To be worried about boyfriend’s work ethic?

Can you afford a pet that big?

Why do you think he's not getting good feedback at work? His bosses probably see his laziness/poor performance & are rightly calling him out. Starting his own business will be a joke, he'll fail quicker than you can blink. But it won't be his fault, he'll blame something else. It takes loads & loads of time, long hours, effort, energy etc to start a business and keep it afloat.

So yes, you absolutely should be worried about his poor work ethic! Unless you are happy to scrounge forever & not live comfortably with nice things. Financially it will all fall on you. I'd be running from this relationship.

AIBU to be worried about this?

Very!

I'd get rid of him. It's multiple jobs, which suggests the problem is him.

And if he's highly intelligent, he will always struggle to feel properly appreciated. A recipe for a lifetime of resentment.

Just perhaps you could see how the new business idea goes. Perhaps that's really him. If not then I'd cut your losses now.

This guy would be the worst SAHP. Kids in front of a screen all day and eating junk. Please do not have children with this man.

He's lazy and has no ethics. LTB. It won't get better

Oh op, if he’s late 20s then he needs to spend most of the next 40 years working. Don’t sign up to being part of that shitshow with this guy. And even if he were stably employed and didn’t hate his boss, the whole taking time as much time off as you can- a week for a cold? 2 weeks off when the doctor says he’s fine to work?? If I were his manager or colleague I’d have mentally written him off.

if you had moved in, the thing to do would be to say I will support you to spend a couple evenings and part of each weekend on your business plan. I don’t support you to quit your job because you have a business plan. Stick with your job and also get this plan going.

I married that laziest man on the planet and then proceeded to have three children with him. Until one day he told me he didn't want to be responsible for a family anymore. And now he's not. Learn from my mistakes.

Please don’t commit to him. If he is lazy at work, he will be lazy in other areas (mental load/physical load etc.). Only found this out after many years together and countless redundancies/not passing probations/job changes and it is always someone else’s fault. But only one common denominator. Never out of a job as highly qualified in a wanted profession but it is very disheartening. There are other issues at play, but it is the unwillingness to accept that the problem lies with him.

Out of interest per year what are the acceptable amount of days off

Don't marry him, move in with him, have kids with him or entangle yourself financially with him in anyway. He is definitely not a potential partner/husband/father. He is lazy, unreliable and work-shy and you'd have a miserable life.

Doing the bare minimum in a job you hate and pulling sickies is not the biggest crime on earth.

There are worse crimes I give you that but a person who does this is not worthy of respect and has different values from the OP.

Would give me the ick

My ex was like this. Constantly late, doing less than the bare minimum. Turns me right off.

It sounds like you’re not suited to each other, sorry. 😔

I don’t think either of you are unreasonable though, just different, and it’s a difference that can’t really be overcome in a relationship.

Maybe he just hasn’t found the right job yet?

If his attitude with work is like this I’m not sure he’ll cut it as a parent. You could imagine him thinking; well, the kids are really annoying me today so I’m not looking after them at all and I’ll just do my own thing. In fact I might just quit being a dad and leave…
I think you could be anxious and frustrated long-term if you stay with someone whose work life seems to be built on shifting sand.

I'd let this one go.

Doing the bare minimum in a job you hate and pulling sickies is not the biggest crime on earth.
But if he doesn't want to work hard then he probably won't be very ambitious or driven and therefore will probably not increase his earning power very quickly.
Or, he could change jobs to one he loves and actually wants to put the effort in.
I'd say right now it doesn't look like he's ready for the responsibility of kids. That could change, but life is short.
If you are then maybe it's time to say sayonara.

How I loathe people who think life without work is an option. Any work - earn your keep. Get rid of him.

You will rue the day you ever met him.

This is one of those core values things. I genuinely think relationship success comes from sharing the same core values. I would proceed with caution, or just not proceed.

Not a good start. Do not rush in.

Sorry OP but this likely not to change and I’d think seriously about moving in with him. It could be extremely draining living with someone like that and I for one would not do it!

This has just reminded me of my exH. We were together throughout uni and the first 4-5 years of our working lives. He hated every job he was in, his bosses were all unreasonable etc. He was very intelligent and had an impressive CV so he got jobs easily then. I think he couldn't adapt from uni where his professors loved him to just working and failing at basic tasks.

I was very sympathetic for years, helped him out, supported him, until the anger started being directed at me. Suddenly he felt it was my fault he was in these horrible jobs because I wanted a mortgage and kids and I was a "workaholic" so he felt pressure from me apparently. Lol. It was confusing and very damaging to my self esteem, bending over backwards to be extra nice to a man who was always miserable when the topic of work came up. I could never say anything good about my job or my successes because it made him start talking about how shit his job was! He could never be happy for my success. He also really wanted to start his own business, he thought that was the way out. Luckily I got out of there before he used up all my money.