To say no to 16year olds flying alone

Surely if you're with them until the last possible moment at this end, and their dad meets them at the other end, there's not really anything that can go wrong? It's not like they can get off at the wrong stop in the middle of the atlantic and being on a plan is about the most "adult supervision" a pair of teenagers could have without their parents being around. It would be different if they had to do slightly more complicated things like catch connecting flights or get themselves to / from airports.

Do they feel confident and comfortable with the arrangement? If so, yes, let them go.

My concern would be 'baddies'. But they're together, strength in numbers.

We’ll do e, OP. You’re absolutely doing the right thing by letting them go. The most important thing is that they leave plenty of time at the airport. They can’t go wrong!

I would feel anxious too but you need to bury that down and be happy and enthusiastic about the fabulous trip they have in store. They will be fine.

Your fears are not their fears

You would not be a good parent if you stopped them from doing something just because you have a fear around it

They are nearly adults, you won’t be able to control what they do or don’t do forever. So best to start cutting those ties now before they escape them on their own

I would let you them. I flew alone at 15 and I was nervous but it was very confidence boosting. And they have each other.

Why what do you think will happen? Why is it an issue?

Won't add to the voices as agree with them.

But just wanted to say how nice it is for a poster on AIBU to come back and accept the verdict gracefully and with such a response.

I hope they have a great time and you don't have too much anxiety once they arrive!

I remember my first flight alone aged 18 and how absolutely wonderful it felt to be navigating the world on my own! They will 100% be fine. Let them go.

Whatever you do, don't cry/worry when you wave them off at the airport. Look & act confident, tell them what a fantastic time they'll have & you can't wait to hear all about it when they come back. Imagine being 16 with an amazing trip to NY to enjoy! Wow! Well done for not letting your worries spoil it for them. They need to do these things to learn resilience. You're a great mum.

My DD travelled alone, via Amsterdam, a few days after her 16th birthday. Flight was delayed and she missed her connecting flight. She managed to navigate it all alone and got there in one piece.

For twins and a scheduled flight I’d have zero hesitation allowing it!

They will be absolutely fine. Especially since their dad will also pick them up.

Airport staff will be aware they are young and flying without an adult.

They will look out for them.

Ensure they have battery packs for their phones, money on cards and keep their passports safe.

They can do this if they really want to.

Think how they’ll feel when they’ve achieved this?

Stop panicking and getting yourself in a tizz, which is of no help to your kids.

We all feel that Mum Worry when our kids set out to do something on their own for the first time.

Our job is to be constructive. You will presumably say goodbye to them as they join the queue for security. Calmly make sure they have boarding passes and passports handy but in a secure place.

Remind them to keep checking for their departure gate, and go when they see it come up: some gates can be a long long walk.

Make sure they have paper and on-phone details. Scan passport and visa.

But do all this calmly and logically, supporting their confidence. Be positive and constructive.

And then let them get on with it.

Do not be sending endless txt messages throughout the journey: they need to be concentrating on what they are doing, not pulling out their phone every 10 mins to calm you down.

Change your dynamic: his best to support their growing independence rather than how to not be anxious. Your anxieties should not be their concern.

As everyone has has said, they will be fine and love the experience.

my 16 yo has just done a Europe flight alone, to meet me, with a changeover etc. first time, I was really nervous so I appreciate your anxiety.

But they will be fine. They can stay in touch with you every step of the way except on thr flight itself, where they will watch movies, be served meals, feel like adults.

so it’s time to swallow your feelings, wave them off bright and breezily, tell them to send you a quick text at each step - checked in, through departures, at the gate, in their seats, through immigration etc - then pour a glass of wine and pat yourself on the back for having raised such competent, adventurous kids.

I would be anxious about this. I too hate flying, airports etc. I understand your anxiety.

However, I would let my 17 yo do it.

I would absolutely let them go. 16 is a great age to start.
It's very easy - you take them to the airport and be there for check in.
Say goodbyes, they walk through security, find the gate and text you when they are in at the gate.
8 hrs later, they land. They collect luggage, go through US arrivals and Dad collects. JFK can have long arrivals queues so it may be better to go to Newark or even via Dublin but either way - let them go.

Let them go. Don't pass on your fears or insecurities on to them. Make them confident about going out in to the world. They will be fine. More than fine. And they're not even alone. They have each other.

let them go it is a rite of passage. If you refuse then you are infantilizing them

YANBU to be anxious about them flying. Of course you are, you’re a caring mum. It can be challenging, finding their way through the terminal, getting to the gate on time etc. and particularly difficult if there are any travel disruptions.

However this could be a great experience for them. Learning to manage those situations and building their resilience along the way.
And it’s great that they have each other for support.

another vote for letting them go

Children younger than 16 are permitted to fly alone. I think the age minimum age is 12-14, depending on the airline. Any younger, then they need a chaperone and the chaperone must be over the age of 16.

So if your DC are 16 and old enough ro be chaperones, they're definitely old enough to fly alone. But as you know, they're not even alone, they have each other.

My DS14 and a friend recently did a similar trip unaccompanied. These two are the most disorganized, forgetful pair of lovable idiots you could ever meet and they were absolutely fine.
Pretty sure most 16 year old girls are more switched on and capable.

Yes, YABU.