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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to find this really fucking annoying even though it doesn't really affect me much

237 replies

walkway8 · 15/08/2024 15:52

I live in a detached house with a walkway between myself and the neighbours to access both our gardens at the back (diagram attached).

The neighbour has a front garden whereas I have a driveway. They have a gate that opens to the side of my house to allow them access to the walkway to get to their back garden. The walkway is shared land according to the deeds but stops at the top of my driveway (basically my driveway isn't shared but the walkway is).

Whenever my neighbour is doing anything in their garden, bringing this in / out of the garden/ taking things from the garden to their car on the road or whatever, they will go up and down my driveway instead of going through their gate and then down their garden.

It really annoys me. I don't really know why but AIBU to think this is just an odd thing to do?

My living room window looks onto my driveway and some days they will be working in the garden and making multiple trips up and down my drive and I feel awkward and like I need to close my blinds.

I don't even have a bad relationship with them, not friends or close but fine neighbours and we say hello how are you etc when we see them.

But I just find the whole thing really weird. I would never dream of strolling up and down their garden path repeatedly.

We also have cars on the drive so when they are bringing things in and out it worries me they will get scratched.

Aibu to find this annoying and tbh a bit rude?

to find this really fucking annoying even though it doesn't really affect me much
OP posts:
Thread gallery
13
BurntBroccoli · 15/08/2024 16:51

@Icanttakethisanymore
I know! I love a good land ownership puzzle! 😁

AugustAlready · 15/08/2024 16:51

BurntBroccoli · 15/08/2024 16:36

Or padlocked gate and fence here

That makes much more sense, if you really want to keep them off the drive without restricting your own access.

(bonus of being cheaper too!)

I wonder if they have dogs or small children?? If not I'd just take the gate off (if I was the neighbour) or at least have a catch to keep it held open if I was needing to be in & out whilst gardening or whatever.

Though @walkway8 given their going from the walkway to the road via your driveway, and the walkway is along the side of your house, how are they coming near your front windows??

MintyNew · 15/08/2024 16:51

Moveoverdarlin · 15/08/2024 16:44

Say they go to the garden centre and come back with bags of compost, plants and other stuff, I can see why they wouldn’t take it in their front garden, take it straight out their front garden and then down the walkway. You are going to get this regardless who lives there.

I don’t think they’re being that cheeky, but I can see why it annoys you. People aren’t getting it because you didn’t add that extra gate at the front of their property. Before it looked like the ONLY access was up and down your drive.

Op said they would have more room on their side, it's just the hassle of opening the gate to get to street. I mean surely they know it is not their property? Possibly not aware if they had to never check access but walking around someone else's cars or noticing op through the window would make anyone stop and think. If this was a detached property would anyone think it's ok just to walk on someone else's property, because this is what these neighbours are doing

Icanttakethisanymore · 15/08/2024 16:50

BurntBroccoli · 15/08/2024 16:49

On this plan
Hatched green is OPs land, hatched purple is neighbour and the hatched orange is the shared walkway.
I have also added a front gate that the OP said the neighbour's have.

Thank goodness you weren't here on page one, we'd have missed out on loads of misunderstanding 😂

BurntBroccoli · 15/08/2024 16:49

On this plan
Hatched green is OPs land, hatched purple is neighbour and the hatched orange is the shared walkway.
I have also added a front gate that the OP said the neighbour's have.

to find this really fucking annoying even though it doesn't really affect me much
Icanttakethisanymore · 15/08/2024 16:49

You will clearly have to ask them not to do it if you want them to stop, or if you really can't bear to utter the words then you'll have to put up with it until you put your gate in.

KarmenPQZ · 15/08/2024 16:48

Planters. Or even leave your bins there one day and it should do the job

to find this really fucking annoying even though it doesn't really affect me much
MintyNew · 15/08/2024 16:46

Yanbu, this would highly annoy me especially when they have guests and all are traipsing on your property. This isn't ok at all. The biggest reason being that they are walking on property that is NOT theirs. What if they scratched the car? Then what? I think the best thing would be to mark the property off. I'm not sure what reason you could come up with but you should close it off. I don't get why people are not understanding the frustration of this?

Cranarc · 15/08/2024 16:46

After reading your OP I thought you were a bit barking, TBH. Now I have seen all of the diagrams I think you are not unreasonable to be annoyed, especially if they are lugging bins and large items across your drive that could damage your cars.

KarmenPQZ · 15/08/2024 16:45

walkway8 · 15/08/2024 16:39

Yes probably! I think when you know something IRL you don't realise that it can be confusing to someone who's never seen it if that makes sense.

Anyway planters at the top of the drive might be an idea until a gate is put up.

I was thinking planters at the bottom migth be less of a parking hazzard for you and still do the job. Sympathies as I can see it’s a very annoying position and not sure why people have struggles to get it so much in the thread. These drives / shared paths are quite common in some parts and annoying your neighbours have out a gate to make there’s so much less appealing than yours!

