To think I will always have financial stress now others have pointed this out?

I'm 46 and about a million times worse off than you. Please do take a look at how secure you really are, and be grateful.

£200 a month for the next 12 years at a 5% interest rate will give you almost £40k for her which is an incredible gift and far more than most people will give their child at 18. Assume you have it in an ISA so don’t need to pay tax on it.

Sounds like you’re doing pretty well?

You have a home you own. Only owe £190k. You have savings for dds uni or home or whatever. Salary is good.

The only bad thing that stood out to me was skipping meals, which you shouldn’t be doing!!! Absolutely no need for that whatsoever

MSE has a good mortgage overpayment calculator. Have a play around with it. You might be surprised how much impact overpaying £200 a month would have. You can always downsize to fund uni as others have said, but plenty of students don't have parental help.

How much is your employer putting into your pension? When did you start paying in and what percentage of your salary?

You are in a much better position than many, lots of equity, one dependent, savings and a good wage. Saving for uni at this stage is not needed, downsize or over pay the mortgage. And make sure you don’t go without food. We are a family of four with a wage of 44k and I consider us to be lucky and managing well

If you save £200 a month for the next 12 years at 7% interest (in a stocks and shares ISA) you will have over £45000. It won't cover uni entirely but it's a decent start for a kid!

Print out your post and stick it on the fridge door, and every time you feel a surge of self pity surfacing, read it out loud. You’re very (very!) lucky in what you have. Be thankful. Many don’t have a fraction of what you have.

I never saved for my DD, I couldn't afford to, I worked full time, mortgage, single parent etc.
My DD has not suffered.
She had a DM who did her best and she understands that.
DD worked and saved, she has two degrees that she obtained whilst holding down a full time job, now has a career that pays more than I ever earned, she's married with a new baby and a mortgage and I now have paid off my mortgage and I'm in a position that I'm able to help a little financially.
In your position I'd downsize, you could have no mortgage with your equity, it's crazy that you go without eating for a few days to save for something that may never happen (Uni)
At 6 she's not going to be traumatised by moving to a smaller home in another area.
Think how much easier your life would be with no mortgage, smaller home to maintain, lower utility bills & some spare cash to enjoy life.

It's because the loan available is based on parental income and they literally suggest a parental contribution amount which makes you feel the government it expecting it but it's not a legal obligation.

But yes, it's very common for students to cover this amount themselves through work and probably even helpful to them getting jobs after graduation.

Stop savings for your dd, you can’t afford it and you are lowering the quality of her life now on the off chance you’ll give her a slightly better life as an adult. £20k isn’t enough for you to have as a buffer, any money left at the end of the month put in your own savings, you can give those to her at 18 if she needs it/you’ve not had to replace the car/boiler etc.

when will your mortgage be paid off? Is it reasonable to think by the time you are mid 50s you’ll be mortgage free? Then for the last decade of work you save the mortgage payment money towards your retirement on top of whatever pension you have.

My daughter is going to uni next year and I have 0 savings for her, I don’t own a house and I eat everyday. She’ll be fine, stop saying you’re struggling to make ends meet when you’re so fat from that it’s laughable

You're choosing not to eat meals for a few days at the end of the month. You have savings of 20k. That's just ridiculous and attention seeking behaviour.
Pretending to be poor and struggling to make ends meet it so offensive when there are plenty of people who are genuinely struggling.

No don’t uproot her now. You’re covering your costs and saving. You’re fine.

People are just pointing out that the money you put into your mortgage payments is saving because you could always sell that asset later. Or, when she’s at uni, rent her room and get additional income.

You’re in a much better position than you feel you are so stop panicking.

It could be so much worse op. Mumsnet can skew your perspective a bit because everyone here seems to be on £100k+ with a cleaner and a nanny but honestly you're doing alright.

Whilst putting 8% in pension contribution on a 53k salary let's not forget 🙄

My goodness, if this isn't a wind up you are not "struggling" - you are saving £300 a month, have 20k savings and equity of over £300k. Seriously have some perspective, you don't need to not eat, it's slightly offensive. Just save £50 a month less and eat beans on toast for the "starving days" if you are determined to save money over eating.

Your situation can change. At 48 I got a higher paying job and am now at 57 im able to stash some money for my daughter- she is 18 but plans to go to uni next year. She has also saved £15k herself so don't think they are helpless chicks you have to keep feeding.

Why do parents feel that they need to support their kids through uni? If you earn too much for them to get support then they take a gap year or two to work or get a job to support it when there. Amazes me that parents feel obliged to pay for it all, surely I'm not the only one? Let the adult that they will be work out how to pay for it like they'll need to for other things throughout life.

This is a ridiculous thread!

She can get a job to get her through uni

Kindly as possible, you need to calm the hell down 👇🏼

I agree with others re saving for uni. Your daughter needs to make her own plans when the time comes. I highly recommend actually getting a job after school and going to uni later once she figured out what it is she wants to study (and once she is no longer tied to your income when applying for a student loan). Not to mention, she can actually live at home when she studies.
My parents didn't have opportunity to save for me and rented their entire life, yet here I am at 40 with two self- funded degrees and a mortgage-free property of my own.
Missing meals on 54k when you have no childcare costs? How?

Use the £200 a month to buy food for goodness sake. It's nice to be able to save for your children, but if it means going without basics now for the sake of something like university which they might not even do its ridiculous. Have a really hard look at all of your outgoings, record every penny you spend for a month and then review, I suspect there's money somewhere that's draining without you realising.

With respect, you are being a being silly.

Overpay your mortgage as much as you can. Don't worry about saving for university right now. She can always get a part time job while at uni to support herself. Many students do that.

In the meantime, you are sitting on savings and going without meals. Overpay the mortgage, you'l pay less interest on it that way. And eat properly.

You can always downsize later too. You're actually in a really decent position. You just need to rethink your priorities.

If you choose to downsize now, don't worry about uprooting your child. Kids really do adjust to changes a lot better than adults. If you worry and show your fear she'l bounce off that. If you make it exciting like an adventure then that's what it will be to her too.

I hope you manage to figure it out.

This is ridiculous OP. You do realise you are considered wealthy compared to many people in the UK? For people who are really struggling to make ends meet your post is an insult. Some people have to cut down on meals so their children can eat and to pay bills. You have got savings so please don't compare your self with them.

I actually don’t think it’s crazy to think about university fees but that’s got to be a second priority to your quality of life right now.

My dc started doing small jobs for money age 10 and my 13 yo has saved more than £4000. They are really motivated to save for university and while they’re still young and don’t have the pressure of GCSEs/A levels I’m happy for them to be as entrepreneurial as they like!