Why do so many posters hate mothers/children

So… why all the MN threads and news articles about this happening if it doesn’t happen?

Why was I asked to move so often in my 20s and early 30s, if the airlines can just move everyone around?

"What are you talking about?" I think you might be that parent @Bellsandthistle

Seriously why do you think people, especially parents, bother to book and pay extra for specific seats? An airline will try to sit you next to your child, but if everyone else on the flight has booked (and paid for) specific seats, you might end up with that not happening. No one would owe it to you to move so you could be next to your child. They might, to be nice. And I would if it didn't inconvenience me, but not if it did.

I do wonder if those parents on planes ever offer to refund the passenger who has moved for them. I suspect rarely, if ever!

Because the site is infiltrated with men, people without kids and not parents and people who just post about you name it, not always family related

the worst is the sheer immorality of some posts

If parents don’t book together the airline will normally rearrange so they are together. That’s an airline policy issue. Otherwise, to all the people who hate mothers and children, have fun sitting next to a toddler that isn’t yours.
😁

@LewishamMumNow Your post is pretty offensive. Between the vague accusation that some childless people are akin to racists, and the martyrish lecture about how great our lives are because we’re doing none of the work to help society…

I don’t hate parents or children but I do take issue with people who think that once they have children, they’re on a pedestal above those who don’t.

Have you never seen one of the MN threads or newspaper articles about parents not booking and being separated from their children, then being angry because someone wouldn’t swap seats?

I’ve asked so many times and until I joined MN I didn’t realise how many parents deliberately don’t pay!

The CAA guidelines say parent and child should be seated next to each other but defines that as including a row apart and across the aisle. And they’re guidelines, not rules.

The extra leg room seats are usually next to the doors. I don’t think they permit children to sit there because you have to assist in an emergency, so there’s no prospect of being asked to move from an extra legroom seat for a child.

What are you talking about? Airlines seat minors with the adult automatically if not booked (which I do anyway). It’s not a matter of wanting anyone to move.

That works on flights with lots of room but what happens when people have paid extra for specific seats and then you want them to move because you didn't book yours?

I don’t understand this gripe. I travel with children a lot and every airline I’ve flown has a policy of sitting children under 12 with their accompanying adult at no charge anyway. Because it makes sense for everyone and is a child safeguarding issue.

Sorry pressed post

I adore my kids and I arranged my life so I could be with them as much as possible. Didn't expect the state to pay me for doing so and didn't think I had a right to other people's plane seats, or to take them to child free weddings or expensive restaurants late at night and let them yell through dinner. Because they were mine to bring up, not everyone else's.

I don't park in p&c spaces - I do actually think they should be reserved for people who have car seats and prams and wriggly toddlers to keep safe. They need to be wide spaces, near safe paths. If I had a blue badge I wouldn't park in P&C unless absolutely necessary. I do think it's considerate to leave these spaces free for parents with young kids if you possible can.
I wouldn't move seats on a plane to accommodate people who cba to book (and pay for) the seats they need if it meant I was away from my own group or in a worse seat.

While society has a responsibility to keep children from harm, it doesn't have more responsibility than their own parents to pay for them or accommodate their needs.

It's not fair to ask people without children to always work Christmas - it shows no respect or consideration for their lives or families. If you have a job which requires Christmas working, the only way to avoid resentment is to take it in turns. Part of this problem comes about because some parents think that their children should become everyone else's priority too.

I adore my kids and i

It's almost as if people don't realise that they too were children at some point. Such selfishness.

Aa a teacher of 25 years, I have noticed more and more girls in recent years yelling 'It's not fair!" when what they really mean is 'I didn't get my own way !'

I think aibu brings out the worst in [some] people, yes. But there's a much bigger mumsnet space to explore. Some of the best advice I've received regarding SEN issues came from mumsnet. The goady, hateful posters (and there are some, yes) are few and far between - and usually they're called out by others, even on aibu.

I am utterly sick of the recent use of the word “hate” to mean anything other than complete agreement. Hate is a very strong word and this misuse is not helpful to a constructive discussion on any topic.
People who laugh at something/someone or simply have another view point are labelled “haters”.
Complete nonsense and tells me the person using language in this way has no idea what it would feel like to be the recipient of actual hatred.

