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AIBU?

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Original poster

It’s a wedding one…

64 replies

Montasaurus · 13/08/2024 21:36

AIBU in 2024 to expect a thank you card/message after attending a wedding/celebration event?

I have attended three weddings this year. One cost literally thousands of pounds for myself and my OH because it was abroad (as were the hen/stag celebrations) plus we gave a monetary gift too.

Only one of these wedding couples has sent a thank you card post event (not the abroad one). AIBU for saying this is basic manners to send a thank you card? Horrified.

OP posts:
Teenagerantruns · 14/08/2024 00:43

I sent my nephew money for his wedding,was small wedding abroad and l wasnt invited, not even a text to say thank you. That will be the last gift l send him.
Last year we attended the evening reception of some friends, put money in a card, again no thank you. I dont need a card, but a txt would fine.

Justwonderingifthisisnormal · 14/08/2024 00:40

We were waiting for our photographer to send our pics, then my dad died unexpectedly six months after the wedding and never got round to it. Had them ready to go at one point but just didn't seem right while grieving. Having said that, would never expect one as a guest.

Shawdee · 14/08/2024 00:28

If I received a thank you card it would be binned shortly after, a thank you in person is more than enough. Why do they need to repeat it in writing?

BettyBardMacDonald · 13/08/2024 21:46

TortillasAndSalsa · 13/08/2024 21:42

I am planning on sending personalised thank you cards but I need my photographer to send me my pictures first so I can carry out my plan

I'd rather get a prompt handwritten note. The photos delay proper thanks and just end up in the bin.

Kitkatcatflap · 13/08/2024 21:45

I think thank you cards for a wedding are a must but I do think people are sending less cards nowadays.

BraveFacesEveryone · 13/08/2024 21:44

We sent everyone a handwritten thank you card, and acknowledged gifts on that. We had to wait ages tho because lots of people (mostly family) wanted photos on them and we had to wait for the photographer to send them.

Commonsenseisnotsocommon · 13/08/2024 21:42

A thank you card for your gift, yes but not for attendance. If being a stickler for detail you should be writing to thank them for the opportunity to share their day.

TortillasAndSalsa · 13/08/2024 21:42

I am planning on sending personalised thank you cards but I need my photographer to send me my pictures first so I can carry out my plan

Allfur · 13/08/2024 21:41

Montasaurus · 13/08/2024 21:36

AIBU in 2024 to expect a thank you card/message after attending a wedding/celebration event?

I have attended three weddings this year. One cost literally thousands of pounds for myself and my OH because it was abroad (as were the hen/stag celebrations) plus we gave a monetary gift too.

Only one of these wedding couples has sent a thank you card post event (not the abroad one). AIBU for saying this is basic manners to send a thank you card? Horrified.

I see weddings abroad, as lovely mini breaks and do not begrudge the money at all, and dont worry about thank you cards

RosesAndHellebores · 13/08/2024 21:40

Thank you card for the gift is non negotiable.

DinnaeFashYersel · 13/08/2024 21:39

Thank you cards are a thing of the past for most people.

The rest are raging.

Fifthtimelucky · 13/08/2024 21:38

Sapphire387 · 13/08/2024 21:37

I would expect a thank you for the gift... not especially for the attendance.

I agree. The bride and groom should thank anyone who gave them a wedding present (whether or not they attended the wedding).

HollyGolightly4 · 13/08/2024 21:37

It infuriates me when thank you cards aren't sent! I just think it's the height of bad manners. However, I once waited a year for a card!

(thank you for gift, not attendance)

Sapphire387 · 13/08/2024 21:37

I would expect a thank you for the gift... not especially for the attendance.