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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Feels like there's way too many Men on MN

243 replies

Moonshine5 · 07/08/2024 22:46

I probably am being unreasonable however I'm on here primarily for female perspectives.

OP posts:
CurlewKate · 10/08/2024 09:01

Old people are mothers, grandmothers, aunts, go to carers. And women are still routinely marginalised and discriminated against. None of this applies to men!

Boomer55 · 10/08/2024 08:24

bragpuss · 08/08/2024 13:28

Has this theead not been deleted yet?

Sorry to hijack but does anyone think there's also way too many old people on MN? I'd start a thread but would expect it to have a life expectancy of about 10 seconds

Strangely, many older posters are Mums and Nans…some are in relationships, some not.

You don’t stop being a mum when you’re 60, and nor are we all senile….🙄

Qwertylife · 10/08/2024 08:10

Haha I never read if it's by a man (knowingly)

CurlewKate · 10/08/2024 08:08

Has a man ever been told he was "bleating" when he expressed an opinion?

Bellsandthistle · 10/08/2024 06:05

Tbh it’s quite easy to tell who the men and men’s hand-maidens are on this very thread. It’s those I would have excluded in an ideal world 😊

SSpratt · 10/08/2024 01:12

They mostly hang out on the sex and relationship threads, popping up with the ‘man here’ introduction and imparting their opinions. Easy enough to avoid.

80schildhood · 10/08/2024 01:08

I've been here for 15 years. Last week I got a private message from a male user I've never interacted with asking to "chat". That's never happened before.

SoupDragon · 10/08/2024 00:27

CurlewKate · 09/08/2024 23:37

@Bellsandthistle "Nobody is trying to ban men from mumsnet, but the pure frothing at the very idea women be allowed a space to discuss amongst ourselves is…revealing."

Indeed. Nothing more dangerous than women gathering together......

Except no one is frothing about that, they are simply pointing out that MN is not such a place.

SoupDragon · 10/08/2024 00:26

Fullyflavoured · 09/08/2024 23:32

What if a women had a genuine problem about sex? but instead of advice she gets pervy PMs from BigBoyDave? You want those men on MN? because I don't.

The problem is the moderation in the topic.

There was a big furore about the topic not that long ago and the general consensus of the people who used the topic was that they were happy with it.

SoupDragon · 10/08/2024 00:23

Fullyflavoured · 09/08/2024 23:28

It's still a part of MN and why should it be treated any different from the rest of MN? 'Well aware what it's like' isn't good enough. It's not a bloody separate site FFS.

Show quote history

Because that is what the sex topic is. Just like AIBU is "robust".

If there was no engagement from the willing female posters then it wouldn't
be happening would it?

CurlewKate · 09/08/2024 23:37

@Bellsandthistle "Nobody is trying to ban men from mumsnet, but the pure frothing at the very idea women be allowed a space to discuss amongst ourselves is…revealing."

Indeed. Nothing more dangerous than women gathering together......

coldcallerbaiter · 09/08/2024 23:34

I get a female vibe on many/most threads.

I do often see thread titles and think that is a man getting kicks, with loads of earnest responses.

Fullyflavoured · 09/08/2024 23:32

What if a women had a genuine problem about sex? but instead of advice she gets pervy PMs from BigBoyDave? You want those men on MN? because I don't.

Fullyflavoured · 09/08/2024 23:28

SoupDragon · 09/08/2024 23:23

So don't look at the sex topic. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I never do.

People who use that topic are well aware what it is like. The problem is the topic.

I've never come across it elsewhere other than the odd deleted troll post.

When these threads are started, the same posters always pop up bleating about how it's a women's site, ignoring the fact that is isn't and never has been. This is the point I was making.

Edited
Show quote history

It's still a part of MN and why should it be treated any different from the rest of MN? 'Well aware what it's like' isn't good enough. It's not a bloody separate site FFS.

SoupDragon · 09/08/2024 23:23

Fullyflavoured · 09/08/2024 23:17

No it has never been a women only site. But neither has it ever been a cheap hook up site full of pervs, which a quick look at the sex topic will tell you why some men post on MN.

Show quote history

So don't look at the sex topic. 🤷🏻‍♀️ I never do.

People who use that topic are well aware what it is like. The problem is the topic.

I've never come across it elsewhere other than the odd deleted troll post.

When these threads are started, the same posters always pop up bleating about how it's a women's site, ignoring the fact that is isn't and never has been. This is the point I was making.

Fullyflavoured · 09/08/2024 23:17

SoupDragon · 09/08/2024 23:09

Except that isn't what happened is it? No one set this up as a women only site, it has never been a women only site.

Show quote history

No it has never been a women only site. But neither has it ever been a cheap hook up site full of pervs, which a quick look at the sex topic will tell you why some men post on MN.

SoupDragon · 09/08/2024 23:09

CurlewKate · 09/08/2024 17:57

@Sux2buthen "They don't need to, they can join this one"

Yep. As usual-women make something and men move in on it....🤣

Except that isn't what happened is it? No one set this up as a women only site, it has never been a women only site.

Fluufer · 09/08/2024 19:18

DonnaHadDee · 09/08/2024 15:29

Very much the same here OP, I'm typically more interested in female perspectives, but of course anyone can and does join up. It would be a useful filter!

As a software developer, it's very easy to run some analysis tools and estimate the gender of the poster if they have any significant posting history. These tools are very accurate. I've used that to review some posts from time to time.

Let me tell you there are some well known mansplainers, especially in the politics and middle east area. I won't name them here, but a few of us have a virtual chuckle about them in PM. It is rather amusing :)

Shhh. We're supposed to pretend it's impossible to spot a man on the internet!

FrippEnos · 09/08/2024 19:03

Bellsandthistle · 09/08/2024 06:09

Well, we could start a “women only” website, but we’d only be accused of being “man-haters” 🤪 and would be immediately infiltrated by men, anyway.

Nobody is trying to ban men from mumsnet, but the pure frothing at the very idea women be allowed a space to discuss amongst ourselves is…revealing.

How would anyone know that you had set up a woman only website?
Presumably it would be private and something of an echo chamber.

ShiningforLeeBertie · 09/08/2024 18:32

I saw a man in Mothercare once, should I have called the police?

InterIgnis · 09/08/2024 18:30

Regrdless of the name, it’s not a site exclusively for women any more than it’s a site exclusively for parents 🤷🏻‍♀️

HowardTJMoon · 09/08/2024 18:11

CurlewKate · 09/08/2024 17:57

@Sux2buthen "They don't need to, they can join this one"

Yep. As usual-women make something and men move in on it....🤣

I believe it was more like "women make something and actively invite men in".

Sux2buthen · 09/08/2024 17:59

I think it's been stated it was co founded by a man as well.
At the end of the day, it's just an online chat forum, all are welcome as it should be

CurlewKate · 09/08/2024 17:57

@Sux2buthen "They don't need to, they can join this one"

Yep. As usual-women make something and men move in on it....🤣

romyindy · 09/08/2024 16:48

invisiblecat · 07/08/2024 23:03

If you are asking for recipes, have ingrowing toenails, need advice about estate agents, your cat has gone into labour in your airing cupboard, you have just been made redundant, your relative has died, your dog has eaten chocolate, you need to know a good hotel near the airport in Madrid or you baby just won't sleep, why on Earth would it matter?

You won't find many men on those threads. You'll find an abundance of them on dating threads, the relationship section, and, apparently, the sex topic (if that still exists).

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