To think you ought to tidy to a reasonable basic standard before people come to view your house?

I really resent anyone trying to impose their laidback attitude on me so I’m annoyed on your behalf! Even if it’s fine to show your home when it’s messy, he’s ignoring your feelings.

But why wouldn’t he want to make it as nice as possible? The sooner an offer is made, the sooner he won’t have to worry about viewings.

Bless the enthusiastic helpers ❤️

As PP's have said ask the kids to put everything on the bed (unless it's DH's dirty skiddies)
If there is any of their stuff then they take it to their rooms and put it away (although why there would be I don't understand).
Put your own stuff away and put all DH's stuff in bin bags and put it outside by the bins.

I don't actually know how you can relax and sleep well in a shit tip. You are both at fault here for letting it get that bad. But you are pregnant and poorly so can possibly be excused. Your DH on the other hand is a dick.

If there are any of his dirty skiddies then I would leave them on full display and send him a photo so he can see what the viewers will see and then tell him him that's why it won't sell.

Did you tidy up for the photographs?

Agree you should ditch the lazy husband, sell the property and run off with the profit.

It's just pure laziness on his part. He'd be happy if you did it; he just doesn't want to do it himself.

And of course if he went to buy a house that was a mess he would be critical of that.

We attempted to view a house that was so messy we couldn't do more than poke our heads into some rooms. We obviously didn't buy that house. It doesn't need to be a spotless blank canvas but it does need to be clean and tidy. Just shoving stuff into cupboards is sufficient.

This. Would be totally off putting.

Yeah, you know the answer to this one. He's being a dick. Your kids sound adorable though.

Clearing today is about stashing stuff, not necessarily actually sorting it. Use pillow cases or supermarket shopping bags, stuff into car boot or wardrobe.

Sell it, take your half of the money and LTB.

does he want to sell?

This is what I think. I have various hidey holes for e.g. pile of paperwork, DD's clutter of hair clips etc

The OP says 'I'm not talking about making it look show-home perfect, I'm talking about making it look like a reasonably tidy and welcoming, albeit lived-in home.'

She is already meeting in the middle while her husband isn't willing to compromise.

OP, obviously YANBU. Making sure the house looks reasonably tidy and clean for viewings is one of the most basic house-viewing rules there is.

Stuff on the floor, in particular, is a no-no - people need to be able to walk around the room they're viewing! Your husband is mad to think he can leave clothes all over the bedroom floor and expect potential buyers to pick their way across his discarded socks and pants just to get around the place.

One of the houses we looked at when we were buying was really untidy and cluttered, and yes, obviously when you buy a place the previous owner's clutter won't be there. But DP and I (who are not even particularly tidy people) both said that we just couldn't actually get a real sense of what the house was like because of the messiness of it. There were clothes piled up in the corners of the master bedroom and stuff all over the bedside tables and dressing table, and there were kids' toys all over the floor in the living area and piles of paperwork and old magazines on the sofa, and a bike in the hallway. We couldn't even really get a feel for how big the rooms were. Plus, it made us think that the if the vendors were careless and disorganised about the house for viewings, they would be equally careless and disorganised about the sale process and probably wouldn't have maintained the property that well.

A bit lived-in is fine! I wouldn't expect it to look like a show home or presented for a magazine shoot. I wouldn't be put off by a couple of mugs on the draining board or a few bits on the coffee table or toys on the kids' beds or anything. Of course people can't keep everything pristine all the time! But stuff chucked on the floor is a bit much.

That’s why our house is now devoid of any personal stuff. Boxes in the loft that was previously empty, photos hidden in drawers and cupboards, bathroom cleared of everything but towels, posh shower gel and posh hand soap. I’m so over it now, it’s been going on for what feels like forever.

I think we’re at the point of giving up.

To be honest play him at his own game. Don’t clean it. Let the viewers make their own decision. If it’s rejected then his fault.

We are also selling ours, for viewings I always make sure the house is clean, tidy and smelling nice. If it is a first viewing you can get away with chucking stuff in the wardrobe but on second viewings they are more likely to want to look in built in wardrobes, cupboards etc.

Get the children to pick up everything and shove it in a bin bag for you, shove that somewhere out of sight. That will do for today.

Yes, definitely tidy and clean! Spent a while on this at the weekend and then the people didn't turn up which is so infuriating. I would say pack away anything you don't need and store in loft/cupboard/car etc to make sure the task is easier to stay on top of for multiple viewings. So much of our stuff is away that the tidying isn't too bad

Most people should be able to see beyond the mess and clutter. However, we still rember the very messy and cluttered house we saw when we were house hunting. They were a family of 2 adults and 2 kids and we were the same but our kids were babies. It just highlighted the lack of workable storage for me. I tried to imagine what we could do differently but couldn't get away from the fact that a lot of the solutions I would have come up with they had already employed and it wasn't enough. We would have outgrown that house quickly.

I do think a house should be clean, tidy and presentable before viewings. I would get a cleaner in if you can afford to.

Ad for your dh's behaviour, that is a whole other thread.

It needs to be clean and tidy. Why did he agree to sell if he was too lazy to do the work involved? He assumes a heavily pregnant wife will do his share as well as her own? Pathetic of him.

Of course a basic standard or cleanliness and tidiness is required. Beyond that, you might go to more or less effort depending on things like the type of property etc, but there is certainly a minimum standard for letting people in.

Once I viewed a house with dog shit on the carpet. It was about 10am and the people who lived there were still in bed, poor dog probably hadn’t been let out and couldn’t wait any longer. It’s not really the way to sell a house.

You're heavily pregnant and unwell. Even if you weren't trying to sell, he should be doing it anyway to make it nicer for you!

(But yes, for viewings it should definitely be clean and tidy)

With regard to enlisting your kids - tactic for you. I have a 9 and 7 year old.
Stick music on, set a timer for 1 minute. See who can pick up the most items and put them on the bed in 1 minute. Winner gets to choose the soundtrack and how long the next timer is. the short time and competition element will keep them focussed.

Once everything on the bed, get each child to remove what’s theirs. Now it’s on the bed, you’ll find it easier to put other things away.

(The above is also fairly effective with husbands)

Depends on the vibe of the house you are selling surely.

If you are selling a doer upper that is a wreck then it is fine IMO.

If you are selling a finished house ready to move into with hi spec decoration etc then probably not.

Remember the capacity of the floordrobe is a valuable detail some people need to know.

It’s definitely him. Apart from selling the house, he really couldn’t spend 30 minutes tidying up the bedroom when his wife is pregnant and would struggle to do it? Bet it’s all his shit anyway.
However - it wouldn’t stop me liking or buying a house. I can see past mess, although a lot of people can’t.

Visiting a home that was a mess would potentially put me off buying.

If someone can't be bothered to clear the floor so that it's visible then what else are they neglecting? I'd be thinking of damp/mould issues etc.

I think cleaning is more important than tidying. I can see beyond (for example) stuff piled up on bookshelves, but if the kitchen and the bathroom are filthy that would really put me off (not least because it would suggest that the current owners had not maintained the house).