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AIBU?

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Neighbours using our drive as their path

158 replies

Peedoff24 · 02/08/2024 19:19

We live in adjoining terraces, both with driveways. All other houses in our terrace have walls or hedges between them. We don’t but there is a decorative border type thing to delineate them. So it’s very obvious when you step off their property into ours.

They fit 2 cars onto their driveway but this is only possible because we don’t have a wall. They need to open their car door across our drive to be able to get in and out. This I don’t mind.

However, because it’s a squeeze to get between their cars they and their visitors, deliveries etc use our drive as a pathway to get to their front door. It’s got to the point that people literally step out of their door, step over the decorative stone thingy and then walk across our drive to the street.

We have a ring doorbell so get alerted every time somebody does this. It’s now got to the point that our drive is used as their pathway even when they only have one car parked and therefore plenty of space on their drive.

These are neighbours that don’t acknowledge my presence if we see each other since I complained when they had builders dumping rubbish on part of our garden.

WIBU and petty to go and buy some trellis and put it up to stop them from doing this? It would also mean they’d have to rethink their parking!

OP posts:
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WiddlinDiddlin · 03/08/2024 17:25

I'd do both sides and if you can afford it, any other general 'tarting up the front of the house' work so its far less obviously all about them and their irritating behaviour.

Even (if you have the acting skills necessary) knock on and warn them in advance...

'Just to let you know, we've finally saved enough to tidy up the front so we'll be doing some work outside for a few days, blah blah and installing the fence'...

So again... its NOT about them... you're NOT a mean neighbour, in fact you're LOVELY and polite and giving them advanced notice of work...

Etc etc. head tilt. irritating smile

HappiestSleeping · 03/08/2024 17:03

Peedoff24 · 03/08/2024 15:55

We could use planters but that would make our own space tight. Getting to the steps to our front door. A fence would be better. We’ve had a look today at what we could do to fence both sides so it doesn’t look like we are purposefully being difficult.

Once we put something up that’s going to make it very tricky for them to park two cars.

One might have been more sympathetic if they hadn't decided to use your drive as a footpath for general access. As it is, it's their own problem to solve, not yours.

JC03745 · 03/08/2024 16:52

Once we put something up that’s going to make it very tricky for them to park two cars.

That is THEIR problem and not yours. They could park 1 car on the street, park their cars one slightly further forward than the other or 1 facing forwards and 1 backwards etc. Again, its THEIR issue to sort out.

I'd suggest a subtle fence like these ! 😆

Neighbours using our drive as their path
Neighbours using our drive as their path
Whistleblowing · 03/08/2024 16:45

Okay seems that whatever is used is likely to be temporary then as I have seen fences broken by inconsiderate neighbours or maybe neighbours who choose to bash bins or doors against the fence that they don’t own. So I thought tall, wide haavy planters might be better.

Waaaaaahh · 03/08/2024 16:37

Whistleblowing · 03/08/2024 16:19

I didn’t say ordinary garden centre type planters. I described tall, wide, heavy ones a quick search brings up a wide variety probably costing the same as strong fences.

I don’t see why tall wide heavy planters are better than a fence on the grounds that a fence might get broken.

YellowDots · 03/08/2024 16:34

I didn’t say ordinary garden centre type planters. I described tall, wide, heavy ones a quick search brings up a wide variety probably costing the same as strong fences.

She's already said she doesn't want planters. Tall wide heavy planters sound awful.

BigAnne · 03/08/2024 16:32

@Peedoff24 Rose bushes.

RandomMess · 03/08/2024 16:27

Sounds like they would have to park their passenger doors next to each other to give the drivers more room to get out.

Not your problem to solve!

You could fence not all the way down to the drive toward the road so they could open their driver door over your drive still but if they then walked up your drive they couldn't get to their door.

OnePeachCrow · 03/08/2024 16:24

People wandering up my drive would really annoy me. I'd get a fence and also a ring doorbell in case it accidentally gets damaged. My son put a small barrier up to stop his neighbour parking across his and DS's property.

It took the neighbour three hits with his car to uproot the barrier and a few hundred pound to pay for repairs after being confronted with the the video evidence.

