Page 13 | do you and DH share your locations on your phones?

buggeroo · 2024-08-03T15:02:32+00:00

just curious really. DH and I have never done this, and I wondered if that is the norm?

Bluebirdover · 03/08/2024 19:06

@blueshoes oh give over.....

If you noticed that the "app" turned off you'd be all over it checking all the time.

I never ever need to check my DH, total trust and glad I'm not you, because you're either distrustful or paranoid.

blueshoes · 03/08/2024 19:05

Bluebirdover · 03/08/2024 19:02

Oh yeah literally thousands of dead people have been found by tracking.....

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Another good reason not to location share. Keep scraping.

BobnLen · 03/08/2024 19:04

I'm glad there wasn't tracking when I was young so my parents could see where I was when I had hitchhiked to go out somewhere miles away.

PommelHoss · 03/08/2024 19:04

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blueshoes · 03/08/2024 19:03

Bluebirdover · 03/08/2024 18:59

@blueshoes but surely turning your stalking app off would signify an affair?

I don't understand your analogy of a second phone, the first one would still show where you are?

No. Turning on and off does not signify an affair because I am not checking all the time and might not spot it. Even if I did, there will be periods where the app loses signal anyway. Far more reliable is to watch change in habits and behaviour of the partner, you know, like the old fashioned way.

As for second phone, it is more inconvenient, but leave the first phone in the office (to give impression of being hard at work) and go out with second mistress phone. Some people have one phone for work and one phone for personal. So leave the location sharing phone and use the other one.

Bluebirdover · 03/08/2024 19:02

blueshoes · 03/08/2024 18:42

@BruFord I am 56 so older than you. When I started work, it was fax and pre-email 😱

If the tech is useful, I adopt it. don't think it is the thin end of the wedge re: erosion of privacy because of the consent element. Am I the only one who takes the extra clicks to reject cookies? I do like the personal safety element of location tracking. It may not bring me back alive but I'd hope they'd at least find my body!

Oh yeah literally thousands of dead people have been found by tracking.....

Bluebirdover · 03/08/2024 19:00

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👏 👏

BiteyShark · 03/08/2024 19:00

Ummm are people taking about different location tracking?

We use find my phone to track our location.

sunsetsandboardwalks · 03/08/2024 19:00

blueshoes · 03/08/2024 18:16

You have an active imagination.

A good reminder to teach dd to spot an abuser. I don't think she has lost her mind just because she shared her location with her parents once upon a time.

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I don't think I have an active imagination - I've read enough threads on here to know that using apps to control/spy on your partner is scarily common. From both sides - men and women.

blueshoes · 03/08/2024 18:59

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Just occurred to me this expression is quite misogynistic and of its time.

Are women only allocated a finite amount of speaking time because we are meant to keep quiet?

Bluebirdover · 03/08/2024 18:59

@blueshoes but surely turning your stalking app off would signify an affair?

I don't understand your analogy of a second phone, the first one would still show where you are?

sunsetsandboardwalks · 03/08/2024 18:58

PoetryPlease · 03/08/2024 18:22

Because I talk to her about what is and isn't acceptable in a relationship? She wouldn't even see me and DH do it because although technically we have the ability too, we very rarely do. So if someone she knew was going on about it then it wouldn't look normal to her. Because we've had conversations about the ethics of location sharing already. It's an interesting topic.

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Fair enough. I suspect most families don't do that, though.

There are lots of people on here saying entire families share locations - so I'd wonder how those people would normalise it one sense, but advise against it another. I agree that it's interesting and personally think the lines between "acceptable" and "controlling" can be crossed far too easily with this kind of technology.

Commonsense22 · 03/08/2024 18:57

I am utterly baffled at how bitter / conspiracy theorist / judgemental etc the posts are from people who choose not to share their location. Nobody is asking you to.

The posts are really unhinged? Literally why do you care what others do of they find it helpful? Are you projecting your own insecurities on it?

sunsetsandboardwalks · 03/08/2024 18:56

behindthemall · 03/08/2024 18:15

You think this will only be the issue in this abusive relationship?

I suspect the abuser will be abusive regardless of whether or not she shares her location and regardless of whether the abuser even asks for it.

If it acts another red flag to get out of the relationship, then she should end it and I’d encourage her to do so.

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Where did I say it would be the only issue?

I'm saying that if something like this starts being seen as "normal" in the vast majority of relationships, then it's an easy way for an abuser to get their claws into someone new. If you start by using normalised methods of communication and control, it becomes harder for people to notice the red flags - the boiling frog method, so to speak.

Bluebirdover · 03/08/2024 18:56

BiteyShark · 03/08/2024 18:53

Oh yes forgotten how many times DH has asked me to see if his phone is still at work because he can't find it at home 😁

Find my phone..

Useful app

Bluebirdover · 03/08/2024 18:56

FrancisSeaton · 03/08/2024 18:55

Exactly only couples who trust each other share locations with each other.

Wonder what you non-tracking couples are up to 😂

On the contrary the only couple I know who track each other have both had affairs

Well that's no surprise really.

Bluebirdover · 03/08/2024 18:55

fdsgfd · 03/08/2024 18:49

We share locations. We find it useful to know where our phones are. Was helpful when ...

Teen left theirs on bus
Teen dropped theirs in town
I left mine at work

Find my phone does the same without tracking.

FrancisSeaton · 03/08/2024 18:55

Exactly only couples who trust each other share locations with each other.

Wonder what you non-tracking couples are up to 😂

On the contrary the only couple I know who track each other have both had affairs

BruFord · 03/08/2024 18:54

blueshoes · 03/08/2024 18:42

@BruFord I am 56 so older than you. When I started work, it was fax and pre-email 😱

If the tech is useful, I adopt it. don't think it is the thin end of the wedge re: erosion of privacy because of the consent element. Am I the only one who takes the extra clicks to reject cookies? I do like the personal safety element of location tracking. It may not bring me back alive but I'd hope they'd at least find my body!

@blueshoes Fair enough, it’s just personal preference. I’ve always loved my privacy so prefer not to be tracked nor track others.

BiteyShark · 03/08/2024 18:53

Oh yes forgotten how many times DH has asked me to see if his phone is still at work because he can't find it at home 😁

blueshoes · 03/08/2024 18:51

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A sign of someone who has nothing useful to add to the argument. How about pick up on my grammar.

fdsgfd · 03/08/2024 18:49

We share locations. We find it useful to know where our phones are. Was helpful when ...

Teen left theirs on bus
Teen dropped theirs in town
I left mine at work

Prolapsedanus · 03/08/2024 18:48

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Flibflobflibflob · 03/08/2024 18:47

Yes the roads where we were living at the time of my first pregnancy were pretty dangerous so I asked DH to allow me to location track him for my own sanity. We just carried on after that. It’s helpful when trying to track him down in a mall sometimes or where he is if I need to start dinner.

I don’t think it bothers either of us tbh, we aren’t exciting people and I don’t feel the need for privacy. Fairly sure Dh doesn’t bother checking in on me at all.

blueshoes · 03/08/2024 18:46

AGoingConcern · 03/08/2024 18:44

Trusting each other to tell the truth & communicate info a partner needs without needing independent evidence to verify 🤷🏼‍♀️

For people who are happy to leave tracking on all the time, you do you. Neither choice tells you anything about a relationship in isolation.

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Exactly. I said it cuts both ways. The trust issue is a red herring.