To think you ought to tidy to a reasonable basic standard before people come to view your house?

I viewed a nice house once that had, in the master bedroom, a pair of jeans on the floor next to the (made) bed - they were crumpled and rumpled as if they'd been shoved down her legs into denim pools before the wearer stepped out of them to continue her day. The gusset of her pink knickers was prominently visible within the jeans.

I didn't make an offer but mainly because they also had an illegal (no building regs) loft conversion. YANBU

I don't think the OP's house is filthy, just a bit messy. That's never put me off. I can always tell what's going with the vendor.

The idea is to make your home as attractive as possible to attract buyers, so, yes, I would make it look nice.🤷‍♀️

Having bought and sold many houses over the years, I would not consider buying a filthy house. It would indicate to me that maintenance might not have been done, since the two so often go together.

I always made sure our houses were spotless and smelled good when potential buyers were coming, and yes, I did it while working and raising children. It's difficult but certainly not impossible.

I think the general feeling is, an immaculate home is well taken care of. Less likely to have other issues if it's well cared for.

Why wouldn't you want your home to look it's best for selling? Laundry outside or thrown around the floor is all going with them, but it looks sloppy.

I'm not an estate agent but I'm in an industry where I'm often visiting homes that are up for sale or just sold and I never fail to be amazed by some people.
I went in one recently that was for sale and it had mouldy plates of food everywhere, dirty underwear hanging around and generally stank. I don't expect houses to be pristine for me but I think it's polite to at least have a quick once over.

A messy house is a red flag for me when looking to buy. I think if people can't be bothered to tidy, then they probably can't be bothered to do maintenance to the home either.

I once viewed a house that was a complete tip, there was an enormous dog in the garden which had done an enormous crap outside the house. The garden was shoulder height nettles with a shipping container in it and the finishing touch was going into one of the bedrooms and finding a couple in bed!

The do-er uper will prob have bigger problems, so you're looking at something cheaper with the view of investing in it. If you're buying something that's effectively good-to-go then, and I could be wrong, it basically has to be as close to perfect as you can make it (obviously you can't do everything!). So certainly wash up, clothes away, made beds, clean, nice smell etc. And even I was selling I made cheap touch ups so it looked as good as possible. There's articles about it. People don't want to sidestep a pile of trainers etc

Does he not want to sell the house? Sounds like laziness and selfishness to me.

If it's his stuff on the floor get the kids to put it in bin bags and then put it in the shed /garage / his car/ the wheelie bin....on repeat until he deals with it.

I’m guilty of lacking imagination and whilst washing on the floor isn’t exactly or should be a deal breaker, it still sends a message to me that the owner is either over confident that their house will sell regardless or not that bothered or committed to selling anyway - both red flags about what they might be like to enter into a business deal with.

What difference does it make whether there is washing out, whether you’re buying a doer-upper or something you just plan to walk in to? The washing goes with the vendors…?

I made mine look really nice for viewings and did stuff like paint the front door/kitchen cupboards/put flowers out. It wasn't expensive, but a hard market and I think mine was the one that sold in a street of similar where 4 were on the market. Similarly I saw some where they looked messy - washing out etc. Fine if you're buying a doer-upper but if you aren't it makes a difference.

I appreciate what you’re saying, and it’s a view widely shared on here, but I’ve never found it to be the case myself. I’ve never made any particular effort unless it was a ‘difficult’ sale, or if we particularly wanted a quick sale, and we’ve sold for well above our asking price, plus we’ve bought dirty, messy houses. You’re at an advantage if you can see beyond mess, dirt, or an eccentric/dated/ghastly decor, and other people can’t.

The one time I made a significant alteration to a house I was selling was because I knew the type of person (aspirational lower-middle class with money) who would want to buy it, and that they wouldn’t take to there being laden bookshelves throughout. I took them all down, restored the walls, and stored the books while we sold. The type of person who would buy our current house would be very different.

