To think life with one child looks soooo easy

And it rattles when people say "Have 2 so they play together".
Playing was never the issue! Playing can be fun.
What about severe post natal mental health issues? Unhelpful partners and grandparents? Having enough money?

I think I would have thrown myself off a bridge if I'd had another baby- I nearly did with the first!

You have to do what is best for you x

Well, yes! I have one and it's great!
She's sociable, confident, enjoys school and we can afford to pay for her hobbies and we do have nice holidays.
People go on another onlies being lonely, well I live on an estate and other kids are always in my house playing with my daughter. I enjoy talking to the other kids too. They say their parents are busy with younger siblings, so it works out well for us all.

There's several only kids in DDs class. Lovely kids.

I don't mean to offend but I do think people should think more about the number of kids they have if they find it hard. I found it really hard which is why I stuck at 1.
I know society says 2 is the norm and I see lots of people say they had a second child to give the first a sibling.
Why? It really isn't necessary. Of course have another child if you really want one. But you don't have to do it! And I'll tell that to anyone.

They depends on the kid I think, my dd loved playing by herself and would spend hours playing. If I tried to get involved she got very annoyed.

On holidays she always would find a friend to play with. Ime siblings tend to stick together whereas my dd was able to find friends anywhere!

One way doesn't have to be better than the other, big families and small families all have their pros and cons 🤷‍♀️

Its an opinion forum. People are allowed opinions. World would be boring if we were all the same. And yes, I've seen some posts I don't like and disagree with but I'd rather hear them than live in an echo chamber

There’s always at least one poster on every thread who lacks critical thinking skills.

Ignore this type of comment. I can't undersrand why it's considered OK to say such hurtful things about 1 child familiies.

Please don’t let it. Every MN thread even tangentially related to one-child families seems to attract unpleasant comments. It used to upset me but I don’t let it get to me now, as I know their ludicrous stereotyping bears no relation to reality. Your family is fine as it is.

Please don’t. While we are very lucky to have the second child we wanted after years of struggle, I do miss the quality of relationship I was able to have with my eldest before his brother came along. I wouldn’t change where we are now and appreciate how lucky I am to have the family size I wanted, but it’s not been unequivocally better for my eldest, who really struggled with the change to begin with (even though he loves the little guy)

Oh I am sure that they do, but there was definitely a vibe of "its your turn" like for the night feeds! You know that feeling of loving your child and being willing to die for them, but wanting just half an hour to yourself? it was like that.

My mum who had 5 of us told me it looks harder for me (I have the one). She said as kids, we all kept each other entertained and played with each other. Parents of one have to play with your kid and occupy them yourself🤷🏻‍♀️

It's funny in that I have the opposite. I've got just the one and when we go away with friends with multiples it looks much less relaxing as they seem to spend most the time stopping their kids from injuring each other.

What a horrible thread this is, full of smug people trying to out do each other with how perfect, easygoing, chilled and simple their life is with their 1/2/3/4/5 child/ren.
Glad you all have life so sussed out!!! Did you ever stop to think that maybe it's the actual children, their individual personalities, needs, challenges and abilities/disabilities that make life chilled, simple and easy, not how many you have?

It is, I come away from my brother and sil house (they have 4 kids) and think thank fuck I only had one 😂

Listen I'm Irish so I grew up with loads of cousins of varying ages, I know this isn't the case nowadays, in my friendship group pretty much no one has cousins children, so that's why school & play groups fill the gap, my own cousins children are all in their 20's so no room for Tadhg

I'm sorry for making you feel like shit, this thread shows how guilty we all feel for things that out of our control

No idea but my child is being raised by a single parent and is likely to be an under average height man so the worse of the worse according to mumsnet!😂

As a lone parent to an only child, we are much closer than many families with more than one child. More like friends! And the stress never stops!!

Each family is different. Get over the judgement.

thanks that's so nice of you to say, it's my issue not yours, the joys of a public forum where people have different lives 😊

The funny thing is that one-child families are the largest group amongst those with children. Not "outliers" at all, but that never really comes across in these threads. It's not an unusual family structure in the least, it's the most common.

I think that you have to do what is right for you. I have 4 and I am also a lone parent, some of mine have SEN, it’s not been easy. It’s always been a busy house with kids playing/arguing/fighting 😁. I don’t envy parents of only children because it’s not what I chose. Parents of only’s do need to arrange a lot more and spend time making sure their child is entertained. They do have more time and the child gets their full attention. Mine are teens now and have a lovely relationship with each other, the house is still full of laughter and fun. They quite often go out together, it’s lovely to see and I definitely wouldn’t want to change it.

It is easier imo having one, I would love a second but dh changed his mind and wanted to stick at 1 - and ds says he wouldn't like a sibling- so there is no chance I will get my second (plus am now 46) - but on the plus side it is much easier with 1 dc both to manage, it is more relaxed and financially also

I had 5 so yes, 1 child is easy! Having a large family involves a lot of juggling and sometimes feeling a bit overwhelmed trying to meet everyone's needs. On the plus side, they were all company for each other, played together and life was never boring! I love seeing them together now as adults ❤️

@Thunderandlightningisfrightening I never realised it was a thing people bashed! Just why? If you’re happy with your own choices/decisions…just why

It shouldn't, the reality is that all family structures have their issues and benefits. For every great big happy family, there are families where children don't get enough attention and enough resources and grow up resenting their siblings. And a sibling is no guarantee against loneliness, either as a child or an adult.

The statistics are on your side as well - only children are statistically more confident and have better educational outcomes.

I had a second child because I wanted one, not to benefit my existing DC. And that's a good thing because my DC2 was a high needs baby and DC1 had a shit time of it during the first year (my husband was working away a lot and we have no family support so quite frankly DC1 was somewhat neglected and often only had his basic needs met). I felt and still feel shit about that. I think there's always something to feel shit about as a parent.

Please don't, it's a thread full of people with opinions based on anecdote and stereotype. All families are different and all are equally valid. Your only will be totally fine :)

https://www.newscientist.com/article/mg26335032-100-spoilt-self-centered-and-lonely-examining-the-only-child-stereotype/ (you can archive.today to get the full version)

There is a spate of only child bashing threads atmA