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Quiet neighbours now making noise.

589 replies

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 07:48

My neighbours talked to us about the noise coming from our property. OK, my son has a hobby that does make an annoying noise. Since then we have made sure he's doing it less but we obviously aren't going to stop him completely. They haven't said anything since and I think we've been considerate in reducing the number of hours our son does his thing.

It seems like they've now decided that they are allowed to make more noise. We've been neighbours for years and they've always been quiet. Now we get occasional music or radio in their backyard. When I asked them about it they said they have always worn headphones to be considerate but they don't really like listening that way, so they thought it was fair they got to have their hobbies the way they enjoy them best as well.

Would I be unreasonable to complain to them again? There is a difference between children playing and music when they have the option of headphones.

OP posts:
AssassinsEyebrow · 10/08/2024 08:43

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 07:55

The basketball is only about half an hour at a time, a few times a day. Their music yesterday was for two hours. We've got our son down to no more than three or four times a day now, so it's not excessive. It used to be twice that. So we've done something about it.

You're complaining you hear their music for 2 hours a day...
But that's what you've reduced your sons basketball playing to

Dygger · 10/08/2024 08:42

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 07:55

The basketball is only about half an hour at a time, a few times a day. Their music yesterday was for two hours. We've got our son down to no more than three or four times a day now, so it's not excessive. It used to be twice that. So we've done something about it.

You're just like a vile ex-neighbour of mine who agreed that his son would cut down from two hours of random drum practice a day (sometimes from 7am, sometimes in the evenings, sometimes in the afternoons after school) to 'just' an hour a day and a couple of hours a day each day at the weekend. When I put the house up for sale years later (when the son had gone off to university) the neighbour stuck his head over the garden wall and said very aggressively that I'd better not sell to a large noisy family because he and his wife liked the peace.

If your son was playing basketball for two hours a day and ruining my peaceful enjoyment of my garden all summer, I'd be playing music loudly all day and doing a lot of noisy DIY. Teach your son to be a good neighbour by limiting him to an hour at time that works for your neighbours, a couple of times a week. The worst thing about random noise is that you're waiting for it to start and then when it does start you don't know when or if it will stop. The rest of the time he goes to the nearest park and shoots hoops there.

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 08:42

ThisHangryPinkBalonz · 10/08/2024 08:42

Isn't there a park nearby? The ball bouncing and slamming for 30 minutes four times a day would kill me. A radio isn't comparable.

No park with a hoop.

OP posts:
ThisHangryPinkBalonz · 10/08/2024 08:42

Isn't there a park nearby? The ball bouncing and slamming for 30 minutes four times a day would kill me. A radio isn't comparable.

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 08:42

99% of more than 500 posts say I'm unreasonable. Can't really argue with that.

OP posts:
ElaineMBenes · 10/08/2024 08:42

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 08:37

Given how seriously outvoted I am on this, obviously I'm unreasonable. I thought maybe the neighbours were being unfair as what they were doing obviously worked for them before, so changing it seems directed at us.

I will apologise and talk to them about how to meet both our needs.

It probably is directed at you.
They were being considerate neighbours but you weren't repaying that favour, so they've decided to no longer be considerate.
Don't blame them.

ooooohnoooooo · 10/08/2024 08:42

At 13 your son should be out roaming and doing his basketball in the local park /court.

No reason for him to be doing at home.

Likewhatever · 10/08/2024 08:41

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 08:01

He's 13 and we think it's better than screen time. I didn't think normal kid playing noise was wrong.

I had an hour of radio during the week when I was trying to work from home last week.

THUD THUD THUDTHUD….THUD..THUD THUD …….THUD THUD THUD THUDTHUD …..THUD THUD THUD THUD….THUDTHUDTHUD…

That’s about five seconds worth and I bet it was annoying to read.

Hello87abc · 10/08/2024 08:41

It obviously didn’t work for them before….it worked for you. But they’ve just thought stuff it, we are going to enjoy our space as we like too

Fluufer · 10/08/2024 08:41

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 08:37

Given how seriously outvoted I am on this, obviously I'm unreasonable. I thought maybe the neighbours were being unfair as what they were doing obviously worked for them before, so changing it seems directed at us.

I will apologise and talk to them about how to meet both our needs.

Send your kid to the park where he can play as much basketball as he likes.

Doingmybest12 · 10/08/2024 08:41

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 08:37

Given how seriously outvoted I am on this, obviously I'm unreasonable. I thought maybe the neighbours were being unfair as what they were doing obviously worked for them before, so changing it seems directed at us.

I will apologise and talk to them about how to meet both our needs.

It's not directed at you, they've just realised they were going to too much effort to stop you hearing them, when clearly noise isn't a problem for you and they have changed their habits and enjoying their home more freely.

TemuSpecialBuy · 10/08/2024 08:40

Its not clear why can't your 13 year old go to a park?

