Wedding guest dress

Don’t be silly. It’s got nothing to do with that. It’s just that the only dress people should be admiring is the brides!

It’s just polite not to outshine the bride on her wedding day 🙄

There’s another thread currently with a dress for an autumn wedding ( green with autumnal colour pattern). It’s so much more in keeping with the sorts of things I see at weddings, and it reassured me that it really isn’t that difficult to get right. Obviously oP may have an idea (that I don’t) of what the dress code/ venue/ other guests suggest will be appropriate, but coming back to this thread after the other I was struck anew by this one seeming really ott. It sort of sits in an odd space between little girly and risqué. Honestly it looks to me like Bo Peep after a roll in the hay with her beau. But I guess different weddings might call for something more elaborate than others. This just kind of … seems wrong to me.

No one ever accuses a man in a great suit of trying to upstage the groom, do they.

I might if the jacket and shirt were backless, showing their whole back and shoulders.

But my raised eyebrow wouldn’t be about being a ‘prude’ or upstaging anyone, it would be about flashing flesh in a church or formal occasion.

This.

You wouldn't wear this to the office either.

I suppose this is where the qualifier of “knowing the tone of the event” comes into it. I’ve worked in offices where this dress would be absolutely fine and I’ve seen women wearing dresses like it (fashion, media, tech, startups) and ones where it wouldn’t be fine at all (insurance, banking, trading.) The OP presumably knows her family and friends and that she isn’t attending the very conservative wedding of a religious and modest couple with a lot of prim elderly guests where an exposed back and shoulders might be frowned upon because formal attire is expected. I’ve yet to see any thread involving somebody posting something they intend to wear to a wedding where they don’t already have a reasonably good idea of the tone of the event and the guests, more than strangers on MN will.

I totally agree

For me this isn't about "upstaging" the bride or looking better than her or whatever but more about what appropriate formal attire is.

You wouldn't wear this to the office either - not because you would upstage your boss but because a dress held together by string isn't what you wear to the office.

There is a huge middle ground between "frumpy" (a word I hate anyway - because it's used to put down women) and a dress that's one dance move away from a wardrobe malfunction

Men absolutely can, and do, wear suits which "stand out" compared to the groom

All suits aren't just plain blue or black

Add in ties which are a bit "extra", shoes, hair, beard...

Plenty of ways men dress up and showoff but they're never criticised for it.

They're often complimented if anything, for being different and daring and unique

No one ever accuses a man in a great suit of trying to upstage the groom, do they.

Well no, because a man in a suit wouldn't stand out. A suit is the usual, expected attire at most weddings. It is the normal thing to wear and wouldn't be upstaging anything.

I am finding it odd that people can't understand there is a very, very long line between 'frumpy' and the dress the OP is asking about.
I was at a wedding recently and - as you would expect - there were lots of young women there dressed beautifully. In dresses that were appropriate for a wedding. Not dresses you would wear to work, or to go clubbing, but elegant dresses for a wedding, or slightly more formal occasion than a night clubbing.

Great post

You can say that about all clothes.
Of course they look different on the model.
It doesn't mean it will look bad!

Anyone talking about dressing frumpy to please the bride needs to give their head a good wobble.

I dress for myself, nobody else.

Gosh I wasn't expecting that when I clicked on the link!

Looks like a nightie that's caught in her pants at the front!! 😂

I understood what you meant @JuicyBlueberry, I still think it's bonkers though.

Christ. Talk about seizing on one bit of a post.

I said,
ME, I wouldn't risk upsetting a friend over a dress. I would dress a BIT frumpy to please a friend getting married, IF that would make her happy.

I was saying what I would be willing to do to make a friend happy. At no point did I say everybody has to nor that every bride would want that.

It was just a way to say I'd put a friend's feelings before my own IF I KNEW my look would likely upset her.

Me, I, bit, if.

This is why I stayed away from this place for three years. Hall full of people who take other people's opinion as a personal affront. Nitpicking word choice, one sentence, spelling or phrases. Constantly spoiling for a fight. Too many people who freak out if not everyone holds the exact same view as them. It's exhausting. I regret returning now. It never changes. I take that back, it's gotten worse.

I love it. I always consider the type of wedding before choosing my outfit - the type of couple, the time of year, colour scheme (if you can find out or tell from the invitation), the location (beach / farm / field / church / city) and choose my outfit accordingly. You will know these details OP, if you feel it works (and it doesn't match the colour of the bridesmaids) then go for it!

Wow that’s a gorgeous dress I love it! OP, get it - you’re going to look beautiful.

If I had a wedding I'd tell the guests the dress code was "wear your absolute favourite thing". Could be a beautiful dress ... could be your comfiest PJs ... the t-shirt you were wearing when your partner proposed ... that out-of-style frock you never wore enough even though you wanted to ... the ratty old jumper your late, beloved grandma knitted for you ... the executive suit that makes you feel like a boss at work ... your own wedding dress ... literally anything.

It's a fun dress OP, go for it!

I think it looks great. It definitely wouldn't look out of place at any wedding I've been to. As a bride, I honestly couldn't tell you what any of my guests wore other than it wasn't a white gown and veil. I say go for it if you like it!

I'm getting married next year and It wouldn't bother me if a guest wore that dress but I'm not very bridzillary. I think the back of the dress is pretty but personally I think the front looks like a piece of old material wrapped round to look like a dress

lovely colour but to me its a bit too partyish be perhaps ok if you were just going to the evening do but for church or office sit down meal no bit too fancy

If you need to ask you know the answer.

It's one of my bugbears that manufacturers use online only to get away with cheap fabric.

Dye, especially bold colour dye, sits differently on polyester and tends to look a bit cheap. Just the addition of some natural fibre in the fabric would help that deep fuschia pink look a lot nicer - which it deserves as it is a lovely colour.

Yes the criss cross does look uncomfortable and makes me think of those cuts of trussed meat that are bound with meat netting/twine for a pot roast.

Uncomfortable and just not very practical for something you’ll be wearing all day. What if the strap ends get caught on something or someone as you brush past or work themselves loose as you dance the night away. Also,the model is 5ft 10 and a size 8 and has no bust. It’s not going to look the same on someone who is 5ft 6,a size 10 and with bigger boobs.

Gorgeous dress which was linked on another thread

Completely inappropriate especially if it's a church wedding as there's too much flesh on display. Even if it's a civil wedding, there's still too much flesh on display for a wedding.