Itiswhysofew · 03/08/2024 16:19

Do what is necessary to keep them in their own space. Neighbours should keep off others land unless invited or want to speak to you.

Whistleblowing · 03/08/2024 16:19

Waaaaaahh · 03/08/2024 16:11

People are far more likely to shove their way through or step over planters than a fence. Confused

I didn’t say ordinary garden centre type planters. I described tall, wide, heavy ones a quick search brings up a wide variety probably costing the same as strong fences.

Waaaaaahh · 03/08/2024 16:11

Whistleblowing · 03/08/2024 16:08

Fencing can be broken and pushed over, I’d go for tall slender concrete planters with lots of heavy stones in the bottom to make it too heavy to push and too wide or tall to jump over. They do not sound like neighbours who would accept you and your visitors doing the same to them. It’s totally their problem, stop allowing it to be yours.

People are far more likely to shove their way through or step over planters than a fence. Confused

Whistleblowing · 03/08/2024 16:08

Fencing can be broken and pushed over, I’d go for tall slender concrete planters with lots of heavy stones in the bottom to make it too heavy to push and too wide or tall to jump over. They do not sound like neighbours who would accept you and your visitors doing the same to them. It’s totally their problem, stop allowing it to be yours.

WearyAuldWumman · 03/08/2024 16:04

MissMoneyFairy · 02/08/2024 19:22

Buy the trellis or plant a hedge, cheeky f.

From experience with a similar problem, new hedges get trampled and entrance forced through. Trellising plus a hedge might do the trick.

PotatoPie111 · 03/08/2024 16:02

That sounds ideal and doing both sides at the same time usually looks better anyway.

Peedoff24 · 03/08/2024 15:55

We could use planters but that would make our own space tight. Getting to the steps to our front door. A fence would be better. We’ve had a look today at what we could do to fence both sides so it doesn’t look like we are purposefully being difficult.

Once we put something up that’s going to make it very tricky for them to park two cars.

OP posts:
Goldcushions2 · 03/08/2024 15:22

I would be totally blocking their access asap, permanently.

needsomewarmsunshine · 03/08/2024 15:19

Our neighbour has a male relative who walks up our path, neighbour has a perfectly good one to use. It's a bit like a dog marking it's territory.
Waitting for the wanker to trip over....

Noshowlomo · 03/08/2024 15:17

Good question @Bargainacious !

Kriscross · 03/08/2024 15:08

Fence it, it's yours they are unreasonable

Bargainacious · 03/08/2024 15:07

justpeachy1234 · 03/08/2024 00:00

I have similar, but I'm the neighbour. We have 2 cars, they only have 1.

We do walk on our drive and park as far over as possible. I will walk in the tight gap between our cars with a buggy etc, but still open our doors slightly over our neighbours boundary.

I guess it's hard to control delivery drivers etc. I wouldn't ever encourage anyone to walk on their drive.

I worry that our neighbours will do what you're suggesting. It would make our lives difficult/ tighter. It wouldn't help neighbourly relations if/ when they do put in a fence.

I guess you have to think if it's worth the hassle? And do you care if your neighbours hate you?

So you readily acknowledge that you’re a nuisance neighbour making their lives more unpleasant and treating their property as if it’s partly yours, just because you have 2 cars?

What do you do in return to make life better for your neighbour?

Flossflower · 03/08/2024 14:40

In the long term a fence or a wall. In the short term very heavy planters.

PassingStranger · 03/08/2024 14:21

HeddaGarbled · 02/08/2024 20:27

Don’t start a stupid enmity with your neighbours over something that’s no skin of your nose. You’ll regret it.

So put up with vile people then, who think they can do what they want then? You just become a victim then?

Psychoticbreak · 03/08/2024 14:17

I am firmly in the 'go big or go home' camp. They already dont like you so the biggest thing you can put there the better imo.

HeddaGarbled · 03/08/2024 13:57

Ha, it did sound a bit like a threat, didn’t it? No, I’m just speaking after a long life and many years’ experience, to warn you that feuds with neighbours poison your life and jogging along with neighbours, whether in a friendly way or just a ‘leaving each other alone’ way, will make your life much much nicer.

Everyone seems so aggressive and quick to escalate minor tiffs into full blown wars. I think it’s a mistake.