Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want fertility MOT

30 replies

theurbanpigeon · 16/08/2024 16:28

I've just turned 30 and recently got married (DH is 29). We want kids but in 3-4 years - DH in particular adamant about this. I am fine with this and happy with our current lifestyle, but feeling a lot of anxiety relating to having potential issues if we wait further down the line.

I've been saying maybe we should go get fertility tested now; that way we know if there are any issues / we need to try sooner, or if I can relax about waiting til I'm 33/34. Obviously though we'd have to do this privately and it would cost about £700. DH thinks this is a waste of time money.

AIBU to think it's worth it for the peace of mind? For context I've never had any reason to think I might have problems (regular periods etc) but then aware that often things can be undetected til you start trying. Feeling very stressed about this!

TIA x

OP posts:
parietal · 16/08/2024 16:51

What is the reason for waiting 4 years? Is there a clear goal like buying a house or is it just "I don't feel ready". If the latter, how do you both know he will be ready on 4 years?

MiddleParking · 16/08/2024 16:45

I’d be more inclined to MOT the marriage. It sounds like you’re not quite on the same page. If it was up to you, would you TTC now? If so, I think four years is a very long time to wait.

EsmeSusanOgg · 16/08/2024 16:41

theurbanpigeon · 16/08/2024 16:28

I've just turned 30 and recently got married (DH is 29). We want kids but in 3-4 years - DH in particular adamant about this. I am fine with this and happy with our current lifestyle, but feeling a lot of anxiety relating to having potential issues if we wait further down the line.

I've been saying maybe we should go get fertility tested now; that way we know if there are any issues / we need to try sooner, or if I can relax about waiting til I'm 33/34. Obviously though we'd have to do this privately and it would cost about £700. DH thinks this is a waste of time money.

AIBU to think it's worth it for the peace of mind? For context I've never had any reason to think I might have problems (regular periods etc) but then aware that often things can be undetected til you start trying. Feeling very stressed about this!

TIA x

I think this is £350 for both of you at London Women's Clinic. Not sure who is charging £700!

Mrsttcno1 · 16/08/2024 16:40

You can, but things can change quickly. Being all good now is no guarantee that you’ll still be fine in 4 years. Equally you could both be perfectly healthy and it still take 2 years of trying to conceive.

AceOfCups · 16/08/2024 16:35

You could just get an AMH blood test. This will give you an idea of ovarian reserve. Would be cheaper than a full MOT.

Swipe left for the next trending thread