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To expect exH to warn me if he’s bringing kids over

36 replies

Imaysnapandfart · 15/08/2024 19:02

ExH took kids on holiday for a week so I had made plans for my evenings without the kids. I had arranged a date for this evening but without warning, the kids turned up at mine two days early.
ExH was like “surprise!”

And while of course I’m over the moon to see my kids as I had missed them, I was a bit miffed at not having had any notice, and having to cancel plans at such short notice.
Am I being unreasonable to expect some sort of pre warning? I mean, what if I had had the date over and we were in the middle of something?

OP posts:
Imaysnapandfart · 15/08/2024 19:18

TheChosenTwo · 15/08/2024 19:15

Totally bang out of order is what it is.
He took them on holiday for a week but returned them 2 days earlier than agreed? Why?
What would he have done if you were already out?
Idiot. (Him obviously)

i don’t think he could cope with having to actually parent for a long period of time. It was a Center Parcs type thing and he assumed the kids could just entertain themselves while he chilled out. But they’re 10 and 12 so not completely
independent.

OP posts:
Mairzydotes · 15/08/2024 19:18

He's done it on purpose, hoping to catch you out.

Lampzade · 15/08/2024 19:18

I would have told him that you have made plans and that he would have to take the kids with him.
I am pretty sure he would be mightily pissed off if you dropped the kids at his home without notice. Why should you be expected to do the same?

takeabeat · 15/08/2024 19:17

This is weird and totally unreasonable of him. Absolute Disney dad syndrome - oh I'm bored of the kids / holiday / being a dad - I'll hand them back to their actual parent. Sigh.

Do you think he knew you had a date and wanted to sabotage? It does seem weird timing.

Can totally see why you're annoyed!

Hankunamatata · 15/08/2024 19:16

Yikes. What if you had been shagging in the middle of the sitting room with someone your kids havnt met. Ob ex thinks you have no life

itsgettingweird · 15/08/2024 19:16

"Surprise."

What a cock. How would he feel if you turned up with them Thursday instead of Saturday for weekend contact and said "surprise".

It shows a complete disrespect for your time and right to a life.

I'd absolutely be saying something once Out of earshot of the kids.

TheChosenTwo · 15/08/2024 19:15

Totally bang out of order is what it is.
He took them on holiday for a week but returned them 2 days earlier than agreed? Why?
What would he have done if you were already out?
Idiot. (Him obviously)

Imaysnapandfart · 15/08/2024 19:15

Mickey79 · 15/08/2024 19:13

Completely unreasonable, it’s the assumption that I wouldnt have any other plans that would piss me off!

Yes exactly - this too! It just feels unfair. I haven’t been in a date for so long and was looking forward to being an adult for an evening.

OP posts:
Mickey79 · 15/08/2024 19:13

Completely unreasonable, it’s the assumption that I wouldnt have any other plans that would piss me off!

Imaysnapandfart · 15/08/2024 19:07

Daughter has a key and they can track me on their phones so would have known I was home. I feel guilty for being annoyed because it’s lovely to see them, but I also feel like I’ve lost an evening.

OP posts:
Andwegoroundagain · 15/08/2024 19:06

Yes utterly unreasonable of him!
Not much you can do though if he's just dropped them off with no warning. Don't answer the door ?

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