To be panicking about DC’s employability post uni?

Christ, back the fuck off. She is her early twenties, she has years to work out what she wants to do. May be she doesn't want to waste her precious 20s on the miserable toxic treadmill of making a Big Four firm even richer.

Many career paths are not linear and a lot of us map our own career paths rather than following a set one created by the big finance/managment consultancy firms

I did a "soft" degree at a RG university. As the first in my family to go to university there were no expectations or any guidance.

What I did was take the summer off move back home and work a temp job in tourism and generally have a fun summer. I then moved to a shitty flatshare on the outskirts of London with friends and temped (eg post room, admin, reception, canteen) at a lot of blue chip companies - which was invaluable in terms of office experience. I was interested in history so got a job as a trainee researcher in a local authority archive. It was great fun and I made some of my closest friends there but after 3 years realised that the career paths open to me there - basically training to be an archivist, librarian or data specialist - were not for me.

So I took a sideways move to a small charity to gain some policy development experience. After 6 years of lowish pay but amazing experience I moved to a government body in a pure policy role. I moved out again to a national charity to gain more social policy experience and then moved back in the public sector to work a differebt policy (somewhere along the way I also worked for the European Commission and in the Civil Service). Now I am in a fairly senior role working in economic regulation.

I can afford a decent life in London and bought a flat in my mid thirties. No skiiing holidays or private schooling alas.

If you're in law then surely you know that half the people in the profession have a non law degree and come from a wide range of academic backgrounds?

Possibly a moot point if your daughter doesn't want to do law, but it's proof that even in the corporate world you can get pretty far with any decently respected degree. I don't see why having a degree in anthropology makes you any less employable than having a degree in English or history, and I know plenty of people with English and history degrees who have gone on to have great careers in a diverse range of fields.

But I do think perhaps you need to back off a little and give your daughter the space to figure out what she's interested in and might want to do. You've got her to adulthood with a good degree. The rest is up to her.

I think you need to take a massive step back from trying to engineer the future career of an independent adult woman in her 20s.

You aren’t the parent of an 11-year-old trying to get her into grammar school. You are really infantilising her by trying to find career paths for her and looking up dates for internship programmes etc.

I would absolutely employ someone with an anthropology degree - or any other degree - if they could tell me why they wanted a job in my team, talk about their transferable skills from their holiday job as a barista/nanny/whatever, and perform well enough in an interview task (which in my field would usually be a planning/brainstorming task followed by a request to produce a piece of writing for a specific audience).

I would NOT employ the sort of person whose parents were planning their career or researching opportunities for them. I have zero interest in someone who has been pushed into applying or following a career by their helicopter parents. That would apply if they were 16, let alone if they were in their bloody 20s.

I'm with you OP.

I am involved in graduate recruitment and it is incredibly competitive and we all know getting a foothold in a stable lucrative profession can be inportant. I know accountants who have become financial directors who have retired in their early 50s to pursue less intense careers or enjoy the pursuit of hobbies or other life interests. They have houses and investments that give both themselves a good lifestyle and family financial security.

Why go into a public sector role like teaching with really quite poor prospects unless you enter management and judging by MN with many wishing to leave. Similarly with nursing etc.

I think at our age we can see how lack of focus from a career perspective from.a wide eyed fresh graduate can lead to regret in later life.

@FannyCann Read all the OP's replies... The OP's family are Londoners. It's not about ending up there, it's about wanting to stay in her home city. Nothing wrong with that!

While I'm somewhat 🙄 at this fear of the erm provinces there's no other city in the UK and possibly the world comparable to London. It's a metropolis and so big that a lack of safety in certain areas can't be extrapolated to the entire city.

A couple of last comments - I hope youve been reassured there are many many routes open to your dd, which will pay reasonably well, suit her personality and that she isn't on the back foot for.

I will add though that I strongly believe your 20's are the age where you can spend a few years working things out, travelling, doing grunt jobs, trying grad schemes, quitting because it's not what you wanted, spending a couple of years in Australia etc. If you can't do those things when you're young with no children or mortgage, when can you. And you should - cos you're a long time in work.

Finally does she know you're posting - you've told us her very niche course and effectively which uni she is at - it would be quite easy for anyone who knows her to work out who she is from this thread.

Crikey OP Panicking and spiralling? Take a step back to be proud of your daughter and her achievements and trust in her ability to find her own path as she sounds more than capable.