Yes perhaps the government should pay for unlimited IVF for infertile couples. It would be an investment in the future and the children produced will pay for themselves eventually as taxpayers, wealth generators and pension payers.

We have a shortage of children. I don't care if you have loads of savings, you will still need workers in the future to spend your savings on, otherwise it's just monopoly money. By not having them, you are getting a great deal out of life. That's fine. But paying tax to help mothers/children, and which ultimately helps you a lot too, when unlike the mothers you are doing pretty much none of the work, is a real boon for you.

Should the government pay for infertile people to have endless IVF in order to try and produce children eventually?
Or should infertile people just be grateful they're "doing none of the work" that mothers are doing?

Stupid and ignorant post.
Take some time to look at the list of topics this site has outside of parenting then come back and respond.

I was on the Maternity pay thread. I’m a mum of 2 young kids and have received maternity pay in recent years. I was happy with what I received (12/18 weeks full pay- then half pay for a few weeks- 2 private sector jobs).

I disagreed that women receiving 6 months full pay need to receive even more SMP, when added to child benefit, it’s one of the most generous benefits already (£180 per week). The OP on that thread is fully paid for 6 months and still wants more. She was pissed off that she is expected to contribute to fill the gap in earnings for the final months of maternity leave.

How does that make me a woman and child hater? I simply believe the couple need to save up and be financially responsible for part funding maternity leave by saving and budgeting to fill the gap. Even borrowing if needs be.

I said it was entitled to expect not to put your hand in your own pocket and there was a seeming lack of gratitude for women who are older than us who fought hard for enhanced maternity pay. We are benefiting from significantly enhanced maternity pay deals in many employers thanks to them.

I do however think the statutory minimum would be tough to get by on. But the OP and most of the posters talking about their mat pay were on full pay for 6 months so this does not apply.

I agree with you OP. It comes out in conversations about plane seats and working arrangements, especially Christmas. People without children are very full of "my rights" and "your lifestyle choice", but don't think about the welfare of children at all…

Surely in the matter of plane seats it should be parents looking out for the welfare of their children by paying to book seats together? Not doing so and then claiming people who have paid for their seats and won’t move don’t care about the welfare of your kids is not really on is it?

She didn't say it was... What you've done there is take a snippet of what she's said, added your own snippet from elsewhere and created a new sentence to discredit her whole paragraph to try to create an argument. So annoying when people do this.

Getting annoyed at parents who insist on not paying to book seats together and then expecting people to move who have paid extra is not like being racist.

I agree with you OP. It comes out in conversations about plane seats and working arrangements, especially Christmas. People without children are very full of "my rights" and "your lifestyle choice", but don't think about the welfare of children at all, and whatever choices you make (and having children is not always a choice, and shouldn't ever be compared to other lifestyle decisions - going ski-ing, getting a guinea pig....) you were once a child and benefitted from society making adjustments for you, so why not do your own bit now?
I think part of the problem is that these threads by mothers for mothers are dominated by a small group of people who say they don't "hate" mothers/children, but then are endlessly obsessed with never having to assist in any way. It's like the way people say they aren't racist, but just don't like funny religions or clothes or people not supporting England at cricket/football, or speaking a strange language to their children......yeah, they are not racist.
I'm not saying you can't hold some of these opinions and not hate mothers/children, but there are quite a few posters who are obsessed with saying these things. And they do hate mothers/children.

We have a shortage of children. I don't care if you have loads of savings, you will still need workers in the future to spend your savings on, otherwise it's just monopoly money. By not having them, you are getting a great deal out of life. That's fine. But paying tax to help mothers/children, and which ultimately helps you a lot too, when unlike the mothers you are doing pretty much none of the work, is a real boon for you.

I didn't see the thread on mat pay/leave - don't think it should be a year of full pay, but would support six months of that fwiw.

I'm unthreading myself from this, because I don't want all the vitriol.....

Most offenders I see have children old enough to not need a P:& C space. Some parents seem to view them as there for anybody with children under 18.