Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

secretive about "good" A level grades to family.

307 replies

wheresmymillionaire · 19/08/2024 12:19

Genuine question, and I'm happy to be told I'm being nosy if necessary!
Is it normal to not share exam grades with family? We are a small family with one niece. Apparently DN was happy with her recent A level results as she passed them all, and my sister put on FB a pic of them out celebrating the results and how proud they were etc. I gave DN some money to say well done, but neither DN nor DS are prepared to say what grades she got. I just find this odd. What's the big deal? Why can't I know what grades she got and be proud of her?

My DC got between them a full mix of A* to E's so I'm not going to be judgmental!

OP posts:
twomanyfrogsinabox · 19/08/2024 12:23

Not as good as they expected. I got a very cryptic message about my niece's results. I eventually found out they were not good enough for her chosen uni and she had to get another place through clearing. Goodness knows why they thought it would be a problem just to tell me, I wasn't that invested one way or another.

Oblomov24 · 19/08/2024 12:23

I never told anyone outside immediate family what ds1 got. Why reveal the details. He got to where he wanted. Why brag about it?

JaketheVaulter · 19/08/2024 12:23

None of my kids ever shared specific grades, just that they were happy and got what they wanted.

I don't think it's anyone else's business personally, my sister was infuriated and tried to dig but didn't get anywhere.

Lavender14 · 19/08/2024 12:22

Why do you need to know op? I think you are being a bit unreasonable. It's fine obviously if they want to share but it's also fine if they don't. "Good" is subjective. I've worked with families where young people got all As and they were disappointed it wasn't A*s. You don't know how DN is feeling and you don't know how others may react to her grades so maybe they've decided to keep it quiet so she's not opened up to others feelings or opinions on them and she can just be proud for herself. Saying her grade are good and that she's happy should be enough. It's also possible she isn't happy and didn't get what she was hoping for and feels she's let people down and doesn't want to talk about it. Ultimately its for her and her parents to decide how much to share, to who and when.

JabbaTheBeachHut · 19/08/2024 12:22

Good on them if they want to keep their own business private.

Why do you need to know the results in order to be proud of them?

MangoMadness999 · 19/08/2024 12:21

Because she might have got lower than she anticipated, but still enough to secure a place at uni or whatever she plans to do next. You don't need to know her exact grades, just that she is happy and moving on to her preferred destination.

FacingTheWall · 19/08/2024 12:21

I think it’s weird and not normal in families, but it wouldn’t bother me. I’d just go on thinking they were odd!

Swipe left for the next trending thread