To not lend tent when it’s our only means of holiday?

No, I don't lend things I can't afford to replace. In our case if they're borrowing the whole shebang that's like £1000 of kit. No chance!

We used to do a lot of camping, but kids grown now.
perhaps as the season is ending for the uk you could suggest she might pick up a bargain now, to get their own, before next year. I would be reluctant to have lent out one of our big family tents, they are expensive and need to be treated with care.

I don't lend expensive things to anyone, even to my very best friends. Why? Because If it's damaged or not returned in the exact condition I would prefer to avoid a fallout and I do not want to buy something expensive twice. So no, we don't lend things out.

Someone I know asked to borrow something that they knew we wouldn't be using, and I said no. I didn't even feel bad. I always think if it's damaged, very few people will reimburse you. So lesson learnt for you, if you aren't expecting it back then lend it, if not say NO.

Even if it comes back with no damage, every time the tent gets put up it sustains damage from UV rays, shortening the life of the tent, and bring forward the time when it needs msintenance., the weaker the fabric the more likely It is to tear, also the elastic in the poles if it's that sort. It brings forward the time when it needs reproofing, and fabsil.isnt cheap, you need.brushes/sprayers to it takes time for you to do this, keep it dry til it can be put away.
I'm not saying that I personally would never lend a tent, I would to a trusted friend who perhaps wanted to try out camping before investing in their own kit, but I would never lend one to someone I suspected would.not treat it respectfully or on a regular basis.
Nowadays you can hire tents, or go to a site where they have say bell tents with all the stuff you need. I've seen on campsites that I've been on, that there are companies that will come to the site, put a tent and everything up, and then take it down at the end of the stay (for a few obviously)
Now is a good time to buy second hand stuff, people upgrade, or decide that once is enough. My last.2 quality tents were bought round this time of year, much much cheaper than buying from new,and the friends need to look at this idea, or when the discount supermarkets sell tents.

🙄🙄🙄 why don't you RTFT?

Aye you hand someone your possibly £600 plus tent who you know doesn’t look after it for the shits and gigs.

Also tents have a shelf life even if perfectly
looked after due to uv rays.

Some tents are over £1,000.

did you read OPs post at all. They lent the tent once, they returned it mouldy and you think they should lend it again?
Are you happy to keep lending out items that come back damaged?

I think u should just give them it and stop being so selfish

Don't lend for sure. Daughter's tent was ruined by lending to a friend of hers, she never got the poles back, (and not replaced), she didn't learn and lent something else and again it was wrecked
I don't get that they were inexperienced with camping which meant they didn't know to make sure it was dry before putting it away. You'd not parcel up damp clothing or bedding for the winter in bags would you, as it would go mouldy,why would it be ok to do the same.with something else made out of materials which would go mouldy when damp

It’s your tent. You don’t need to lend it out. I don’t see why you need to justify your decision. A simple “no, I’m afraid we can’t loan you the tent” would suffice.

Not unreasonable. Don't lend it out but tell friend truth why not. Taking care of camping stuff is very important isn't it?

They are CF. They need to buy their own. Stick to your guns and don't feel guilty.

They can go to a pre-pitched site if they don't want their own tent.

Wealthy friends always were asking to borrow my things, clothes, caravan, relatives to stay at my house, car seats goodness knows what and generally returned in a sorry state. One year I had the audacity to ask to borrow a kitchen chair at Christmas, they were going away and I was one short. I was told their chairs were expensive so not possible. I wonder if your friends are like mine, takers not sharers. Say oh sorry no!

You were being unreasonable not to check the tent carefully after they returned it.

You were being unreasonable not to tell them that it got mouldy as soon as you realised. If you weren't assertive enough to ask them to clean it or buy you a new tent, you could still have given them the opportunity to offer.

Also, if they are not experienced campers, they might not have realised how important it was to dry out the tent, so tbh you would have been doing them a favour by advising them to do it properly next time, whether they are borrowing a tent or whether they've bought their own.

YANBU to learn your lesson about lending out your expensive tent and not lend it any more. It's just that you need to tell your friend the real reason.

I think you should tell them you found your tent to be mouldy, and how the wear&tear could impact your only means of going on vacation. If they don't understand they're not real friends. Dor them it's "only" one of several ways of travelling, for you it's the only one and you need to protect it.

Tell her to buy her own tent!!

As others have said, no need to lend them the tent.
You could explain it gets mouldy if not properly dried out, and that's difficult to do in your small garden - they should get the message.

Tell them to buy their own tent.

This.

I think even if it came back in perfect condition I would say no. Borrow once to see if you like camping and if you do, get your own kit!

I would reply

I've just had a think about things and got tent out for you. It's covered in mould from when you borrowed it? Been packed away damp despite your reassurance. If you can replace it with like for like you can certainly borrow the replacement

You don’t have to lend anything out, ever. If it’s easier just make up a white lie, “My brother in law is lending it that week” or “I’ve lost the tent poles”

Stand your ground. I wouldn't lend it out, it's too important to you and they didn't take the best care of it last time. Through experience I have found that lending and borrowing stuff is one of the easiest routes to bad feelings and falling out. It is never worth it and if they really are good friends they should understand.

This.

If they want to borrow it and can't be arsed to return it in a decent state, they don't get to play with it.