To tell MIL she can't hold baby

Also this. My MIL always, always, alwayssss updates us on her health if we are due to visit. If she has the slightest chance of a cold, we reschedule.

Is she actually properly ill or are you being a bit over sensitive?

Ignore the utterly stupid people who are making you feel daft worrying about someone who is visibly ill holding your baby. Babies gave ZERO immunity from common colds and virus floating around, only have protected immunity from mum for viruses mum has had for a limited time. Considering there are thousands of strains of colds, some much worse than others , this can be very risky for newborns. Babies acquire an immune system going about day to day life, you do not need to put your baby directly in the 'firing line' of illnesses! Trust your gut. I did exactly the same with my children as newborns and also got people to wash their hands before holding baby and absolutely not allowed to kiss baby face/ hands!

Pfb alert

It’s her Grandchild, let her hold the baby.

Baby is breastfed? Keep her on your chest. You know you don’t have to give up your child if you don’t want to, right?

So selfish of her to put you in this awkward position in the first place. Don’t see why she couldn’t have seen the decent thing to do would’ve been to have messaged beforehand and said she was unwell (clearly she’s feeling shit if she’s taking medicine for it!) and let you make your own decision form there. I’m not one to panic about illness generally but your baby is 7 weeks old! That’s still so tiny.

I'm sorry-but you obviously have a cold-you'll have to wait til next time to hold the baby
It doesn't seem to be obvious since OP@s husband hasn't even notice. As some poster stated, it could very well be hayfever, I gave it quite bad this week.

How about a kind rather than defensive approach? Such as: Hi MIL, I've notice you were taking cough tablets. Are you ok, can I help in anyway? If you don't mind, I think it is probably better if you don't held baby on this occasion just in case, but how about you come over in two weeks time?

Obviously phrase it in the best way possible but the bottom line is it’s not happening today.
The child’s welfare trumps hurt feelings every time. A reasonable person would understand, an unreasonable one will find something else to fall out over anyway. 🤷🏼‍♀️

You are not precious at all. I stayed away from people with colds when mine were babies, and I am pretty relaxed when it comes to health. A young baby with a cold is hard work even if they are not very unwell. They don't feed well, they don't sleep well etc. Not a big deal if they end up getting a cold, but why not try to avoid it?? I don't hug people that are ill myself, why should my baby??

‘Depriving’ 🤣 I’m sorry, but what?! Any decent person would totally understand and actively avoiding trying to pass on an illness to a newborn. They’d understand their WANT for a cuddle isn’t as important as the babies NEED to avoid infection.

The GP won’t be the one caring for a sick newborn who’s struggling to sleep because they feel awful or struggling to feed as their nose is blocked - a newborn can’t easily breathe through their mouth. A 7wk old still can’t have Calpol, so you can’t even make them comfortable.

If someone took that greater offence to not holding a baby because they were unwell, then they’re probably not someone you’d want around anyway

Ohhhhh, tough one OP. I would NOT want anyone with cold sores holding my child. It’s a hard NO.

This. One of my sisters is also a paediatric nurse and was telling me last weekend about the numbers of babies hospitalised with "just a cold" that can be fatal.

These poor things have to be tube fed and helped to breathe, not to mention the nursing time taken and multiple bed spaces 365 days a year.

Yeah, definitely do this. And wait for all hell to break loose and to be blamed for ruining the relationship .

YABU. There is no real risk here

My daughter caught a cold from her siblings as a newborn.

She's now a thriving 8 month old.

Well, people don't need lots of things.

I still can't imagine depriving a grandparent of a cuddle with their new grandchild over a minor cold. Each to their own, of course, but OP can't be surprised when it has a negative impact on their relationship.

Somwhy does that not apply to others

It’s completely different if a caregiver is unwell.

When my husband and I had norovirus we still had to care for our children, we’d not take our children to a house we knew had a stomach bug going around though.

Sick parents still need to care for their babies, sick grandparents don’t need a cuddle.

Just tell her not to kiss the baby? Surely?

I am not remotely precious about this stuff. But I instinctively keep away from close contact with anybody when I have a cold, never mind a newborn baby.

Do you have a sling/carrier? Could you put the baby in there and if she asks to hold blame it on the baby being grizzly today and say prob better not today?

Don’t let her kiss your baby.

Be scrupulously clean and not kiss the baby

Even if it's you that's unwell .? So you won't hold your own baby,?