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AIBU?

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Original poster

To be annoyed DH won't do more to avoid COVID to ensure IVF goes smoothly

138 replies

PhillipaN · 12/08/2024 22:00

Just about to start our second round of IVF after taking a break for the summer and I'm terrified that I'm hearing about more and more cases of COVID: sister in law, friend, husband's friend, colleague etc. There's research to say it impacts sperm for 3-6mo and I just can't face delaying IVF and having to wait longer.
Sadly DH loves his social life too much, says it's silly to shield and plans to go to a concert and a football match in the next couple of months.

OP posts:
Apolloneuro · 12/08/2024 22:23

Speak to the ivf clinic and get official advice. Then take it from there good luck with your ivf.

Original poster
PhillipaN · 12/08/2024 22:21

@HemelHan

and surely you are just as likely to catch Covid from Jill at the office as a rando at a concert?

I suppose my logic there is that say there's 100 people in the office in his proximity / on his floor / people who will come close to him. Let's say (numbers used just for explanations' sake, unlikely to be actual accurate probabilities) that 5% of people have Covid. That's 5 people with COVID around him who could in theory infect him.

Going to a concert with 5,000 people. 5% x 5,000 = 250. 250 people to infect him. And ok, they're not all going to come up to him but they're in the same building as him, queueing at the same bars etc. Seems a higher probability of catching it here.

OP posts:
HemelHan · 12/08/2024 22:19

how is your husband coping through IVF? If his social life is keeping him going that’s surely going to be much better in the long run than him being stressed and ruminating on things. I would say if his social life is getting him through it that’s going to be a more positive impact despite the risk, even if the Covid/sperm thing is true

HavingABitOfAMare · 12/08/2024 22:18

Totally unreasonable.

What has your consultant said?

berksandbeyond · 12/08/2024 22:17

I think you if you’re this anal about things now, parenthood is going to be very difficult for you. You need to let some things go

Whatatodo79 · 12/08/2024 22:16

Of all the stresses and awfulness of IVF, I would try hard not to create extra ones for each other. I don't think COVID will be a problem for you both here. Best of luck

LoneHydrangea · 12/08/2024 22:15

Is anyone shielding from Covid? I think you’re being massively unreasonable. If you’re going to get it, you’ll get it.

Edingril · 12/08/2024 22:15

Yes the idea is insane

GoldieFurEverywhere · 12/08/2024 22:15

You want your husband to avoid crowds?
On the off chance he might get Covid?
Which has the small possibility of affecting his swimmers?

I know IVF is all consuming, but read this back. YABU. And controlling.

HemelHan · 12/08/2024 22:13

Yeah YABU - what does your consultant say about it?

IVF is shit but life does go on and you can’t pause your entire existence in case something affects sperm when you don’t even know this is true. If he was refusing to stop using the jacuzzi fair enough but you can’t expect him to not go anywhere.

and surely you are just as likely to catch Covid from Jill at the office as a rando at a concert?

Changingplace · 12/08/2024 22:11

What has your specialist says about this? I don’t think anyone is shielding from Covid these days are they? And if people that close to you have had it you’re just as likely to pick it up from someone you know as at a big concert etc.

Original poster
PhillipaN · 12/08/2024 22:10

Pacificisolated · 12/08/2024 22:08

YABU. You should speak to your fertility specialist and find out what their recommendation is. I doubt they expect you or your DH to shield.

Not even to the extent of avoiding events with crowds?
Ie go to the office, see your parents, have a lunch with a mate who 100% feels ok but not a concert with thousands of people!

OP posts:
Pacificisolated · 12/08/2024 22:08

YABU. You should speak to your fertility specialist and find out what their recommendation is. I doubt they expect you or your DH to shield.

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