to report this to the police, even though I am technically implicating myself?

Has the op been
a - abducted?
b - arrested?
or
c - became the menu special?

I really want an update, I'm thinking they've all been arrested for breaking into the park to stalk in bushes/steal ducks jokes obviously

My guess is, the 2 men were actually 2 columns of ducks in raincoats and they have captured OP to prevent her from talking about their duck business.

🦆

Either, absolutely nothing, or absolutely nothing 🤣

Oh my god OP, you can’t just leave us hanging like this! What happened on your surveillance operation?

Ah yes, you are right about that. So not necessarily pie 'n' mash or fish & chips then. I still maintain however that you can't be sure about the ethnicity of the guys in the park just because they work somewhere that serves duck. A quick look on Just Eat reveals that duck is a feature on many different takeaway menus where I am, including a burger bar that offers the Duck Special of "bbq base with mushroom, spring onions and duck", a pizza place advertising the Duck Special Pizza with "BBQ sauce, roast duck, spring onions and mushrooms", and a salad bar with salads from around the world including a Crispy Duck and Noodle Salad. These are in addition to various Indian and Chinese takeaways which seem to be what some posters have concluded that the OP must be talking about.

Exactly

@ToplessWordle The OP says they serve duck though, so Mystery Meat Pie & Mash isn't relevant, nor is a fish n chip shop without any duck on the menu.

Fish and chip shop menu below:

We obviously live in very different parts of the country! East London has a pie and mash shop on virtually every street corner and they don't always specify the contents of their pies. I've added a screenshot of a typical menu below.

You may remember the horse meat in ready meals scandal of 2013, when horse meat (sometimes 100%) was discovered in "beef" burgers and ready meals such as lasagnes. When meat is obtained from illicit sources, the seller obviously does not advertise this! But how confident are you in the provenance of the meat in the saveloy or steak and kidney pie offered up on a typical fish and chip shop menu such as the one I've linked to below?

Genuinely not remotely embarrassed in the slightest 😂

Think you got your double entendres mixed up. How embarassing for you.

Dunno what fish and chip shops you frequent but we don't get battered duck in ours 😕
Duck pie and mash is a new one on me too (plus pie and mash takeaway needs to be a thing, didn't know it was - if it is it needs to make its way here lol

I think those shouting about racism say more about their own prejudices than those of the OP! She hasn't mentioned the race of these guys, or the type of cuisine offered by the takeaway...it could be a pies and mash kind of takeaway, fish and chips (other dishes, including ones potentially containing duck, are available at these establishments), burger bar...

I think feeding the pony means something gay.

Or shredded in a spring roll.

Anyone else think ‘feeding the ducks’ was some sort of double entendre for gay sex? I was most astonished to read on they were literally feeding ducks.

OP is now in bits in a bin bag.

A public park being closed does not make it private property, and does not make you a responsible dog owners.

Responsible dog owners don't own XL Bullies.

You are trespassing by doing that.
For the love of God tell me you don't let your dog off the lead.

Is it even legal to own an XL Bully? Is it muzzled? Is it registered?

Actually @FinalInstructionstotheAudience it really did happen where I used to live, but you are free to believe what you like.

Also I would like to point out that I didn’t mention what kind of takeaway it was so how the hell could I be being racist? If a certain stereotype came to your mind or anyone else’s maybe you should all take a look at yourself. More than one country/culture eats duck you know!

Worth a bit of surveillance as having black bags does sound dodgy. X

I love how the OP completely missed your pun and responded like it was a serious comment. I’m still not entirely convinced this post is real but I want it to be so I’m getting the popcorn in now and waiting for updates on her stakeout!

It rather depends on whether she is walking the dog in the early hours so that she can take his muzzle off, or if she thinks her dog is not quite the same a you describe here.

The dog which attacked me when I was 12 was known to be friendly, and was on a lead. It grabbed the collar of my thick coat and shedded it to ribbons and was just about to go for my then unprotected throat when someone pulled it off. Had I not been wearing that thick coat, I would not be here.

Police. Prob won’t give a duck😂

Is this post for real? Why mention the breed of your dog unless it’s to provoke people? The sentence “As i’m walking him at 4am when the park is closed, therefore it’s on private property?” apart from being badly written, makes me wonder what alternative reality the OP is living in. Unless I’ve misunderstood that, she’s saying that if you break into a public space outside opening hours, it becomes “private property”? And that’s before we even get to the ducks. For our entertainment, I would highly recommend a stakeout and regular updates.