To feel uncomfortable with groom's speech at his wedding?

Poor bride, how sad and humiliating for her.

I don't think I've ever heard a bad groom's speech - they are usually safe and bland. Have witnessed some shit best men's speeches though these weren't directly insulting to the bride but went on and on about tedious drinking exploits.

I'm sadly in the company of some of the other posters who's dad made a disparaging speech about them. Mine started off OK with a funny story from when I was little and I thought this will be ok. But it quickly morphed into thanking my husband for "taking me on" (I'd not lived with or been supported by my parents for years by this point) followed by things like "good luck to him, that's not an easy task". There was just no need for it. I wasn't expecting him to sing my praises (that would never happen!) but congratulations to you both on this happy day wouldn't have pained him too much!

My cousin got married less than a year later and her dad made such a lovely speech, pitched just right and not too long. It made me feel really emotional. I was happy for her but it also made me think I must be such a horrible person that even my own dad couldn't find a single nice thing to say about me on my wedding day.

I'm still married 24 years later so my poor husband didn't find taking me on too awful after all.

My BIL made an appalling best man’s speech at our wedding. I found his printout of it when clearing the house during the divorce, and got upset all over again. I hadn’t realized or had blotted out how rude and horrific it actually was. He insulted me, my family, where I am from. So so grim.

The main topic of his speech was how he hadn't wanted to marry but she did and so here he was with his arm twisted behind his back.

As they say, when someone tells you who they are, believe them.

She needs to get out of that but I wouldn't worry, he'll probably do it for her.

What an arsehole.

Most people are just not good at making speeches, he probably thought it was funny.

The last wedding I went to the best man clearly thought he was hilarious but he came across as very nervous and most of the ‘jokes’ fell flat. We still have him a good round of applause because it’s hard to stand up in front of a room full of people.

What a stupid post. My partner is the most amazing person I’ve ever met, but I still don’t want to get married or have kids. Making huge sweeping generalisations is really lazy thinking. Some women, and some men for that matter, just don’t want children, I’m sorry you find something simple, so difficult to understand.

I think speeches say a lot about a person. They can come across quite toxic. It seems he wanted to impress his friends more than his bride. My dad’s speech was short and he was uncomfortable doing it. But I felt he tried to laugh at me rather than with me. I didn’t find it funny. Plus we had a difficult relationship. In hindsight I wouldn’t have bothered with speeches. They seem more for laughs than love.

‘ be grateful to her for keeping him out of the dating pool.‘

Not necessarily, unfortunately.

Really? Ive been married for 15 years, still madly in love. We married when we were both 20 and never wanted kids. Are you saying we aren't and never have been really in love?

Could be dry humour. Maybe you didn't get it? In any case, no one really knows what a couple is like when they are by themselves. My job has taken me to many weddings and I have seen all sorts.

Oh dear....I don't think that marriage will last long. Trouble is, once all the preparations are under way and everything is organised, it can be difficult to say, 'Sorry, I don't want to go through with this'.

I speak from experience!

Stalking! What

I’ve never seen someone project quite as much as you do.

Clearly you wanted marriages and kids with someone who didn’t want you, they’ve moved on with someone else and you’re stuck with this anger. Get therapy and move on.

I've been to two weddings where the speeches made me cringe. In one the groom referenced the fact that they had split up before the wedding, but got back together and carried on with the wedding plans. The other one the groom apologised in front of everyone for cheating on the bride. Both are now divorced.

Goodness talk about over thinking and over investing, to move to psycho analyzing this man based on a few lines is so off.

Of course he will have a Shakespeare sonnet for the right person, he does not see her as worthy of a sonnet. Same goes for people who 'will never marry' - the moment they meet the right person, they will. Or the ones 'let us live for each other, children are a scourge' - as soon as they really fall in love, they will want to have children with that person.

My cousins grooms speach was so grim I had to take one of my kids out as I was cringing so much. All about their sex life and her wiping his arse when he had been ill. I'm sure some people loved it but not for me.

Bils brother also gave a horrific speech at sisters wedding. He turned out to be a right horrifically repulsive perv so no wonder Benny Hill humour appealed to him. Like kids finding poo and bum jokes hilarious. Sign of their intelligence and maturity.

However thank god cousin has got much better since kids. He actually has done amazing speeches since god live him.

Because he made a misogynistic speech, you want to make him a victim?! There is absolutely nothing to imply he is being abused for god sake, if he was, he wouldn’t be embarrassing his wife publicly, for fear of the backlash later.

Sound like a case of bad nerves.

Christ stop over thinking it, he’s an arse who thought he was being funny. Just your average dickhead.

Take them with a pinch of salt !

This can’t be a serious post, surely? He sounds like your common or garden arsehole.

@Dygger heading to Edinburgh festival (with my husband and our son) - FWIW, my husband ripped the piss out of me gently in his speech but closed on “Piglet - you make my day, every day”. Bit cheesy, but quite sweet. 9 years married this month.

He sounds like an arrogant arsehole. What play’s he in? Rotten tomatoes should be easy to get hold of in preparation for my attendance.

Mmm there's a bit of projection here. How do you know the speech was "wry, clever, deliberately understated" - PP doesn't describe the speech in any of those terms, and doesn't refer to 'warmth of feeling' either. It seems like you just want everyone to pile on the groom for some reason. No it doesn't sound funny, nor particularly original, but it was 10 minutes of his whole life.