To think that they had no self-awareness? (It's a child-free wedding one)

Hypocrisy runs wild!
But I cannot get my head around: they said NO to bringing a baby to the CAR PARK??? Why would thay be special treatment? That makes no sense!
I wouldn't even have asked them, unless they had to give your husband some sort of guest pass to access the car park? Otherwise would just have thought me going to the car park to BF would be the same as me having gone to the toilet for few minutes?

I've seen similar threads on here - grown women admitting they don't want a baby at their wedding because they're worried he/she'll take attention away from them! It's bewildering. Do people genuinely believe all the guests at their wedding are going to be 100% focused on them for the entire day? Weddings last for ages.

Oh the audacity of them thinking rules didn't apply to them - karma indeed

Karma at its finest. Love it

So many of these stories on Mumsnet sound like absolute fabrication

Oooh, what was her response?!

But why didn't you say that @CheeseWisely? Perfectly reasonable thing to say, at her own she was probably in bridal bliss so didn't realise it.

A lot of people have rules and standards for others, but think they should be exempt. It's literally main character syndrome

How very odd of them to believe they could control who entered the car park of the venue and whether a guest went out there to BF. That alone indicates they are as daft as a pair of brushes and that all bets are off with regards to their behaviour. So not at all surprised they decided to take their own baby, or that they'd have friends who'd pause in their own nuptials to ensure the baby was evicted. All as mad as the moon OP. What on earth are you doing in such a circle?

What the fuck.

They said no to you breastfeeding in the carpark.

Why did you even ask them?

Yes I think a lot of people just have absolutely zero self-awareness.

Recently Friend A was telling me about the wedding of a mutual friend that she'd been to; we'd been invited but couldn't attend.

Friend A complained that the ceremony had been too long at 90 minutes, and that she'd had to stand in heels throughout, as she was a member of the wedding party.

Friend A's own wedding ceremony was also 90 minutes long, and there weren't enough seats for all the guests (oh and it was Central Europe in early July so near on 40 degrees without a breath of cool air to be had).

It took everything I had not to blurt out 'sounds very similar to yours, but much cooler!'

Cherrysoup

I think she was insane!
It's not as if she was a friend who had been sidelined in any way.
Meanwhile little rogue bridesmaid was happily flitting around the couple, with guests trying to stop her from photo bombing every picture! She was eventually coralled by a family with children, and baby sat.

Your mum is a legend.

That's a bit harsh. I didn't want a load of kids at my wedding, mainly because I can't have them and it upsets me sometimes.

Weddings have got so weird, they used to be just big family and friends events, all the kids and babies involved without a second thought, If anyone has seen the Peter Kay stand up bit about family weddings, that’s just how they were, I miss them!

People who can’t go because they have kids can just decline

I was the first in our friendship groups to have a baby and I had loads of issues like this. Friends inviting me out last minute and being surprised that I couldn't, friends inviting me for weekends away when I was breastfeeding and again being surprised that I couldn't make it. I got quite a lot of grief for missing things but I was a new mum, exclusively bf a prem baby who wouldn't take a bottle. The same friends all now have kids and seem outraged that people don't understand that they can't just drop everything to go on weekends away.
I just chuckle to myself

I wouldn't have asked about feeding in the car park.

It wouldn't occur to me to ask my husband to sit about like that when we could be elsewhere enjoying time together!

Well you say close relative but I guess you mean in their relationship to you.

Certainly not in their consideration of you!

I’m childless and have never married but even I totally understand that a baby is a tiny, helpless person who is totally dependent on the parents, particularly if breastfed, and also that the parents have the right to decide what’s right for their child. Therefore, in this story, I cannot believe the CFery of the bride and groom later turning up to someone else’s wedding with their baby without even asking when they had shown so little consideration for the OP.
Anyway, to me, a curious question from a toddler in a loud voice or a little boy doing “aeroplanes” on the dance floor adds to the fun!

If I saw a mum breastfeeding in the back of the car at a wedding I would be appalled that she had been made to feel so unwelcome that she had to sit in her car. Even if the wedding itself is childfree, surely the venue has some quiet rooms where a new mum can sit in comfort with her baby. Thoughtless and self absorbed.

They certainly do seem to lack self awareness/empathy. Your mum's reply was good!

I wouldn't worry about not holding the baby - lots of reasons why people decline that and they couldn't have possibly known yours in that moment. As you've said - there will be more opportunities.

Unfortunately, there are plenty of people around who are like this. Hopefully, they will be become capable of some self reflection and growth in time and you can still enjoy a relationship with then rather than obligatory tolerance - that is probably 50:50 though...

Many years ago a cousin got married , they announced it was a child free wedding . My DB and I were around 7 and 9 at the time, so childcare was organised as it was an overnight stay.Anyway my parents went and apparently found the event was full of children. My father was furious as he was her uncle, and it affected relationships down the line .

Your mum's comment was spot on.

It takes a special kind of cunt to decline a mother feeding her baby in a car park! As if that was their decision to make. They sound vile.

I've been to weddings with, without and with stealth children (invited as very close family only / no big deal made of their attendance) and I think that the lack of control some have over their children (and sometimes themselves in control of their children), plus the lack of consideration, might be resulting in a blanket ban, which hits hard. Weddings are such expensive productions now, with everyone wanting them to be perfect, the days of them being family orientated and everyone knowing one another - thinking here that everyone took turns with babies / small children / and could help discipline (in a nice way) and keep them entertained, that children didn't bother anyone - seem to be long gone and I miss the friendlier smaller scale weddings. I also remember weddings where children went off at a decent time to sleep, or home, including me as a kid, but again weddings are often so far from home that this becomes an issue too. I eloped, as it wasn't the kids that were the issue for me, but their parents (my relations) and I wasn't prepared to put up with their antics, drunken behaviour and bringing up old fueds, so I ran off and avoided it all lol!!!