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To wonder why more parents don't encourage daughters to freeze eggs?

358 replies

alesndra · 04/08/2024 13:00

I know , I know - money! But there's so many more parents that help out their children by buying them housing or contributing large sums towards the wedding. Why isn't egg freezing a more common "gift"?

For example, I grew up quite comfortable and my parents wanted to help me build up a safety net. When I finished uni they bought me a flat in central London (for which I am immensely grateful) and paid a substantial amount towards my wedding (again, very very thankful for this). So they clearly have money and were willing to use it to help me out in life. Similarly now, I've mentioned we might do IVF and parents have said if they can help out financially they are very willing. So... why is it that so few girls are encouraged by their parents at age 18-25 to freeze eggs by their parents? Why, among all of my friends, even ones who went to private school and come from super rich backgrounds, have none of us been "gifted" an egg freezing round but many got flats etc? Not ungrateful but just wondering why culturally it's not as common when it could save so many tears, stress and even money down the line to be used on unsuccessful IVF rounds as egg quality declines?
I feel like this is 100% something I would "gift" my daughter, ahead of for example cars or flats. Or am I missing something?

OP posts:
JudgeBurrito · 04/08/2024 13:04

All of the above, but also the fact that women having their first babies later is quite a recent cultural phenomenon. I'm 34 and it wouldn't have occurred to my parents when I was 18 that I wouldn't just do the same as them and get married mid 20s and have a baby immediately.

Carebearsonmybed · 04/08/2024 13:04

As far as I'm aware egg freezing isn't ideal. It has problems and a high rate of abnormality & miscarriage. It also involves very invasive, painful and dangerous medical intervention.

If you are going to freeze anything it's better with embryos but that takes a willing partner, who will then have a lifelong hold on you/your fertility.

I've encouraged DCs to have DCs in their 20s and plan careers etc around that.

alesndra · 04/08/2024 13:04

I have had egg retrieval, so I am aware what the procedure involves. Just that whilst doing it I thought so many times "if only I had 18 year old me's eggs"...

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Womanofcustard · 04/08/2024 13:03

Because it’s a horrible procedure by all accounts.

Loopytiles · 04/08/2024 13:03

It has some health risks, is not that effective in terms of odds of a live birth, expensive, including ongoing costs, and is not something warranting unsolicited parental advice IMO

KimberleyClark · 04/08/2024 13:03

Because it’s very expensive, uncomfortable and invasive, there is no guarantee of success and it’s not some magical way of stopping g the biological clock?

OrangeSlices998 · 04/08/2024 13:02

Because the procedure to retrieve the eggs isn’t easy or straightforward, neither is using those eggs down the line when you want to have kids.

alesndra · 04/08/2024 13:02

And I'm not questioning why 18-25 year olds don't do that themselves because... 18 year olds are rarely thinking about that type of thing and , at least for me, I don't think I was mature or life experienced enough to think that far ahead!

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