To not lend tent when it’s our only means of holiday?

Could you price up a tent and tell them that when you took the tent out there was mould on it and the only way that you will now lend it out is if the people who you lend it to, pay you a deposit (this is where the price you've worked out comes into play) which would be whatever the replacement cost of a tent is to you.
If it comes back with no mould, they get their deposit back.

I mean why should you be out of pocket for the cost of a tent when they are the ones damaging it by not looking after it properly.

I think the only thing you've done wrong is not tell them exactly why you're not lending it to them.
"Unfortunately when we loaned you the tent lady time, it wasn't aired properly as you said and it has gotten mouldy and damaged over the winter. We won't be loaning out our things from now as we cannot afford to fix the damage caused by others."

I do think it was a bit short sighted not to check it before you stored it for the winter though. Tent lesson 101.

"Sorry, no, we're not lending out the tent any more. If you choose to buy one, remember that it has to be completely dry, including of condensation, before packing. Our tent is mouldy because it was packed away damp when you used it."

Christ some people are so bloody cheeky. Don’t lend her anything, it never ends well.

Yanbu. You gave them a chance last year and the tent was put away wet.

also, fair enough to borrow a tent to test if their family like camping but if they want to camp annually or regularly then they need to buy their own tent!

We camp and have had 1 tent totally ruined through high winds and one needed new air beams. They can be delicate, it’s not like lending a house!

I have a tent and would not lend it to anyone, as they won't treat it correctly, Which they have already demonstrated. Tents are very delicate and can be easily wrecked. They should buy their own, and you don't need to justify yourself to them.

You don't have to lend anything to anyone. It's yours, you don't have to share. That includes all your other camping stuff.

Tell them it came back damaged last time and you don't want to have to fix it up again. They should know they impacted you.

Lots of people don't know how to look after camping stuff, it is not something I'd ever lend out tbh

You lent it to them before and they didn't look after it properly.

Why are you worried about offending your CF friends? It's you who should be annoyed.

I agree and I would be honest with her. I’d say
“you assured me you had cleaned, dried and packed the tent for me when you returned it, but you must not have as it is all covered in mould now. I’m sorry but I’m not even sure the tent is usable at this point….”

I agree with others that if your friend seems “off” about it you will have to gently explain about the mould last time they used it. They probably thought they cleaned it properly so find your attitude strange. If they know the real reason it will hopefully make more sense to them.

YANBU. They can buy their own tent if they want one (probably some bargains about now as it's the end of the season).

I rarely lend any of my camping stuff out. Sometimes I think I'm a bit too precious about it, but other people never take the same sort of care of it as I would.

Yes I agree with this one

You were very generous to have lent it before, but you don’t need to lend it again! A decent tent isn’t that expensive - if they’ve got the means to purchase one and enjoy camping then they really need to buy their own. Very kind offer to lend all the other gear!

agree that you need to tell her they messed up your tent last time and you needed to get it cleaned. Say that it is your only source of holiday so you can’t risk it again.

Also tents deteriorate in direct relation to days erected, UV (sun) will gradually rot the fabric. No looking after can prevent that.

Tell her why you're not lending out your equipment - you returned the tent damp and mouldy last time so I'm nit going to lend it to you again.

Never lend something you can't afford to loose.
Never trust people when they say everything is OK - check it on return and be firm on requesting replacements if damaged. Tell them, in writing, that this is your expectation and make sure they acknowledge it back to you

"Sorry, when we opened it this year we found it was covered in mould so currently not sure if it's usable."

Why on earth didn't you tell her it was mouldy?

Chances are, if she's a decent person, she thought that it was either dry enough, or doesn't realise the consequences of putting a damp tent away. So, why wouldn't you say something?

Mind you, I'd probably have got the tent out to check it over when it came back to me anyway tbh. Again, not because I think anything would have deliberately happened, but mistakes happen and it's easier to fix asap. We do this when we've used the tent ourselves as it's not always easy to pack it away in a storage suitable way on a campsite. For example, last year we went away with friends and in the packing up confusion, ended up putting theirs and our tent pegs in our bag. But we found them when we got home and took the tent out to check over and returned them.

YANBU

I think they were cheeky asking the first time, the second time (now they clearly know they like camping) is taking the piss.

Tents are definitely on my list of things I do not lend (and I have refused to lend in the past). Generally speaking, as your case proves, people who need to borrow a tent tend not to understand how to care for them properly - and general wear and tear/weathering.

You've absolutely done the right thing (and were very kind, perhaps too kind, not to tell her about the mould).

I lent a large, expensive tent to someone a few years ago - friends of friends I'd never met. The big diference was that we were all holidaying together (I have many tents!) so I was there to oversee its use.

There is no way I'd lend a tent to someone if I wasn't going to he on the holiday with them for the exact reasons you've said.

There's a sale.on at GoOutdoors at the moment. You can pick up an 8 man tent for around £280. Send them there

I agree with others that being a people pleaser always ends badly. It ends with them being pissed off with you half the time so you don’t even achieve those ends!

Yep. Give some people an inch and all that.

Never lend anything you're not prepared to write off completely (including the friendship).

People new to camping might not know about not packing up a wet tent. Did you tell her about the mould? If not, it’s understandable that she’s confused/miffed.

But it’s perfectly reasonable for you to say "Sorry, but it’s our only way of having a family holiday so we've decided not to lend it out to anyone, so it will stay in good condition for as long as possible."

I lent a friend our camper van and their son pissed in the corner of it. I know accidents happen (although he wasn't a tiny child!), but they didn't even mention it. I'd have been mortified and offered to pay for a proper valet rather than let the owner find out some time later.

If they want a tent and camping gear they can buy it.

If you don't mind people borrowing you stuff then id rent it out to people and they helps recover wear and tear costs for you to replace as necessary!

YANBU
They've borrowed your stuff once so if they enjoyed camping they need to buy their own now.
You're right a tent is going to deteriorate a little bit every time it's used so it's not unreasonable to refuse to lend it out for free