To dismiss a guy pursuing me, because he likes metal music?

I’m not really into that kind of music but I really love Down in a Hole by Alice in Chains.

@PyongyangKipperbang
"Did you see the school orchestra (think they may have been Australian....) playing Enter Sandman?! It was AMAZING!! The girl on the flute was totally rocking out! Its on Youtube if you havent."

I don't think so but will def look it up when I get home. Thanks for the recommendation. 🙂

OP It's probably a relief that you've made your decision. I'm sure, as you feel so passionately about music, that you'll meet someone with the same interests, and in the meantime I'm sure your music makes life more interesting anyway.

This thread has made me want to read "High Fidelity" again. I love the fact that there are now playlists for books like this that you can listen to at the same time.

I'm surprised you like grunge but not metal? Alice in Chains and Soundgarden had metal roots. Their music was arguably more metal than grunge. The two genres aren't that far apart.

Metal is a huuuuge musical genre with many sub genres.

Well you could have let a really good one go but at least you’ll never know.

I can't wear headphones as I get a headache.

There are headphones for a reason.

Absolutely. It depends how important music is to you both, I suppose.

I’ve had decades of sharing a house with dh and music is playing every day. If we didn’t have the broad middle ground of compatibility we’d probably be divorced by now, only slightly joking.

My oh only listened to metal when we first met, after 14 years together his tastes have diversified 😄

I’m imagining you had a very good reason to not like the name Dave. Otherwise that’s also odd.

My teenage son likes them. It does all sound like noise to me tbh but some of the singers of those sort of bands actually have nice voices when they sing ‘properly’.

As OP feels relieved she’s contacted him to say no then it is the right decision for her.

The majority of men i know and have met that are in to metal are wonderful people. As a woman in a metal crowd I am never worried about anything and feel very well looked after by the men in the crowd. So there's that!

Dh and I both into metal but I also like loads of other stuff. It makes no difference and we've found plenty of stuff we both like.

Also not all metal is equal, there's so many different styles I bet you'll find some you like. Just look at it as broadening both of your horizons. See what you like!

It's funny really because some of it might 'sound' demonic but really isn't.

Gojira, the French heavy metal band who played at the Olympic opening ceremony are serious environmentalists and sing about protecting whales and rainforests.

But if you don't look at the lyrics it's far from obvious.

That's why it was extra funny that they were being denounced as satanists by people who don't have a single clue.

Definitely!

Women and men were always safer in those places than anywhere else.

I miss the Oak, my local rock/metal/biker pub! So many of my friends met and got together there. Went back a couple of weeks ago with my daughter and its all middle aged and middle class. Classic case of middle aged men in red trousers and middle aged women in M&S!

I should add, I am middle aged and stood out a mile in my Five Finger Death Punch t shirt!!

Yes! When I lived abroad, I had a group of biker/metalhead friends, just the best bunch!

This thread has made me realise that I’ve never given it a thought about a prospective partner’s taste in music. I guess it might be because although I like music I wouldn’t say I was passionate about it.

Interesting. I’m extremely jealous of a mate who just went to 3 Rammstein concerts in 3 different countries, pretty much her summer holiday with her DH.

My Dh is hugely into metal, not too much ‘demonic screaming about hell’! I remember American Headcharge playing in the car and my dad dryly remarking how much he liked it.

My DH will tolerate pretty much any music-I like a mad variety-and I’ll just tune out anything too heavy, his choice in his car, my playlist in my car. If he were massively into dancing (the thought makes me laugh!) or going to concerts, I’d probably think we weren’t suited too. I think he got all of his concert going out of the way before I met him, thankfully!

Demonic? Seriously? Of course you are under no obligation to date a man regardless of his music taste. Your description is a bit weird though.

I've been around metal heads all my adult life. Some of the nicest most respectful bunch you'd ever meet. I'd leave him to someone who appreciates him regardless of his music taste

Lol me too, however my sister loves him and he treasures her as she deserves… but, nope, I will not be going to one of his pub gigs!

@PyongyangKipperbang you just had me lost in a moment of 90s nostalgia there. I miss those days so much, more as i get older. You always felt safe in the rock/metal places.

Did you add "However.....there are a LOT of women who want your number, can I share it on Mumsnet?!"

Did you honestly say 'I think your music is shit' 😆