To think she's gearing up to cancel?

I'd be backing out. Way too young to go away with another family, especially one who you have such limited contact with.

Wow, that is young to go away with a friend. I wouldn't leave my kid more than a few hours with a friend at that point.

Please don't cancel @SunflowerMabel . Your dd would be disappointed and she'll probably have a whale of a time. Only you'll know if your dd will be OK without you for that length of time, but she'll probably be so busy having a great time that she won't have opportunity to miss you.

You do need to speak to the other mum ASAP though.

This is AIBU so people are being unnecessarily harsh, calling you a mug etc.

You tried to do a nice thing for your DD and got caught off guard a bit. I can see why you thought this would be good for DD - and chances are it would.

Dont beat yourself up about it - you sound like a great mum. All any of us can do is what seemed okay at the time - nobody has a crystal ball. Hope it works whatever happens.

If she mentioned it a few weeks ago I can't see why she would cancel now

If she has already paid for the holiday ,then your £300, is long gone ,weather she goes or doesn't
Your not going to get that money back
That's why she's not been contacting u

I hope you get sorted soon. Bad form on the mother's part ignoring you.

OP, this thread reads as though you are reconsidering your decision for DD to go because of posters on this thread saying that 5 is so young.

It is young, but you know your daughter and how she is around the other child and her mum. And if she has happily had sleepovers before and you are able to pick her up early if needed (not in the middle of the night - she may have to wait but would be safe and looked after) then that is a perfectly fine decision. Particularly as you mention her missing out sometimes due to siblings care needs.

I would call the mum this morning. Rather than waiting overthinking until this evening.

I would not be comfortable sending a child this young away with another family, although I appreciate only you know yourself if you're happy with it or not. If you cancel yourself then I'd ask for the money back. If part of the money is for her food/ expenses, then surely they can give you that part of it back at least.

Just ring her now, @SunflowerMabel

Hi-just wanted to catch up with you about Bultins on Monday-can’t believe it’s come round so quickly! Can you run things through with me so I know the timings and what to pack?

If your DD is happy to go and you're confident that she'll cope just fine without you there then I would send her. She'll have a ball. That's if she's still invited obviously!
I'm another one who'd ring the mum this morning because if she bails on you, you need to let your daughter know asap.

Yes, thank you - I agree 👍

Absolutely @KateDelRick I didn’t mean any offence by quoting you, I liked your suggestion but just not that the OP should go straight into the conversation cancelling it, even if that’s what she wants to do.

Or course it can cost an extra £300, and extra bed means bigger room plus all food drink entertainment.

For Butlins it sounds reasonable.

Just phone her and ask if everything is still set. Don't Just cancel and upset both kids

OP did say £300 for food and accommodation, which does seem steep to be fair. Sounds like they wanted to rebook but we’re £300 short. I think if you offer to take someone else’s child on holiday you pay for it. It’s nice if the other parent offers to contribute but really, how much extra does it really cost to add on an extra 5 year old? Not £300

Her posts indicated a definite change of heart to me, but all things are open to interpretation, and my suggestion came with the best of intentions. I hope a discussion clarifies it to everyone's benefit.

I went away with neighbours and family friends at age 5 and 6, summer camp at 7. It was fine.

I don’t think she’s going to cancel and suspect she would be disappointed if you suggest it. She’s probably just very busy doing summer holiday stuff. Ring her and check “All still ok for Monday?” then check what she needs to bring etc.
If you hadn’t paid and/or it hadn’t been mentioned in months I’d think it’s off but as things stand I think it’s likely to still be going ahead. I hope your daughter has a fabulous time.

If you’re genuinely concerned about the set up then obviously your Dd shouldn’t go but as another poster said do not be put off by MN posters alone.

you know your DD and the other mum. MN do not and you have no idea whether you’re being influenced by a mum with similar attitudes and experiences to you or one that won’t let her children go to someone’s house unless she’s known the parent for at least 6 years, done a full background check and is able to check in via nanny cam every hour. When the child is 15

Sorry, just seen your update.

I'm in the let her go camp. She'll have a fun time with her mate and a caring responsible adult. It'll expand her horizons. And if she's miserable and hating it, you go and get her! Please give her the chance to do some fun stuff and ignore the finger waggers. If they choose not to do it, fine. Their prerogative. But your post wasn't about that - hope you hear back positively from the mum and hope your DD has a great time!

Oh, I thought she'd paid £300.

I agree. OP, don’t end up in a situation where you cancel ( unless you want to) and then don’t feel able to ask for the money back. Your friend has been unreasonable here in not being in touch to confirm, even if there are good reasons for that. I think your suggestion of waiting, but preparing your DD for the possibility it might not happen is a good one.

£45 a night that should read