or security guards.

All the criminals rapists pedophiles domestic abusers have free reign for one night as who is going to stop them?

If the bad men are as small a proportion of the total as many here seem to think, this will be no problem: there'll be only one or two wannabe rapists about, and the dozens of women on the streets will easily subdue them.

Dygger · 19/08/2024 18:15

You are all obnoxious bitches who choose and are probably the daughters of bad men.
There are lots of men I don’t like but not one I’m afraid of.

Wow, you sound really threatened by someone floating an idea for discussion on an internet message board. Teenage boy, I'm guessing.

Judging from this thread, feminism is well and truly dead.

FreedomDogs · 19/08/2024 18:15

twojumps · 19/08/2024 18:12

I'm not saying my suggestion is perfect but it's at least trying to make all women's lives better.

I started a thread recently asking if you've ever called the police and why. It was 99% for male violence in the street.

Honestly, something has to change. Women have to be made safer.

But this wouldn't make women safer. Because stranger attacks are already rare anyway, and the sort of man who wants to commit one is unlikely to be deterred by a curfew since they are already committing a crime. Multiple people have already pointed out to you most violence happens in the home - if your aim is to actually women safer, how would you tackle that?

Mirroredpeanuts · 19/08/2024 18:14

I’m struggling to see this idea as anything other than an ineffective, unenforceable, token gesture.

twojumps · 19/08/2024 18:14

SaintHonoria · 19/08/2024 18:13

Absolutely ridiculous.

This has to be one of the worst man hating posts I've seen on here.

I think many men would champion women having a safe evening to themselves

OP posts:
Notwhatuwanttohear · 19/08/2024 18:13

So you ban males for one night.

All the law abiding males stay indoors no male police or security guards.

All the criminals rapists pedophiles domestic abusers have free reign for one night as who is going to stop them?

SaintHonoria · 19/08/2024 18:13

Absolutely ridiculous.

This has to be one of the worst man hating posts I've seen on here.

twojumps · 19/08/2024 18:12

I'm not saying my suggestion is perfect but it's at least trying to make all women's lives better.

I started a thread recently asking if you've ever called the police and why. It was 99% for male violence in the street.

Honestly, something has to change. Women have to be made safer.

OP posts:
Yellowbananasarebetterthangreen · 19/08/2024 18:12

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Golly arent you a charmer.