Moveoverdarlin · 15/08/2024 16:44

Say they go to the garden centre and come back with bags of compost, plants and other stuff, I can see why they wouldn’t take it in their front garden, take it straight out their front garden and then down the walkway. You are going to get this regardless who lives there.

I don’t think they’re being that cheeky, but I can see why it annoys you. People aren’t getting it because you didn’t add that extra gate at the front of their property. Before it looked like the ONLY access was up and down your drive.

RafaFan · 15/08/2024 16:44

Unless they're dragging heavy items up and down your driveway, scarring the tarmac, and brushing stuff down the side of your car repeatedly I would ignore it for the sake of good relations.

The plot layouts seem designed to cause neighbour problems in my opinion. I can see that they lose ground at the front, while you lose ground at the back so it's "fair" in that sense. But why the planners didn't just put the boundary right down the middle is a mystery. I used to live in a similar property and the front had a fence down the middle, and each house had a gate set diagonally between the fence and the corner of the house.

natalienewname · 15/08/2024 16:42

It’s very clear to me, no confusion and it would 100% irritate me.

They should use their own access, why on earth do they think it’s acceptable to trespass on your land rather than go via their own garden?

Options: 1. Would be just to ask them ‘would you mind not using my drive to access the path? I appreciate it’s an extra 3 steps for you to go via your own garden but I don’t want to risk any scratches on my car or damage to my property. Thank you’

option 2: some plant pots strategically placed at the end of the path so they are forced to turn into their own garden but you can still park without any issues. Or a trellis that comes out at a right angle at the end of the perhaps?

NoSquirrels · 15/08/2024 16:42

BurntBroccoli · 15/08/2024 16:36

Or padlocked gate and fence here

I’d do this, but first explain to neighbours that I needed to do so for ‘reasons’ [make up your own - insurance says vehicles not secure enough, need extra parking space/configuration, whatever sounds plausible] so I didn’t just look like a bit of a mardy arse deliberately inconveniencing them. Which, of course, it will. So needs a bit of tact.

longdistanceclaraclara · 15/08/2024 16:42

Who owns the end of the walkway? I'm struggling here. Op are you saying the end of the walkway is your drive?

AugustAlready · 15/08/2024 16:41

@Lightbluetouchpaper

mine do because we have a shared path from the parking to our front doors.its momentarily distracting when someone passes by, but that's all. The windows are big & low, so they can see right in... I don't care. There's nothing very exciting in my lounge & I'm not doing anything in there I'd be embarassed for them
to see. It's nice say 'Hi' as they pass, especially if I'm washing up.

SockFluffInTheBath · 15/08/2024 16:41

We have a shared drive OP, not the same layout. It sounds petty to some, but this is the kind of thing that would piss me right off. YANBU.

Mickey79 · 15/08/2024 16:40

I’m with you op, your neighbours are being very lazy, using your driveway rather than their own front garden just because it’s easier to do. Block their access using one of the suggestions already posted by others.

bergamotorange · 15/08/2024 16:39

walkway8 · 15/08/2024 16:38

And this can be repeatedly throughout the day, not just once every couple of weeks to nip the bins down. They do a lot of gardening so some days it can be a constant up and down as they are bringing things in and out.

Just tell them you're getting a gate on the boundary line, stick some planters there til it is done.

The previous owner possibly allowed it.

walkway8 · 15/08/2024 16:39

lucywho123 · 15/08/2024 16:37

I think the later diagram should have been posted initially to avoid the confusion but I would be pissed off too tbh OP. Although im not sure why you dont either put something at the very end of your walkway that leads out onto the road to stop them using it or actually just add a fence there to block off the access completely? Are you planning to?

Yes probably! I think when you know something IRL you don't realise that it can be confusing to someone who's never seen it if that makes sense.

Anyway planters at the top of the drive might be an idea until a gate is put up.

OP posts:
bergamotorange · 15/08/2024 16:38

BurntBroccoli · 15/08/2024 16:36

Or padlocked gate and fence here

This, it is a tiny gap to fence, job done.

Can be blocked with planters easily too.

walkway8 · 15/08/2024 16:38

And this can be repeatedly throughout the day, not just once every couple of weeks to nip the bins down. They do a lot of gardening so some days it can be a constant up and down as they are bringing things in and out.

OP posts:
RandomUsernameHere · 15/08/2024 16:37

Could just be that they don't realise where the shared area ends, or they haven't thought about it.

lucywho123 · 15/08/2024 16:37

I think the later diagram should have been posted initially to avoid the confusion but I would be pissed off too tbh OP. Although im not sure why you dont either put something at the very end of your walkway that leads out onto the road to stop them using it or actually just add a fence there to block off the access completely? Are you planning to?

AugustAlready · 15/08/2024 16:37

@walkway8

no, I thinks it's just SO illogical. The person that drew up the deeds was an idiot to divide the land like that.