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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be sad about never having grandkids

236 replies

Jjiillkkf · 19/08/2024 17:12

Aibu reasonable to find it sad that none of my children will have any of their own?

OP posts:
InevitableNameChanger · 19/08/2024 17:27

Of course yanbu. I have seen how happy being a grandparent has made so many people I know.

It's never unreasonable to feel the way you feel about something. How you handle and communicate those feelings could make you unreasonable of course

WhatNoRaisins · 19/08/2024 17:23

You're not unreasonable to feel sad, I mean if people are allowed to feel happy about grandchildren the opposite should be true. You're also not unreasonable to seek support for how you feel as long as you don't let on to your DC. Obviously it would be very unreasonable to burden your children with this.

Floralnomad · 19/08/2024 17:18

Mine won’t either , can’t say it affects me at all

LunasNewTeddy · 19/08/2024 17:18

It's not unreasonable to feel sad, as long as you don't put any pressure in them or make them feel bad about it for you. People can have a good life without children or grandchildren.

PashaMinaMio · 19/08/2024 17:18

I don’t have any grandkids. That ship has sailed.
Sometimes I get wistful and think it would be lovely but that’s very rare.
It’s a crap world we live in. Society is broken. It’s going to get worse. The world is destroying itself.

With those thoughts I’m glad I don’t have grandchildren such that I never really think about it and certainly don’t discuss it with my offspring.

mitogoshi · 19/08/2024 17:18

It's ok to be sad, it's not okay to tell them you're sad though

Mainoo72 · 19/08/2024 17:18

Well Grandchildren are never guaranteed, so it was a mistake to expect them. You need to focus on developing a full life without them.

ToffeeHammer · 19/08/2024 17:17

Please don't make your children feel guilty, or speak to them about how sad you are.

I'm an adult child who chose not to have children, and despite being sure of this since I was a teen I'm still being guilt tripped age 40 for it.

sunshineandshowers40 · 19/08/2024 17:16

How many children do you have and how old are they? It's not unreasonable to feel sad but I probably wouldn't mention to DC.

Glowingreviews · 19/08/2024 17:16

Mine won’t either but I feel relieved. How do you know that they won’t. There are many ways of having children these days.

Bannedontherun · 19/08/2024 17:14

How do you know that? I would be very sad.