Behind every sports success is a pushy parent. Aibu to agree?

I presume those who push their children might have high achieving children/teens but once the young person's own motivations come more into play, they might well give up the sport. The level of Olympic athletes etc, the person's motivation has got to come from them.

I was county level at 6 different athletic events as well as on my county netball team. My parents couldn't have been less interested.

I think having saying you need a "pushy parent" is wildly over simplifying.

My DC represented GB as an 17/18yo.
No amount of any parent pushing would have gotten them there-they had to want to be there and put in the graft-both mental and physical.

But yes- there is a huge amount of parental contribution to get them there-incredibly early starts, driving, feeding, buying kit etc etc involved.
Lots of expense and sacrifice. Which I think is different than pushing.

It is supporting.
Family holidays missed (by their choice) and holidays booked round their competition. Proms missed. Family events such as weddings missed.

By the time my DC was 17 the only person that could have driven this was them.
No amount of "pushing" from us would have made any difference.
If anything it would have put them off and I saw a number of athletes fall by the wayside as they lost interest or resented being pushed.

There are some that are pushy. Usually the child is playing a sport they did or do and have become a vicarious outlet. There some high profiles that fit this, but we shouldn't name.
But the vast majority are just very supportive and make sacrifices, often to the detrement of the siblings, to give them every opportunity and pay for expert coaching. I know an elite teen swimmer from a completely non swimming background. The parents are at the pool 5.30am 5 days a week. At competitions weekends. Shop and cook specific diets, use AL for Euro competitions and are active members of the swimming administration. They never pushed anything but make huge sacrifices in time and money.

My son is an elite sportsman.

Ime the kids that achieve young have parents who are pushy. Whether they push and that's why they start young and excel young or they do well and parents become pushy -I don't know. I think I've seen both from looking from the outside.

These kids often burn out and quit.

My ds had severe MH struggles at a young age and I encouraged him to find activities he enjoyed and not worry about trying to follow a particular path. He choose his sport as loved it and also we found him a school with pastoral care.

I supported him to do what he wanted and always said he wasn't on a journey without stations - he can get off and choose a different direction.

But he loves his sport. He was always behind others his age and came up through the ranks slower. But as they've all left he's continued and become pretty good at it.

I obviously support him 100% - but I don't and won't "push". It's his thing. If he does it it's got to be because he wants too.

But if pushy parent means getting up at 4am to take them training and driving around the country to competitions then o definitely meet the criteria 😂

I’m constantly told I’m a pushy parent. I make sure my son has a good balance between extra-curriculars (Beavers, bouldering and generally being outside which is great for mental health) and academics. For example over the summer holidays we are doing about an hour a day, most days, practicing spellings, times tables and handwriting, as well as reading aloud and independently. He can earn extra screen time for doing this and it’s never a battle. He has complex
disabilities but is cognitively very able.

I don’t see this as pushy, I see it as supporting my child to become the best he can be and to open up doors to him. Given the option he would happily spend all day every day on screens, but he is 7 and that’s not the life I want for him. He's heavily involved in community projects and has been nominated for two really incredible awards this year, which is helping him to understand that amazing feeling of accomplishment when you work hard.

I also make sure he has plenty of down time, he’s practicing meditation and breathing techniques, he’s learning the importance of rest. Funnily enough I’m not called pushy for encouraging those 🤔

Not necessarily pushy, but dedicated. DS is in a national league team for his sport so not elite but decent level. He only got into it in Y7 and is completely his choice, but it takes a lot of dedication from us as parents in terms of time, money, sacrificing family days for games, holidays for training camps etc.

Yes, I don't think it's a pushy parent that a child needs at all - it's a supportive one who is prepared to put in the time and effort and sacrifices required.

One of my friends has a pre-teen child who is an exceptional footballer. He isn't at all a pushy parent and neither is his partner, but as a family they spend huge amounts of time taking their child to training, tournaments, away games (although he's really young, he's at a level where away games can be a few hours' drive away) etc and they've had to sacrifice spending on other things to pay for a lot of the stuff he needs, training camps etc. And there's obviously the emotional support side of it too. They're not pushing him but they're giving up a lot to support him.

Behind every/most ‘greater depth’ Primary student is an ‘interested’ parent. Too many assume ‘natural’ giftedness alone in the UK.

I haven’t read the article, but I think some people who become elite athletes were restless children with incredibly supportive parents who helped them channel their energies constructively, instead of thinking of them as a pain in the backside and getting angry with them. High maintenance children.