To no longer respond to hints

Hahha oh my god I can't believe your OH has a little table by the side of his armchair too! - so does mine!!! It's his dumping ground.....the huffs and puffs are so bloody annoying aren't they 😂

I get ‘do you know where X goes’ and ‘do you have a plan for Y’ when really he means ‘can you put X away’ and ‘when are you going to deal with Y’ 😆

Mine is the same! Drives me round the bend. Literally yesterday sat eating dinner and he suddenly goes "I'm thirsty". I say "Get a drink then". "I can't get past because Xs chair". "Oh dear, I guess you're going thirsty or asking someone to either go get a drink for you or move". Stare off, because he knows how much it pisses me off but for some reason thinks asking will cause the world to end or his dick to drop off or something.

I have had this. The hinting. I feel it is so they haven't actually asked for help and so don't feel the need to be grateful?

Like a 'well, you offered'

Because if they asked - can you help me with... Can you make me... can you sort this... There would need to be a thankfulness from them and they just don't want to do that?

By not asking they are firstly not admitting they need your help and secondly getting help without actually requesting it. No need to be thankful.

That is my take on it. I just ignore hints or say 'do you need my help/need me to do something? You need to actually ask me'

I feel like I'm reading a thread from the Twilight Zone.

Brilliant 👏

I cannot stand this, and absolutely will not respond to this kind of thing. Drives me insane.

OMG, this is my DH to a T. Huffs and puffs and sighs with annoyance, when he can't find something he KNOWS he left on his little table at the side of his armchair. I have lost count of the amount of times this has happened over the past 10 years, and sometimes I eventually get up and help him search the house. Turns out the fecking thing is in a drawer of his in the bedroom! All I get is 'well I don't remember putting it there.' In other words, I must have put it there. (I didn't! HE did!)

Maybe I should! 😆

Omg yes, I used to get I've hoovered for you, I've taken the washing upstairs for you, I watered the plants for you. It was all for me, as if he was doing me some massive favour and wanted thanks for it.

Or even worse, he would watch me struggle with a heavy load or something, whilst sitting on his phone or pissing about doing something else. And if I mentioned it, he would say well why didn't you ask for help ?

I always tell DH that the washing machine is singing for him 🤣 he does nearly all the laundry.

I also tell him when I've done his chores for him. He does more than me.

It is in jest but it's probably irritating after more than a decade!

My DH tried this and got an ear bashing.

Recently I came back from a weekend away.
DC 17 & 18 told me DH had said “I’ve hoovered for your mum.”

When I question DH he panicked and said “What I said was I’ve hoovered because it makes you happy.”

Oh not because it’s our home and we should all be keeping to clean then?

I would presume if people never start responding to hints then they will soon stop? It sounds a bit martyr like to go along with it

If my DH has a complaint he says “Why have people moved my wallet,” or “Why haven’t people made me any tea?” Or whatever he’s moaning about.

By people he means me. Just me. No one else. I am people. SO I do exactly the same. Never refer to him as you, always as people 😂

Omg this thread is great....... only this evening about 3 hours ago I was asked what "I" had done with "his" car insurance letter that had been sat on the living room table for the last month...... I've no idea darling.......cue the harrumphs and sound of drawers being opened and shut and paper being flicked through.......apparently it HAS to be found NOW!.....yes dear.........

If you can’t beat him join him. Tell him about every bit of housework you do “for him”. In our house this is a running joke every time I do the dishwasher I tell my partner I did it “for him”.

This drives me mad. The unfinished sentences with the “fill in the blank” really get me. I’m pretty good now at saying, “I don’t know.” to every question about where something is, and if it isn’t phrased as a question, for example, “I can’t find my glasses…”, I don’t even answer at all. I’ve become a hard nosed bitch.

My DH doesn't hint at me to do things for him, but it does say equally annoying things.

For example. I'll go out shopping - or out to meet a friend, and I'm out for like, three hours ... When I come back, he's done the washing and drying up and put the washing on and hung it out. (Doesn't do it very often. Maybe twice a month.) He tells me he's done it as soon as I step foot in the house.

I just say, 'Oh, that's great. Thanks.' Then he says, 'you didn't mind me doing the washing up for you, did you?' and 'you didn't mind me doing the washing for you, did you?' He's obviously after me saying, 'no, of course not. I'm actually really grateful and happy that you did it' with a big grateful happy smile!

But all he gets from me is, 'why the hell would I mind you doing the washing up, and the washing, which, you know, is pretty much 50% yours?!' He basically tries to fish for compliments. And when he does household tasks, he always says that he's done them for me. He says 'I've run the hoover around the house. Saved you a job.' with a big smile, and eagerly awaiting thanks and praise.

It’s so annoying! I deliberately ignore hints and suggestions from both DH and DC, both told frequently that if they want me to do something they need to ask clearly and directly. DC is pretty good now, DH still looks mortally wounded that I’m not charmed by his approach 😬

Husband: Have we sent a birthday/get well/whatever card to (insert one of his relative’s name)?
Me: What’s all this ‘we’ business?
Husband: 😶

I get...

Do you want to (insert thing he wants me to do)

I say. No.

My dh says things like 'we really need to sort that cupboard' (he means me)

I now agree yes we do and do it if I planned /want to. Otherwise no one does it.

"Please don't block the machine if others want to use it for their own laundry."