I'll tell you about my DD, also a hard worker/high achiever. The only help she had from me was getting her first pub job age 16 when she was on study leave for her AS levels. I noticed the pub up the road from her school was having a recruitment morning and suggested she go. She had a fit, study blah blah, no cv etc. I did her CV that night and dropped her off at 8am, they offered a trial shift and she was in, never looked back. It was a great first job, local gastro pub group, doing really well back then. I let her take an afternoon off school Drs appointment for a wine training afternoon. I think they had forgotten she was only 16. They learnt about the wines they sell, how to present them and up sell, how to cork them and might have done a bit of tasting too. She won employee of the month several times, gifting us a free meal at the fine dining pub in the group among other prizes. The best thing was when it was time to leave to move on to Uni she was able to pass on her job to DD2, a shy and diffident girl who would never have survived an interview and trial shift but trained up by her sister got stuck in and also benefited hugely from working for the group. Also whenever she was home in the holidays there was always work available for DD. She's been great about working, earning money and paying her way.

Onto uni and a 1st from RG uni in international relations with quantitative methods. She graduated in 2020 and graduate job plans evaporated with covid. So she, her boyfriend and a few others headed to Spain with some company (can't remember who) that organised teaching assistant jobs for them. She spent two years there, very low pay but had a great time overall, learnt another language (fluent) and picked up a TEFL qualification along the way. Although some aspects of lockdown were very strict in Spain overall they had a better time there than here, her school was near a beach and she could swim all year round, keen climbers they were able to get out of the cities for long hikes and climbing and still managed to see lots of art galleries and other sights.
At the end they went to Italy and worked in a summer camp in the mountains, lots of taking children hiking, mountain biking, climbing and other sports. The best thing was they went there as vegans, but all food and accommodation was part of the deal and with no opportunity to self cater they shut up and put up and discovered / rediscovered the joys of cheesy pizza, bolognese and tiramisu. Made my life so much easier for cooking when she came home!
Back home she slotted back in with the pub group managing one of the pubs whilst putting in job applications.
She didn't pursue one of the big banks after being interviewed online by some scruffily dressed chap working from his bedroom with a rumpled bed in the background.
She got a 2 1/2 year training contract with a data management company, a few months intense training at the main office followed by industry secondments. She currently earns what OP might think low compared to banking and law, but it's more than junior doctors get as they head out to the wards. Every secondment she's been on they have tried to poach her and offered jobs at double her current salary, so heading towards OPs expectations but she obviously wants to complete the training contract and also would have to repay a significant sum of money if she left before the end.

So apart from booting her into the pub that morning she's done it all herself and is doing well.
Of her friends from uni who graduated same time as her several were poleaxed by lockdown etc and accepted low level jobs in things like local housing Dept and stuck together where they were. I worried for them that they would find themselves in a rut working well below their abilities. But they are all doing well, her close group have all ended up in London so they are all together again, one has joined DD's company on same training scheme, the one who was in housing is now in civil service policy development doing work around domestic violence and climbing the ladder.

As for banking. The son of some wealthy distant relatives through marriage went to the same uni as DD at the same time. She said he was always drunk or high on drugs whenever she happened to see him at student events. He never did a single days work/internship unless you count desultory hitting tennis balls with children at the village summer tennis camp. Probably bigged that up on his cv. 🙄After extended holiday at home following graduation somehow a job appeared in the city thanks to Dad's contacts so off he went to become a banker. 🤷‍♀️

Anyway whatever they earn labour are going to tax us all to the hilt and I've no idea why OP thinks ending up in London is a life goal.
None of DDs group plan to stay there. Knife crime is a constant worry. One of DD's colleagues was walking back to his flat one night, in a group of five when they were approached by a man and a woman. Wrongly thought 5:2 wins. The man punched them to the ground while the woman transformed into a stabbing ninja. It's a miracle none of them died. One chap was stabbed several times. Her friend blocked a stab to the face/eye with his hand and severed tendons affecting his ability to type with that hand. He supposedly lived in a decent area but there was another killing on the street so he's moved somewhere hopefully safer.

To PP who said work romance doesn't happen, it's happened to DD, lovely chap on the same scheme as her.

Relax OP. Encourage your daughter to travel if she never had a gap year or even if she did. Take time. Do fun stuff. Enjoy life while she's young free and healthy. She'll be fine.

But you don't have to bankroll her if you don't want to. You need to make your expectations clear, also not impose your judgement of what's best for her. Impose a deadline on her moving our after graduation.

Even if she moves out at 23, has a few years living on her own and all the expenses that entails. She might get that high paid job after all! Or not, move back in a few years later, save and get a flat deposit. Or move abroad.

She's extremely unlikely to be struggling financially in the long-term with you as a safety net. But you want to be the safety net, not the default option.

I mean, she has worked, so she has a good work ethic but it's for pin money presumably. If you've been paying for all the big stuff during her studies, it's time for her to do that herself.

Not sure what your point is here. I clearly distinguished between people who need the money - like me (no rich parents, no London home to live in rent free). And those who don't. Like OP's daughter, and possibly yours.

It's not about what's good for society it's what you as an individual want to achieve.

