To think is over generous gift of money for a wedding present?

Me too!
10 years ago we got a range of £30-£200 and I was shocked at the generosity of the £200. One friend gave us some locally made fudge as they didn't have much money and they made a real effort to be there, I was so delighted they came, and I've never forgotten how tasty and nicely gift wrapped that fudge was!
The differences in incomes, cash flow, expectations and savings on Mumsnet always blows my mind!

Looks like the guests are expected to pay for the whole wedding these days!

More than generous!

For a hundred guests, £100 each is £10,000! Would you expect actual gifts to come anywhere near that? To expect more is very greedy! £50 is enough if you’re not related.£100 from relations is fine. The idea is not for guests to pay for the wedding!

Sorry op but its up to him what he does.He sounds like a lovely,caring man...leave him be!

No that's madness. As some PP have said, pretty much every wedding I've been to has cost me hundreds of pounds to attend. More if I've been on the hen do. So I've already spent considerably more on the bride and groom than whatever usually very average meal I'm served, and then someone's suggesting I have to give further hundreds of pounds as a gift? Er, no.

And £1000 is way too much unless a millionaire lol

@Justtryingtofitin You think £100 cash is a cheap wedding present

I have never spent £250/500 on wedding presents even for family or really close friends

Wow, this thread is an eye opener! Surely what you give should be proportionate to what you can afford? For example, after bills and essentials, we only have a few hundred quid per month leftover. There's no way we could give £200 or £300 as a wedding gift - certainly not after forking out for clothes, travel, possibly a hotel etc - and I'd hate to think we were being judged as cheap for not being able to!! I haven't been to a wedding in a few years but going back about 10 years ago, we used to give £30 if it was friends and £50 to family.
We're invited to my cousin's wedding later this year and I was thinking of giving £100 and thinking that was really generous!!
Oh and I hate this nasty idea of "covering your meal" as well. It makes it so transactional - surely bride and groom invite their guests because they want them there, regardless of gifts, not to recoup the cost of the wedding!!

But you don’t invite family and friends to a wedding expecting a financial gift from them to cover the cost of a meal and wedding you have chosen to invite them to. You invite them because you want them to share your special day with you

Me too! £50 is enough surely.

Yeah, I've never heard of that either. Giving the bride and groom (as a cash gift) what your wedding food cost. How strange! Should 'guests' give them a contribution towards the venue, and the flowers, and the cake, and the photographer, and the bride's dress too?!

What $ is that? Is that Euros?

Or perhaps he's comfortable financially, has a great relationship with his family and is generous. It's a bit of a leap to suggest huge issues and a lack of self esteem.

Far too much. People having a wedding invite guests to be part of their day, not so the guests can return what they have cost ‘per head’ to the bride and groom.

If you don't mind me asking, why did you give so much @Solocup?
Was it the norm in your circles?
Were you really close to them or very wealthy or both?
Sorry, I'm just being nosy and feel free to ignore! To me it seems an unusually generous gift for a cousin.

Too much. If I was the bride, I would return £900-£920 of it.

It was 13 years ago. My wedding was only the 4th wedding I'd ever been to and I was too young to buy a gift for the first 3 as I was a child. I didn't know wedding gifts were a thing? Cards yes but anything else just seemed like a nice bonus. My uncle has had a well paid job in the same place for my whole life and he lives in a gorgeous home, has lovely cars so money isn't an issue. He was at my wedding and was genuinely happy for us so it's fine 😊

I gave a cousin a grand for their wedding, I think it was actually £2000. I didn’t even get a thank you. Yeah, it’s unnecessarily generous.

That's good news OP.
It's a very generous gift still.

Just tell him that he can take advantage of the conversion rate 🤣

If he wants to give them $500 then he only needs to spend £392… or $1000 is only £794

But in Ireland certainly, no matter how simple you try to keep it and focused on the guests needs - with no flim flam other than a decent meal, drinks and music, it's going to cost rather a lot. Even the most un lavish, under the top wedding will probably run to 80-100 euro per guest at least. And if people are really so contemptuous of people who hold just normal weddings, and so unwilling to pay for anything to do with it, then they could always stay home! It's an invitation not a summons. I have certainly done so and would do so again if I couldn't afford it, which to me includes giving a decent gift. As it happens, I think the whole wedding industrial complex is a bit of a racket but the high costs of weddings is not because vast swathes of people are materialist full of shit assholes but because it is a ridiculous industry which charges what it can because people will pay it. Having said all that, it is an industry which supports huge numbers of jobs and hospitality outlets. I reckon half the hotels in Ireland would close if it weren't for them.

"cheap" ... ?! JFC!

I'm a single parent on benefits, people should be lucky I stick £50 in a card after having to shell out for accommodation/travel/outfits etc

Weddings have gone so ridiculous, the expectation people place on guests (especially the wedding party) is insane. As for those expecting large sums of money to cover to cost of the lavish, over-the-top wedding they have been stupid enough to whack on credit they can fuck right off.

This is a US wedding, not a UK one, though. It's the social norms there that should be paid heed to.