Husband didn't tell me

100%!!
It’s sadly predictable.

Got to make it all about him, hasn't he?

He's lying. Whatever it is that he's actually trying to cover up, no idea. But he's taken your success, your achievement and turned it around so that you're upset and scared for him, rather than feeling good about yourself.

You can do better than this. He knows it and that's why he's done this - so that he distracts you away from your success.

And then next year will post

"We've just had our miracle baby after years of TTC and DH is saying he's going away on a stag do with his druggie mates for a week - can I trust him?"

And so the cycle goes....

"They are all childish and irresponsible idiots"

That includes your DH

Jesus fucking Christ.

Yep, it's all his best friend's fault 🙄

This is going to be one of those situations where the OP has put up with 15 years of the same shit, ignores all the advice to change and expect better for herself, and brings a baby into it. Unfortunately some people are conditioned so much it’s all they know.

You need to find your anger towards him. But you won’t.

@@northchesterforest I'm so sorry that this happened. Tbh this sounds like a terrible relationship. Taking drugs and troublesome drinking is a really bad thing, and I would be leaving this relationship. I'm not one of those people to say "LTB", but this really doesn't sound good at all.

It's shocking that his 'friends' didn't take him to hospital and then allowed him to put his own and others' lives at risk by driving the next day. Which is illegal, btw - your insurance will be invalidated if it came out he was driving after having had a seizure.

My DH had a seizure and it was terrifying to watch, and was taken v seriously at A&E. He's since had multiple brain and heart scans, and wasn't allowed to drive for a year. Thankfully he now has the all clear.

If my DH had so much coke and booze it triggered a seizure, surrounded by 'friends' who thought the best course of action would be not to get help (what were they doing they were so afraid to get help?!), and then he tried to hide it AND had such poor judgment he DROVE HOME afterwards I'd be seriously questioning my future with him. I wouldn't have kids with him, for sure.

You maybe need to consider whether he would be a good father for your child.

No, a good person does not repeatedly lie to his wife. He isn’t going to change.

The not sleeping thing....it's not insomnia, or guilt...it's doing coke. It's literally the thing coke is known for - keeping you awake. Do a load of coke and you won't sleep all night. and that can have negative affects. i don't know if he had a fit or if actually he had a panic attack or something from no sleep, increased heart rate. he may also have tried other drugs like pills or something. anyway - you need to trust him and he's not telling you the truth. but not sleeping after taking drugs is literally half the reason ppl do it.

I would also be worried he is gearing up for the “can’t remember what I did card”.

However, I have seen someone have a seizure from taking too much coke before. It was a few years ago when I was in uni and quite a few people were recreational drug users. The guy in particular took it every weekend along with other substances and used to get in a state. We were all worried because it would be jarring and dreadful to watch. This time he’d taken loads, was drenched in sweat, completely red and jaw swinging into another dimension. He looked psychotic. I’ve never seen anyone that bad. Then he started fitting. Luckily he got his parents involved and that was the end of that but he’d taken a LOT to get to the point of fitting.

The coke will be the half of it OP.

I hope he hasn’t driven since he had the seizure.

So sorry to hear you are going through this OP.
And now he’s adding to your stress in A and E with something entirely unavoidable.
It took me years to find out someone I was with was taking coke when we also had a ‘no drugs’ rule. I thought he had a serious mental health condition in the end. He also drank a lot and stayed out all night.
I was a lot, lot younger.
I do not miss those days one bit.
Please stop trying for a baby with this man.
If he feels under pressure now he’s not going to be around much if a baby comes along. No matter how much you want to be a parent.
He may be kind and loving when sober but when he has the choice, he chooses himself. He’s also sticking to a group of friends who are the same. He must at least be in his thirties.
It is very hard to leave someone you have probably spent a lot of your young life with. 15/16 years is a long time.
All I can say is I’m sorry I stuck around so long. I can’t regret it, it’s done, but I’m also glad we never had children.
It is possible to move on. It really, really is.

Haven't RTFT but has he informed the DVLA that he's had a fit (if he had indeed had one and it wasn't him trying to cover up just passing out). It will affect his driving licence if he has one.

It’s not normal to for when taking coke no. That would be a medical emergency and he should have been taken to hospital. There’s more to this than he is saying.

🙄

But well done on being the OPs chosen poster as this will be exactly what she wants to hear. The rest of us will be completely ignored!

Err no way in hell would I be TTC or thinking anyone who takes drugs is a good choice of parent for my child. Seriously he’s not up to it op. This would be a deal breaker for me!! He sounds about 18. I’d be done.

Why on earth would you want your baby to have this man as a father? You know drinking is a problem..it wont magically go away once the baby comes. Please read one of the billions of threads on here by people who have had a father like this and ask yourself what you are doing