In 2024 it's very difficult to get a secure roof over your head if you don't earn well relatively early, especially in London. 20 years ago my colleagues came back to the UK after 3 years of travel in Australia, walked into a corporate job and bought a property immediately. You can't do that these days. You need thousands of pounds in savings for the deposit.

We all make decisions based on our circumstances. And, as we mature, find out what we like about the working world.

Personally I started in finance, went into tech and have worked across every sort of company imaginable. Young people get starry eyed about social justice, but charities, 'social enterprises' etc all can have the same problems with politics, bad managers, etc as any other company. Equally, a lot of creative people I know quit because they spent more time dealing with other mundane work stuff.

What about doing an internship abroad through someone like Bunac? Widen her horizons, give her a breather and get some work experience too.

bunac.org/internships

Yes, I was going to suggest academia if she is passionate about her subject.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm really working class, and then along come these threads to remind me that I absolutely am.

You sound completely unhinged. The 'tier 1' route you discuss is open to so few privileged young adults it's untrue. It wasn't considered by a single person I knew. Funnily enough we all have successful careers and haven't had to resort to Onlyfans yet.

I did a 'soft' degree at an excellent University, and my classmates are now a mixture of academics, 2 working for the UN, charities, in social policy, teaching, media. Would any of those really be so awful?!

It's completely normal to not know what you want to do at 20 isn't it? Is this why I don't have a Tesla?!

I think you have a very narrow idea of what her life should look like with your "small flat in London" plan.
Is any of this what she wants or what you want?

I live in the North West, 3 adult Nieces who all got decent enough degrees and are friendly, hardworking and personable. They didn't "tick boxes" in the way you are describing yet they have always worked and now all own their own homes and have a job they enjoy.

Your dd may well have a plan of her own but is not sharing it with you because she's struggling to breathe due to all the plans you're making for her.

I get that you're well-intentioned but step back and let her find her own way.

Maybe HR or Corporate Responsibility might suit her? I work in broadcasting and there are lots of interesting jobs connected to programming research which might also suit her skill set?

I think it’s really important to not make comparisons with those of us who are older (I’m late 40’s) to people entering the job market today.

i have friends with degrees in classics, anthropology and ancient history- now two teachers and a very successful journalist. My partner runs a marketing agency- on a degree in medieval history.

teaching still seems an option of course, but my journalist friend said that her multi national agency would recruit from a massive pool of graduates with a degree and masters in journalism.

my partner also recruits a couple of times a year - only interviews people with a degree/masters in marketing plus internships or similar. Because there are so many applications with a specific degree now.

its not the same as ‘when I were young’ and it raises unrealistic expectations to suggest it is.

probably the best thing for your DD OP would be to maybe take a gap year, travel, then apply for some work experience in various areas until something clicks - then do a relevant masters.

I think your priory needs to be stepping back, taking a deep breath, and dealing with what appears to be the biggest problem here..... Your spiralling anxiety over your Daughters future. She's young, there are years and years for her to find out who she is and what she wants to do. I'm 46 and honestly, all the people I know earning the most with lucrative and high flying careers got there by life experience rather than qualifications.

You really need to take a step back before you make your Daughter with her 2:1 degree feel like a failure before she's even started.

What are those paths though? As you might have guessed from my post, my world is quite limited to finance. I am actually happy she is not doing it - I have seen enough women chewed up and spat out in these roles - but I am not familiar with what else is out there (that is not STEM/finance/law) that pays enough to have a semi-decent quality of life in London.
I'm quite mystified that someone who seems to have their own good career cannot imagine there are other paths and employment other than your own.
Do you think the whole world is employed in finance and law??
A degree in Anthropology isn't a pathway to any of those.

I assure you it was not mostly luck. But sure - woman supporting woman and all that. Couldn’t have possibly worked my butt off, Networked networked networked and made opportunities for myself. In the cut throat world of an American tech company - you don’t make it based on luck. Your performance is constantly monitored. I say a little luck as my friend initially told me about the entry level data entry position that I started at on minimum wage.

I wouldn't recommend Big 4 /Big accountancy career to ant sane person wputh minimal IQ in place. Whether they train in comms or not.
That aside, the OP is just that, interested and anxious to me but hands-off parenting is not my style.

wow, she sounds amazing. Can I swap her for one of my kids?!

I agree with the PPs saying leave her be. She’s an adult, she chose her degree and she’s responsible for her own career planning.
You’re using words like tailspin, spiralling and freaking out. I understand that you’re anxious about her future but this level of reaction from you is way OTT. You can’t do this for her.

Public as opposed to corporate law could be her thing. Lots of opportunities for advocacy and social justice work if she trained as a barrister. From what you say she has the passion and commitment to persevere with cases such as her friend.
https://www.matrixlaw.co.uk/practice-areas/public-law/civil-liberties-human-rights/