To think is over generous gift of money for a wedding present?

It's very generous of him but I personally find it a little vulgar. Definitely not necessary. Obviously there are worse traits he could have but I would try and get him to reign it in a bit if I was his partner tbh.

What a waste of money. Better off donating to a homeless shelter, food bank etc

This is completely normal in my circle of friends, £50 per couple was the amount that most guests gave at our wedding.
’Paying for your plate’ is something I’ve heard of in other cultures but not in the UK. I never once expected people to cover their cost at my wedding! MN is a completely different world sometimes…

Lol - you must move in very different circles to me @Twinkletoes127 I was happy with the company of my friends and family at my wedding - I can't remember what anyone gave as an individual present.

Wedding etiquette realistically you should cover the cost of your meal plus extra as a gift.
People on here having you think that £50 per person is enough, are wrong, and you would be viewed as stingy.
There are wedding gift calculators, that most of these people should probably take look at

We usually give £50 - I wasn't aware we had to cover the price of our meal... We don't have £100 spare unfortunately for gifts as I'm sure many families don't either

£100 per person is just enough. Per couple is not enough and if that's what you give when invited to a wedding, you might take a look at yourself

I've read some bollocks on this site over the years but this thread is right up near the top!!! It's like when you say you're going to Tenerife and your Billy Bullshit mate says, well I'm going to Elevenerife....

Flipping ‘eck, £100 is cheap?! I hope to god I don’t get invited to any weddings, I can’t afford it is £100 is considered tight!! 😬

100 quid is fine. A grand? Insane.

This isn’t about the wedding, OP is concerned about his general attitude to money, I’m not tight, but savvy.

My DH is quite frankly clueless about money, I run the household. Does your fella know how to pay bills, etc?

Obviously, different people earn different amounts of money, and can or can't afford lavish gifts, and I usually say each to their own.
But looking at what the op has said about her partner gifting a cousin £1k, it makes me wonder whether he's trying to buy their affections.
In contrast, when my sister got married, I gave her £30, and I was her MoH.

When my husband and I started dating he gave his friends daughter £250 for her 18th birthday. We’d only been dating about 5 months but lived together and I was like woah that’s a lot of money to gift to a child you don’t ever see and his friend has 5 more children! He didn’t think it was a lot at the time but after milking it over he said he should’ve considered talking to me about it as we share all the bills etc and has never done it again since. We talk about all of our expenses and if we’re thinking of buying something over £50 we will drop a message about it just to see if it’s worth it. We both earn a very good wage but I like to be sensible with money and he’s not that great with it. So he likes that I help keep a lid on his spending and he helps me be more relaxed. It’s a team effort

I guess it depends on your circumstances and your social circle. Me and my friends are low earners so that would be a ridiculous amount. But if you are all high earners then maybe not so. Only you can judge that. But to be fair it’s his family so for him to gauge.

I would be concerned that he is showing off by throwing money about and pretending he is very wealthy.

I have a friend who dated a man like this. It ended up that he was in huge amounts of debt and couldn’t keep up with his lifestyle.

you don’t want to end up married to the guy who throws his credit card on the table to buy everyone dinner, then goes home to a house that he can’t afford to heat.

I got married a few years ago, wedding roughly worked out about £100 per head. My office had a whip round and from 20+ people who signed the card £80 was contributed, no issues with that as lovely thought and they didn’t need to gift anything, but five of the people who signed the card were invited to the wedding 😂

Blimey! I hope he doesn’t have any more cousins. You’ll be bankrupt by the time they’re all hitched.
On the plus side, if he ever gets a mistress you’ll notice pretty quickly when the bills come in.

Far too much give what you can afford depending on relationship. If it is son or daughter if you hadn’t paid for wedding ok any thing less sister brother if they are hard up half otherwise a lot less

Hmm. Isn’t this relative? What you give is in relation to who etc?

We usually do £200. A younger family member (nephew) got married this summer, we have £1000. But we did the same for his two sisters who got married years ago!

He can give what he likes OP. Interesting you are considering marrying him. Has he actually asked you???

Thank you for saying this! We have two weddings to attend next month. One is a fully day, sit down wedding and one is a party have a separate wedding. I have never gifted that much. Last wedding we went to was last year and we gave £40 which was double what we used to give 10/15 years ago when we regularly attended weddings.

All the people saying 100 isn't enough are insane! It's plenty.

If it's 80 euro per meal and you're trying to scrape the wedding costs back from your guests you can't afford that wedding - sorry. It's not on the guests to pay for it, don't invite people who you can't afford to invite and don't choose venues and catering you can't afford to choose.

I grew up poor, I am now well off. I'd never dream of expecting people who I invited as my guests to be spending ridiculous sums. It's enough for them to attend and I wouldn't invite them if I expected monetary compensation.

1000 is obscene. If I received that much I'd think the person who gave it to me was an idiot! The only exception would be if the person who gave it was incredibly wealthy.

Good people don't judge what they receive - they are just grateful!

I've given what I can and sometimes it was less (£20 for an evening do) and sometimes it was more. Not more than £200 though!

Very close. Not really sure looking back, it was daft. Overly generous husband/felt slightly obliged. We had a lot to do with each other and.. I don’t know, I can’t really justify it. No not rich at all. Really not sure why we did, was totally stupid looking back.

Yes really

You gave a grand
You think it was two grand?
Really?
You don't know if it was 1000 or 2000
Really?

It’s mad. I didn’t even think about receiving gifts or money when I got married, I planned my day just as I wanted and invited those I wanted there with zero expectation of anything from them