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AIBU?

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Original poster

Quiet neighbours now making noise.

589 replies

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 07:48

My neighbours talked to us about the noise coming from our property. OK, my son has a hobby that does make an annoying noise. Since then we have made sure he's doing it less but we obviously aren't going to stop him completely. They haven't said anything since and I think we've been considerate in reducing the number of hours our son does his thing.

It seems like they've now decided that they are allowed to make more noise. We've been neighbours for years and they've always been quiet. Now we get occasional music or radio in their backyard. When I asked them about it they said they have always worn headphones to be considerate but they don't really like listening that way, so they thought it was fair they got to have their hobbies the way they enjoy them best as well.

Would I be unreasonable to complain to them again? There is a difference between children playing and music when they have the option of headphones.

OP posts:
Hazelville · 10/08/2024 14:16

RightOnTheEdge · 10/08/2024 11:36

The OP has admitted that they were BU, is going to talk to the neighbours and reach a compromise and posters are still piling on and falling over themselves to stick the boot in and accusing her of being a troll for saying people go about their lives before 10.20am Hmm

It's a shame that you don't live near a park with a hoop OP.
I think that silent basket ball looks like a great idea.

Good for you taking the criticism on board. It’s not an easy thing to do.

Raree · 10/08/2024 14:05

Basketball noise is fucking annoying, and for someone who has misophonia like me is actually really distressing, I can't stop my twat neighbours bouncing their ball but boy would I like to. I can't actually believe this is real YOU are definitely the annoying neighbours and I would be having my music on from morning til reasonable evening hours, YOU wear the headphones for a change.

Hazelville · 10/08/2024 14:02

Otherstories2002 · 10/08/2024 10:03

Do you not understand that you cannot expect silence from them because you’ve set the precedent? They tried to be considerate by going to the extreme end of noise minimising (headphones for music is unbelievably considerate) whilst you’ve gone the extreme opposite end and only now want to meet in the middle because they’re acting like normal neighbours and it’s bothering you.

Do not go round there with any expectation of them not listening to their radio. Go round and apologise for being utterly selfish and inconsiderate and assure them that the basketball noise will stop. Don’t even attempt to broach the music situation.

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This.

andthat · 10/08/2024 13:56

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 08:59

He plays on and off through the day. Yesterday it was three times. When he's at school often once before school and up to three times after. Times are random. I obviously need to think about this some more.

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Once before school? That’s totally out of order to be creating that sort of noise at that time of day.

KerChingo · 10/08/2024 13:51

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 07:50

Basketball.

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Sorry but you cant complain. The noise of a ball thumping every minute or so is incredibly intrusive. Like water torture...even the human rights act covers the right not to be tortured.

YABVU

Tablematremote · 10/08/2024 13:48

Our ndn have a basketball hoop on their garage, it’s just outside our lounge window on the other side of a fence, it’s a constant bumpf bumpf, I am wondering if their mum has limited the time they are out there as it’s short burst of about 15 mins which I know will stop but having said that it’s really loud it our lounge and makes watching the tv difficult so we end up going to our conservatory.

Ivesaidenough · 10/08/2024 13:45

I'm clearly the odd one out here, but I'd MUCH prefer to hear a kid practising basketball than someone playing music out loud. Move next to me OP !
😆

Girliefriendlikespuppies · 10/08/2024 13:43

It all sounds like normal household noise though 🤷‍♀️ on both sides.

Just ignore it and get on with your lives unless you want to live in a house with no neighbours.

pinacollateral · 10/08/2024 13:43

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 09:33

In fairness, they are awake at 6.30. That's when their lights are on.

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Just because your neighbour's lights are on at 6:30 doesn't mean it's OK to be out playing basketball pre-9am. People making unnecessary noise at that time of the morning is very annoying.

MyPeppyTaupeFox · 10/08/2024 13:40

I had to do similar with a neighbour who parked really selfishly opposite our driveway which made reversing off it reallllllly difficult due to the shape of the cul de sac. We'd asked and asked very politely over the years but they refused to stop. I parked awkwardly for them maybe 3 times before they complained. I replied saying "given you have been parking awkwardly for us for years, I didn't think you'd mind where I've parked, but now you've asked of course I'll stop doing it." After that, they suddenly realised how difficult it had been and rarely parked that way from then on. Sometimes you've just got to be petty because some people (ie you OP) just don't get it otherwise.