Could you postpone the viewing until your DH is available to help tidy it up? Tell the estate agent that you are not well.

His 50% of equity in the divorce will be a bigger £ if he tidies up.

I’ll be honest, I personally haven’t got the imagination to see beyond clutter. I find mess very distracting when I’ve been viewing property and see why house builders spend so much on show homes and styling. Other posters are so right, when you present a house, you’re selling a lifestyle. Buyers want to imagine themselves relaxing in a calm living room or preparing food in an efficient kitchen with plenty of preparation space. Bearing in mind how much estate agents charge for minimal work, I’m surprised they don’t give people a bit more direct feedback.

I also find it hard to understand how someone can be messy - but clean. To me, to clean anything properly you need to move it completely to have access. There is no way someone is going to move everything off a completely covered kitchen work surface, wipe it down and then put it all back surely? I’ve looked around homes with dishwashers, yet the sink has been full of washing up. Just shove it all in the machine until your viewers have been, likewise piles of dirty washing.

You have my total sympathy. If your DH is keen to sell, he should be pulling his weight in its presentation. Remind him that so many of these property programs show that you don’t need to spend thousands, just a deep clean, strategic furniture arranging and a fresh smell is sometimes all that is needed. It’s a pain having to be fanatical about tidiness when you’re selling, but it’s hopefully only short term and once you’re in your dream home, you can chill and relax!

Does you DH actually want to move? I've read that sometimes people leave their houses in a state because they don't want them to sell.

I understand your other half’s point of view- why make extra effort for total strangers if you all can’t be bothered to make the effort for yourselves?

Because they're not trying to sell their own house to themselves?

The point of having the house clean and tidy for viewings is simply to show it to its best advantage to someone you're hoping will be persuaded to give you hundreds of thousands of pounds for it.

We are in the process of moving, both our house and the house we are buying were immaculate for photo's and viewings! I have pets and kids so it was bloody hard going even though it is always pretty clean and tidy anyway, I definitely went the extra mile!!
I had a post on here a while ago when we were viewing properties about some of the shit tips we looked at, my 'favourite' was the one with holes punched in every door and dirty dishes piled up in the sink.....I've just looked and it is still on the market 6 months later.
Obviously people can look past your possessions but why wouldn't you want the best chance of getting the best price for your biggest asset?
Bare minimum in my opinion is tidied, thoroughly cleaned, all windows opened for a few hours for freshness, new fluffy towels in the bathroom (unless yours are already pristine of course). I also changed the beds into fresh linens to avoid that 'slept in' smell in the bedroom, I stripped the sofas and washed the sofa covers to freshen it up as well.
The number of houses we looked at with crumbs everywhere in the kitchen was unbelievable, it would be a 2 minute job to wipe up but they didn't......doesn't bode well for bigger jobs so it put us off as it made the homeowners seem lazy and uninterested in the maintenance of their property.
The house we are buying was beautifully clean, tidy and smelled gorgeous!

My 14 yo is still like this. Just yesterday he was asked to help by sweeping up the fallen berries at the side of the house. He swept them up beautifully but then had a pile of large red berries to pelt at the fence.
Which now needs jet washing.
And I'm not prepared to let him loose on that.......

easily solved by saying "make your bed and put your laundry in the basket" instead of "tidy your room"

When I had my flat valued I was very late getting home from work and had only tidied the top half. I'm pretty messy but not filthy - the estate agent changed his estimate by £10,000 after seeing both halves. That tells me it matters.

When you sell a house you sell a lifestyle.

You make it harder to make that new life attractive because people can't imagine themselves living in someone else's clutter.

They want to be able to imagine their life in your home.

He's abdicating responsibility for some reason. Maybe because he doesn't want to move, or he can't cope with the process of tidying and throwing things out or because he's lazy.

Regardless, you will find it harder to sell and that will affect how much you sell for, and then the future you have.

If someone said put £10,000 in the bin or tidy the kitchen what's the response you give? Cos that's what he's doing.