Even if the park is driving distance it cant be more than 10-15 mins... you could drop him before work and you could make his own way back or you could collect him at lunch.

He clearly LOVES basketball so presumably can fill 3 hours of time?

DreamW3aver · 10/08/2024 08:39

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 08:29

It's actually right next to it but I work during school hours anyway. During holidays I just deal with it.

You are lucky that you can ignore intermittent unpredictable bouncing ball noise. For most people that element of Chinese torture is way way worse than music or a continuous noise at a slightly higher volume.

Pretty much everyone is telling you the same thing, the answer isn't less basketball it's further away basketball

DoIWantTo · 10/08/2024 08:39

So would that be 3-4 times a day at half an hour each? So 2hrs a day? You’re not the sharpest tool in the shed OP, they should be cranking their music up every time he’s out there.

Twistybranch · 10/08/2024 08:38

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 07:55

The basketball is only about half an hour at a time, a few times a day. Their music yesterday was for two hours. We've got our son down to no more than three or four times a day now, so it's not excessive. It used to be twice that. So we've done something about it.

So half an hour, 4 times a day. Is two hours.

Why you complaining that they are playing music for two hours.

lacefan · 10/08/2024 08:38

Oldfatandfrumpy · 10/08/2024 08:37

I'm with your neighbours here I'm afraid. Why on earth should they put themselves out being considerate to you when you don't do the same.

You say you've 'got it down' to a couple of hours a day, which means that it had been more - how long for? You seem fine with your son disturbing the neighbours for a couple of hours every day but then say their music was for two hours

And of course you can put the basketball hoop somewhere less disruptive for them, you've just chosen not to because it would involve work and cost to put a concreted area elsewhere in your garden

I agree. Your neighbours are not the unreasonable ones here.

Get off your arse and take him to the fcking park. Good grief, the entitlement is astounding.

nietzscheanvibe · 10/08/2024 08:38

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 07:55

The basketball is only about half an hour at a time, a few times a day. Their music yesterday was for two hours. We've got our son down to no more than three or four times a day now, so it's not excessive. It used to be twice that. So we've done something about it.

We've got our son down to no more than three or four times a day now, so it's not excessive.

🤣🤣🤣

ComeOnThenFanny · 10/08/2024 08:38

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 08:04

It could be argued it's inconsiderate and selfish to not allow a child their hobby. Maybe I'll limit it to three sessions a day but I think any less is not fair to my son.

I'm starting to think this isn't real.

You're being very entitled, OP.

Worriedatwork1 · 10/08/2024 08:38

As a basketball mum I get both sides, the noise is loud and annoying but you also want your son to train. That said I can’t see why he needs to be playing so many times a day, it does seem excessive when he’s presumably just shooting/dribbling alone, are there any camps you can send him on during holidays? My son normally does a fair few full day camps most holidays so he is then more worn out for a couple of days.

Also maybe get him to focus more on strength and conditioning or fitness etc by going to the gym or running.

I’ve also looked at rubber matting for under our hoop to reduce the noise…

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 08:37

Given how seriously outvoted I am on this, obviously I'm unreasonable. I thought maybe the neighbours were being unfair as what they were doing obviously worked for them before, so changing it seems directed at us.

I will apologise and talk to them about how to meet both our needs.

OP posts:
Ophy83 · 10/08/2024 08:37

OpalBird · 10/08/2024 08:04

It could be argued it's inconsiderate and selfish to not allow a child their hobby. Maybe I'll limit it to three sessions a day but I think any less is not fair to my son.

You said earlier you'd already limited it to 3x/day! They probably need to play the music to cover up the basketball sound.

Oldfatandfrumpy · 10/08/2024 08:37

I'm with your neighbours here I'm afraid. Why on earth should they put themselves out being considerate to you when you don't do the same.

You say you've 'got it down' to a couple of hours a day, which means that it had been more - how long for? You seem fine with your son disturbing the neighbours for a couple of hours every day but then say their music was for two hours

And of course you can put the basketball hoop somewhere less disruptive for them, you've just chosen not to because it would involve work and cost to put a concreted area elsewhere in your garden

DarkForces · 10/08/2024 08:37

NinaPersson · 10/08/2024 08:29

wtf with the siblings sitting in silence remark?! I don’t t get what you’re getting at there.

how is asking if he has siblings a nasty thought? Please write down whatever your projections are

Why the hell would asking if he has siblings be relevant?

Maray1967 · 10/08/2024 08:37

Yes, to reiterate - I have DSs and no way would I allow them to do basketball next to the neighbour’s house. It’s completely antisocial.

He’s a teenager - if this is his regular hobby you need to find a basketball court and register him to use that.

Trampolining is bad enough - I limited our kids’ use of ours because of the squeaking. And any shouting meant they came in.

Royalshyness · 10/08/2024 08:37

A few times a day is a lot .. what was he doing before you cut it down?

they are entitled to listen to music if your family are noisy

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