To refuse to see a health visitor?

I’m pregnant with my second and declining the initial home visit they do. Last time she was obsessed with the idea my cat would murder the baby 🙄 I never found them to be helpful, in fact some of the advice we were given was bizarre. once Covid came they all buggered off where we live and the weigh clinic has never been reestablished so I’ll likely still see them postnatally just for weigh ins.

My youngest is 3 and I've seen her health visitor once and she is a lying bitch. Said we refused her help and that there was red bull cans everywhere.

1. We don't even drink red bull
2. We already had a 6yo at the time so didn't need her advice.

I've got 3 children and always found the health visitors extremely annoying.

I always allowed them to visit though....just to make them go away.

I declined health visitors with my second. I found their input to quite detrimental to my mental health with my first and they were zero help with establishing breastfeeding etc. I was sent a letter to arrange the first visit and just replied to say no thank you.

You can refuse if you want but I don't know why you would. Health visitors aren't supposed to snoop, they only come to your house to save you struggling out to the clinic with a new baby, or because they are struggling to find clinic space now that most children's centres have closed.

Our health visitor only ever went anywhere in our house apart from the living room once and that was when she was concerned that we had 5 dc in the same bedroom. She came round and had a chat with us and then said that she didn't need to see the bedroom as it wasn't part of her job description to inspect bedrooms. She just wanted to check we didn't want her to msg the council about social housing. But I'd already tidied up especially for her visit and dh had bought them all matching duvets (I don't know why he thought that might make a difference) so she got the grand tour anyway! The bedroom was huge and was originally 2 rooms but the landlord had knocked down the dividing wall in the 1980's. As our dc got older the house needed major work done so we asked the landlord to put the wall back at the same time and we now have 3 dc in one room and 2 in the other.

The midwife will be doing a few home visits after the birth anyway so someone will see the baby at home.

I see no benefit in HVs, especially if you have already had a child. I can't think of a single bit of useful information they provided. And the one I had for DD1 was actively harmful.

The midwife comes over the day after you’re discharged so someone will see you and your baby even if you opt out of the health visitor. Mine drove me batty, I’m not having another one but if I did I’d consider not seeing one again.

Why?
Isn't it easier for you post partum for them to pop round and check you and baby are ok?
Probably only get one visit anyway if you are all ok??
It's also important for safeguarding that ALL children are seen at least once in own home.

Or do you have a reason not to? Growing weed on the windowsill?, your drinking and taking drugs, EX L Bully dog? Boyfriend who is a sex offender? Living in a dirty messy house with rubbish over the floor???
If none of the above just get in with having your visit and be grateful your child is in a safe and loving home. many children are not!

You can refuse them, absolutely.

I didn't, but they only came round once, immediately after we were discharged from the midwife. Haven't seen them since, really - two checks, 12 months and 24 months, but at a local medical centre, and not with our actual HV. Nothing else at home.

You’re not required to see the health visitor, it’s your decision.

It sounds like you’ve had bad experiences with them in the past?

I've never found them helpful and haven't seen them since my kids were 2 years old and 6 weeks old. It's supposed to be an opt in service yet the way they go about it means it's more opt out. Definitely not necessary though if you don't want to.