To think she's gearing up to cancel?

And the original plan was that you'd go too? Which leads me to think she doesn't want to take your DD on her own but doesn't know how to tell you... I'd contact her and be honest. She will almost certainly be relieved!

It's very weird that she hasn't responded to you - even if she couldn't answer the phone you'd think she could manage a message saying 'can't talk right now, call back in a bit.' If she's not going to answer I'd be tempted to call round at her house when you know she's there. It's not as if you're being unreasonable - you've tried to contact her, it's quite a big thing for the children, and you've paid her £300. Paying £300 means she has no choice but to speak to you about it.

I don't think it's bad for your daughter to go away with someone else at 5 years old. It's up to you to make the call whether or not she is up for this. If she's had sleepovers and enjoyed them, that's a good sign. My youngest hated sleepovers and got anxiety in the middle of the night and so it would have been tricky. But we all want them to have nice experiences and since you say you can collect her, it's worth trying. You could even go up there and spend some time with them perhaps? And you can make plans so that she can call you? My children are older but I would have let them go and just dealt with any issues as they came.

Of course, that doesn't help with the present problem. What did your message say? I'd send a more urgent one saying really need to confirm details of the trip as it's so close, hope everything is ok as I can't get through to you. If still no response you'll have to go to her house, as she does have your money!

Not really nice to be name calling.
OP had been humble and regretful in her texts needing advice not abuse.
Must be nice to be a perfect parent!!

Contrary to all the posters advising to call, in this situation I would absolutely text.

I would be saying something like “Just wanted to check in about the trip next weekend, if you are having second thoughts about taking DD that’s totally fine, appreciate they are very young still! We are flexible so just let me know what you’d like to do or we can chat by phone”

This way you have given her an out if she wants one, she can think about it and call/text you knowing you’re flexible. Whereas if you call her she is put on the spot.

OP it sounds fine to me - she’s not some random woman! From what’ve you’ve said you do know her, meet fairly regularly, have had sleepovers. She sounds like a good friend and maybe she’s been exceptionally busy recently? You did talk about the trip quite recently?

Withhold your number

They are meant to go Monday

Hang on didn't you post about this before ages ago, when the mum was pressuring you to decide and pay up immediately because of the discount if she booked while she was still there? And loads of posters advised against it?

I absolutely do, and I know how it's very tempting to treat any ND child as older than they are. She's 5. You give her one - to -one special time in a different way. I stand by what I wrote and I'm not the only one shocked at someone who would seemingly happily agree for their very young child to go away, not for a night or a day trip, but for a week with a school mum who doesn't even respond to messages.

I don't need to calm down. You need to reassess what you were thinking. In theory a week with a close family member would be brilliant for her and yes, give her opportunities she might otherwise not get. But this isn't that.

This woman is effectively a stranger to you.

Don't get defensive because I'm telling you it's a poor parenting choice. It is and deep down I think you know that. Cancel it. At best your child will have a great time but will be completely uncontactable for the entire week as the Mum is flakey af. At worst, christ, doesn't bear thinking about.

Sadly some people do need telling.

If you know and trust her, then I'm sure the holiday will be fine. I wouldn't cancel it. However if she doesn't contact you by the week before, then I'd assume it's off.

What?!

@SunflowerMabel

I know it's been said already, but I agree that you should phone her. Why does no-one ever want to pick up the phone these days? Moreso millennials and Gen Z! My DC generation (born 1990s and later) will whatsapp and text people til they're blue in the face, but would rather cut off their own arm than pick up the phone and actually ring someone, and SPEAK to them.

I even occasionally see my DDs pass people in the street who are friends, or colleagues, and they just half smile and walk away as quickly as possible. Yet they are chatting non-stop over whatsapp! It's like they have forgotten how to speak to each other unless they are at work together, or socialising with others together. LOADS of young people (mostly 39 and under) who I know, do the same.

Also, whilst £300 may seem a bit much to pay for a 5-6 year old child, I think a lot of people are underestimating the price of holidays and trips within the UK. They can cost several thousand £££. The other parent will be looking after the OP's child for potentially a week, and feeding her and entertaining her. Even if the mini-break is say, 3-4 days, it could still cost a £700-900. Even much more ... Depending on what it is, and where it is of course.

I have to admit I was surprised when you said a reception child. My 5yo is happy to spend time with grandparents but even then I’m not 100% sure she won’t have a wobble. I think you have been a little ambitious going for that length of time with a family you don’t know so well.

I can’t imagine offering to take away someone else’s 5yo but if I was, I’d absolutely be confirming arrangements and getting everything sorted and clear well before going so your friend is being a bit off by not replying. You shouldn’t be writing off the £300 if it doesn’t happen for any reason. That is a lot.

*universe obviously (got to love autocorrect!)

Well said OP.

If you phone her she might panic and finally text back 😂