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AIBU?

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Original poster

DP 's friends camping on our campsite

29 replies

supersop60 · 10/08/2024 16:14

DP, in his desire to 'help' and solve problems, has suggested to a friend of his (actually a friend of another friend) that he brings his family (DW and twin DS) to the campsite where we are going next week.
Friend (Bob) was due to travel abroad, but realised that DCs passports are out of date. My DP immediately rang him, saying it was a shame to lose their holiday etc and basically railroaded (imo) Bob into looking up the website while they were on the phone.
I have met the DW once. She is nice, but I'm looking forward to my family holiday with my DC, which is rare now they're 23 and 20. I wasn't expecting to factor in another family to our plans.
Quote from DP ' Bob and I can go cycling, and youve met Sally, she's nice'.
AIBU to want the holiday we've planned?

OP posts:
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Gymmum82 · 10/08/2024 21:39

I bet sally is fuming too. She had a week abroad in the sun to look forward to. Now she’s camping in Lyme Regis with strangers while her husband fucks off cycling and leaves her alone with the kids

mindutopia · 10/08/2024 21:28

Nope, I’d say he can go on his own with Bob and Sally and be the 3rd wheel and you can go somewhere else with your kids.

Dh has a habit of doing this. We once went on holiday about an hour away from BIL and partner. Said it would be nice to meet up with them at some point during the week.

Cue, day 2 BIL and partner showed up at our holiday cottage in their camper van and proceeded to stay in the van, using our bathroom, eating all meals with us (meals I bloody had to cook for now 6 people!) and joining all activities for the remaining 6 days of our holiday. I now refuse go on holiday anywhere in Wales because in theory it’s close enough for them to pop up and stay the whole f-ing time again!

Dh also has a habit of inviting people to visit us with no end date in sight. Last Christmas I had guests 2 days longer than planned because Dh said, they’ll stay til the day after Boxing Day. But is such a people pleaser that he just assumed this and never actually told them how long they could stay and then was just waiting around for them to decide they’d had enough of eating all our food and drinking all our drink and were ready to announce their departure date. I just stopped cooking or replenishing any food from the shop and made plans to ignore them all until they left. We are the only ones who ever host Christmas (for complicated family reasons), but after last year, I’m done. I can’t do it anymore.

CottonwoolCubes · 10/08/2024 21:21

Book somewhere else and grab another tent in the sale. Screw that for a game of soldiers.

Oblomov24 · 10/08/2024 21:04

I'd be furious. Dh wouldn't do something so stupid.

Original poster
supersop60 · 10/08/2024 20:53

Slight update. Bob has booked the campsite for tomorrow, so we'll only overlap for a few days. I made it clear to DP that I didn't want to do any activities together, or end up babysitting, and tbf to him, he said 'oh no neither do I, we don't know them well enough. We might do drinks one evening.'
So panic over.
Thanks for the replies!

OP posts:
Wendysfriend · 10/08/2024 19:33

Just get drunk all day. That way you can't babysit and you'll feel very happy about everything.

Justrolledmyeyesoutloud · 10/08/2024 19:27

Nourishinghandcream · 10/08/2024 17:20

But it's not just men.
My SIL has form for doing this exact type of thing.

Not just holidays but also arranging get togethers (not always at her house) and then telling people they HAVE to be there, what time, what to bring etc.

Show quote history

No sorry course it's not just men - but no way l would do this.

Idontgiveashitanymore · 10/08/2024 17:46

I would suggest just meeting later in the day as “ you have plans”

Nourishinghandcream · 10/08/2024 17:20

Justrolledmyeyesoutloud · 10/08/2024 16:32

Whu is always men thay do this??
My dh invited his best mate and wife on my dream holiday years ago and they came..it was fine but l was absolutely livid with him.

But it's not just men.
My SIL has form for doing this exact type of thing.

Not just holidays but also arranging get togethers (not always at her house) and then telling people they HAVE to be there, what time, what to bring etc.

gamerchick · 10/08/2024 17:10

No way would I be going to help with someone's younglings when mine are grown while my husband fucks off with his mate.

I'd seriously tell him that if he's changed the holiday to a lads holiday then you hope he has fun and you and your kids can do something else if they decide not to go.

Aquamarine1029 · 10/08/2024 17:06

This is like something out of the Twilight Zone. Who even does something like this? Is your partner generally quite thick?

needsomewarmsunshine · 10/08/2024 17:02

I'd wipe the floor, walls and ceiling with dh if he ever did this,

Original poster
supersop60 · 10/08/2024 16:58

I don't know if he's paid, or even booked. One sentence I overheard DP say was 'yes, Lyme Regis is nice, I suppose, but our place is great".
I'm hoping that Bob books Lyme Regis...that's easily 2 hours from us!

OP posts:
Original poster
supersop60 · 10/08/2024 16:58

I don't know if he's paid, or even booked. One sentence I overheard DP say was 'yes, Lyme Regis is nice, I suppose, but our place is great".
I'm hoping that Bob books Lyme Regis...that's easily 2 hours from us!

OP posts:
ginasevern · 10/08/2024 16:52

Yep, you'll be de facto babysitter. Or at the very least spending a lot more time in the company of young twins than you would care to especially as your kids are adults. You'll also be expected to get on like a house on fire with Sally because, you know, you're both women. Has Bob paid for the holiday yet?

Azerothi · 10/08/2024 16:49

Sounds like all three of them have set you up as a babysitter for the twins.

Olympia777 · 10/08/2024 16:49

Sounds fine, cba with all that 'livid' nonsense 🤷‍♀️

Delphiniumandlupins · 10/08/2024 16:45

If Bob and Sally are nice people they're not going to want this either. If they're disorganised enough to book a foreign holiday without checking passports I'm not sure I would want to holiday with them!

pictoosh · 10/08/2024 16:43

Like HELL would I accept having mere acquaintances foisted on my week long holiday.
Fuck off your dh. What a twat!

IamtheDevilsAvocado · 10/08/2024 16:42

I'd be livid if I was railroaded into a completely different holiday without discussing it....

Fuckitydoodah · 10/08/2024 16:40

I'd be unimpressed if my DH did this. You want a chilled out family holiday, doing as you please. Not having to make polite chit-chat with these people, and potentially having to include them in your plans. I bet Sally feels the same - a nice foreign holiday versus camping with people you don't know that well.

Original poster
supersop60 · 10/08/2024 16:38

I can see it now "let's go down to the beach together. Super, you can watch the twins while Sally has a swim, Bob and I are going for a beer"

Tbf, I don't know if Bob would be on board with that, I don't know them well enough.

OP posts:
Justrolledmyeyesoutloud · 10/08/2024 16:32

Whu is always men thay do this??
My dh invited his best mate and wife on my dream holiday years ago and they came..it was fine but l was absolutely livid with him.

PensionMention · 10/08/2024 16:32

I would be telling my husband to do one quite frankly if he had not consulted me. I would then be booking something else for myself and adult children using his credit card. Plus are their children still actual children because that changes the dynamic completely.

Stichintime · 10/08/2024 16:31

Tell him to offer up your sleeping bag and tent as well, because you're not going.

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