Otherstories2002 · 10/08/2024 13:22

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 12:05

I feel like he should be able to have some agreed time where it's accepted that the kid next door likes this activity, even if half an hour a day. I do take on board that it's generally annoying and not currently limited enough. So I need to work out what the neighbours can tolerate without stress.

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But not ok for the neighbours to listen to music 🤦🏼‍♀️

Charlottescobweb · 10/08/2024 13:16

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 12:05

I feel like he should be able to have some agreed time where it's accepted that the kid next door likes this activity, even if half an hour a day. I do take on board that it's generally annoying and not currently limited enough. So I need to work out what the neighbours can tolerate without stress.

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Why can't he play 1 to 2 hours at once. Why does it need to be split that would drive me mad. At least with music there is an end to it.

Snazzysausage · 10/08/2024 13:15

Be grateful next door haven't downloaded basketball noise and played it loudly and randomly through a speaker near your house for a couple of hours at a time so your family can enjoy the undiluted pleasure of what they have had to endure for some considerable time by the sounds of it. You've already lost the goodwill of your neighbours imo.

Charlottescobweb · 10/08/2024 13:11

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 09:57

If they're just doing it to make a point, it would be nice. It served them well for over a decade.

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You are entitled. You're having me on this can't be real.

Charlottescobweb · 10/08/2024 13:07

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 08:37

Given how seriously outvoted I am on this, obviously I'm unreasonable. I thought maybe the neighbours were being unfair as what they were doing obviously worked for them before, so changing it seems directed at us.

I will apologise and talk to them about how to meet both our needs.

You're going to tell them to stop playing music. You sound odd leave them alone.

CallingMeALamppost · 10/08/2024 13:07

Apologies if it's already been suggested but is there any sort of indoor area where he could go some of the time to practice? And during school time, maybe a school gym or one to use after school? I appreciate it isn't the same as being outdoors but it does sound excessive, particularly the before school playing.

Grmumpy · 10/08/2024 13:05

Two hours a day of an annoying thumping noise…you are minimising that yet not their noise.

Charlottescobweb · 10/08/2024 13:04

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 08:06

Maybe I need to talk to them and ask what they think they can tolerate.

You are harassing your neighbours. Leave them alone it's only 2 hours of music you sound awful and entitled.

ListentotheButterflies · 10/08/2024 13:03

The basketball is only about half an hour at a time, a few times a day.

Nightmare.

Ball games where you can hear the 'thump' of a ball are a kind of torture.

Charlottescobweb · 10/08/2024 13:00

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 07:55

The basketball is only about half an hour at a time, a few times a day. Their music yesterday was for two hours. We've got our son down to no more than three or four times a day now, so it's not excessive. It used to be twice that. So we've done something about it.

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So let them enjoy their garden with music. You sound entitled and selfish.

anothernewstart9 · 10/08/2024 13:00

shuffleofftobuffalo · 10/08/2024 12:06

The very idea of you being allowed to make noise and they're not is hilariously entitled.

This!

ListentotheButterflies · 10/08/2024 12:57

Not read every single post but if a basketball was banging against an adjoining wall or fence or even in a driveway, several times a day, it would drive me mental. That's a horrible thing to put up with - any bang, bang, bang, sound.

SweetBirdsong · 10/08/2024 12:51

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 10:45

Plan: Apologise to neighbours for noise over a long time. Apologise for complaining about their music at all. Tell them I didn't realise just how grating it can be. See if we can work out times it would work for everyone. I am going to ask not tell, whether half an hour a day would be within what they can accept. If not, I will look into a rubber lawn area, as suggested.

As I and many others have said, why is your son doing this AT HOME, in the GARDEN? Why does he not go and practice on a basketball court/in the park etc? As a number of posters have said, you sound utterly self-aware and clueless. Thank God you're not my neighbour!

brunettemic · 10/08/2024 12:49

Occasional music or radio? You’ve got to be kidding me that you’re thinking about complaining. What if they sneeze, do they need to come round to apologise? Presumably you’ve also asked them to quietly push their car down the road before starting the engine?
Honestly, this place just gets more and more batshit by the day.

shuffleofftobuffalo · 10/08/2024 12:48

The very idea of you being allowed to make noise and they're not is hilariously entitled.

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