Abroad....Should have stayed at home

I'd hate to dress up and go out to spend time with strangers. It sounds like your holiday expectations are mis-matched but one shouldn't trump another. You need to compromise.

Agh annoying. Just did an activity holiday with my teen and was much better as they had other teens as part of a group. We also got some beach. If you want different holidays I would be tempted to go with a friend or on your own.

Come to a compromise. Talk! Some folk like to chill and relax on hol, particularly if they have stressful jobs. If you like painting the town red try to go on holiday with a pal who has a similar view.

You clearly have different ideas about how to spend holidays.
I wouldnt want to sit on the phone in a hotel room but I wouldnt want to dress up to go out in the evening (presumably to eat/drink) either.

We just came home from a vacation all inclusive and dinner started at 19. And the kids club closed at 22 so impossible to get DS home before that. My DH is like you, he needs people, love to dress up etc. I force myself but I would rather read a book like your hubby 😄. Anyway, he always goes out on his own on holidays and with friends at home. He's happy and Im happy, to each their own.

Oh dear that's abit shit. What a waste of money.
You need to ditch them and go on girls hol or solo. Do not let them dictate.

God middle aged men are dull
What kind of role model is he for your son!!

Thank christ I ditched my ex
Hols witn my teens now are amazingly fun.
We leave our phones inside and go out without

Hi Op
that doesn’t sound great, though I do like some chilled nights on the balcony with some nice wine and nibbles. I am a regular visitor to GC, if you want to say roughly what area you are in I can recommend some lovely restaurants and some nice chilled bars. Try and make the most of your holiday- at least you have the weather!

What first poster said

I'd fuck off out alone

Life is short

Go down and watch the entertainment on your own. No one will care that you are sitting at a table for one.

I'd be pissed off with DH, that's really not ok.

DS not so much, that's just typical teen behaviour. I definitely needed my parents to drag me out for dinners on holidays etc. Always had a nice time eventually but you need both parents on board.

When you go for your next evening walk tell them you’ve met some fun people and stay out and enjoy yourself. Teenagers well, they’re peak teenager on holiday sometimes but your husband sounds like a fun sponge.

Eating at 6pm is for toddlers. Seriously that is ridiculous.

Tomorrow, don't eat before 7:30 and then tell DH you are not ready to go to sit in a room for the rest of the evening. If he won't make the effort - just go out on your own. My suggestion would be to always have a book in your bag (or a Kindle). That way you won't get the awkward feeling of just 'being' somewhere. You can go to restaurants, cafes, sit by the pool, on the beach, on a wall, in a bar - anywhere and you have something to 'do' and not feel self conscious.

DS is just being a teen but DH is being selfish.

Surely a 16 year old boy would want to be hanging out with the other teens on holidays having fun and chatting up girls. Would you consider talking to your husband about going out somewhere nice for dinner at a later time tomorrow?

I’m a single mum and go away with my daughter, as soon as we get to the entertainment in the evening she’s gone and left me by myself! I embrace it and enjoy it, I’m not sitting in the room when I’m away and I urge you not to either. Think of Shirley Valentine! There’s always someone to speak to, or sit by yourself if you’re unsure

Leave the teen.

Ask your husband if he wants to head out for dinner at 8p.m. Just the two of you.

If he says no, go on your own. Take a book and order a large vino. Enjoy the location as much as possible.

The problems can wait for when you’re home. For now try and get as much enjoyment as possible for YOU.

Your DH and DS are making me feel less guilty!

We are just back from holiday and I'm not a great drinker especially after a meal as I just want to chill, but we have dinner a bit later 7.30-8 and I at least go for a walk after dinner as much as I would like to chill in the room, I appreciate it's a bit boring going back to the room before 9.30-10. I also deliberately booked us into a ( lovely and had our own room ) hostel one night and shooed DH up onto the roof terrace with his bottle of port to make friends.

I would suggest to your DH that you need to compromise- this was suggested to me when I complained on here about DH and his need to drink both before and after dinner- so one night back to the bedroom by 8, next one dinner later and out until at least 9.30pm. Or book something like a cruise where there is loads of entertainment if you're prepared to watch it solo.

That would drive me mad. I love holiday evenings, getting dressed up and having dinner and a few cocktails under the stars.

Many people are still round the pool/on the beach at 6 not eating dinner.

Id give them an ultimatum that it’s your turn to have a say in what you do otherwise go down to the bar on your own and have a couple of drinks and stay out late!

They are very selfish. Teen, to be expected but he should still understand give and take. Husband, well he’s out of order. Book some more trips for yourself if they don’t want to participate and take yourself down to the entertainment or to a nearby bar for a drink, or maybe some wine and a kindle on your balcony. I’d be crying into my wine how much money was being wasted being more fed up than at home, and it would be the last holiday for some time

Leave your teen where he is- he is old enough not to be forced to go out. But your DH needs to be compromising a bit so you can get out and about!

Can you take a pack of cards down to dinner and suggest a drink and a game after?

Sounds really tough OP and I can absolutely understand why you are upset.

You've already had some great advice on this thread. I wanted to add something that goes against the grain WRT your DS. I have teenagers and I do think it is entirely normal for them to go through this phase, and that leaving them to it may well be the best approach. However, I wanted to suggest that you consider talking to DS and offering to do something together of his choice, no pressure. Throw the net wide! He may well knock you back and I don't think pushing it will achieve anything but I do think it is worth asking. He may be finding the dynamic between you and DH tricky. I think that even if he declines the offer he will (somewhere deep down) appreciate you asking.

If it is any consolation I think most of them come out the other end being lovely. I know that doesn't help the situation wrt DH but personally I found a smiling, kind late teen son was a real tonic when my marriage imploded. I haven't leaned on him, or over shared but he has been a ray of sunshine (mostly) fusing a really difficult time.

If you do manage to drag them out, take a pack of cards or uno and have a game over drinks. Takes the pressure off conversation.
But I wiuld be beside myself if I was you.

You've kind of set them up for failure as you knew what they are like in general and even had a trip where they behaved like this. Why did you think this time was going to be suddenly different? I would have saved up the money or gone on a holiday that pleases everyone with a view on compromise ie one night of entertainment, one night of chilling out. It's their holiday, too and if all they want is to sit in the shade or enjoy being indoors in a different setting then so be it.

@Waterdrophead Don't allow these bores to put a dampener on your holiday.

Go to dinner and chat with the lovely people there or enjoy by yourself, then stop at the bar on the way back.

People are always eager to meet and chat with others, so you'll be fine.

No advice doe what you do with the husband and som though 🍸