Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Plane seat drama

387 replies

itstoohotnow · 02/08/2024 12:29

Just returned from a European break, booked 4 plane tickets for DH and 2 DS (19 &16) and I, eldest DS decided too old to go away with mum and dad so stayed at home. I contacted the airline as cheap non refundable ticket but said I can use it as a spare seat between DH and I so all good.

On return flight, only 2 hours long and we have seats A (me) B (spare) C (DH) and D (DS) then a couple with a baby in E & F

Couple with baby realised we were together and pretty much demanded DS moved to seat B - I politely pointed out it wasn't a random spare seat but a booked and paid for one, now I have 2 kids so appreciate it's hard to travel with a little one and would have offered the seat but they were so bloody rude and entitled. I pointed out we had paid for 4 seats and they had only paid for 2 - so asked for a contribution towards cost £30 (by this point they are just demanding the seat because they have a child)

They got pretty rude and offensive (called me a fat b**ch) so I said no, stewardess said was up to me

Should I have given them the seat?

OP posts:
TonTonMacoute · 02/08/2024 14:07

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 02/08/2024 13:39

Well no YANBU at all.

Only problem is that DS ended up stuck beside a rude couple with a baby rather than sat with his Mum and Dad!

IME 16 year old sons would far prefer this option.

BMW6 · 02/08/2024 14:05

You had paid for the seat, if they want it they should reimburse you for it.

Otherwise No, they can fuck off.

Polarnight · 02/08/2024 14:04

No. Under any circumstances. You paid for the seat and that's it.

PrincessHoneysuckle · 02/08/2024 14:03

So if I've paid for my family to sit together I might lose that seat for someone who couldn't he arsed to pay?

JC89 · 02/08/2024 14:02

No, it wouldn't have been unreasonable for them to ask (once, politely) but once you said no that should have been the end of it. I wonder if they assumed you had only paid for 3 seats and chosen to leave a gap in the hope that you would get a free middle seat?

Peony15 · 02/08/2024 14:02

Former airline staff here.
If you book a ticket and no show / don't check
in within the airline's deadline you are not entitled to your " seat " as you are no longer flying.
The seat gets released when the flight closes between 60-40 mins before departure generally.
Every airline also overbooks flights to cover for no shows / people missing flights due to traffic, illness, late connecting flights.
Nor do you get guaranteed a specific seat even if you paid for it in case of equipment change/ defect seats / accomodating people who
by law have to sit together or close by ( kids under 12 have to be within reach of parents in adjacent seats/behind/across aisle ) to put on oxgygen masks in emergency.
When DS no
showed you lost the seat and the airline could have reallocated it after check in deadline. You ticket was non refundable, maybe travel insurance covers it depending on circumstance. You were not entitled to the empty seat, any passenger could have been allocated it but sometimes if flights are empty no show seats stay unfilled.
I can see why you think you " owned "
DS seat but you didn't.
Just info, not commenting on scenario of the other passenger.

NasiDagang · 02/08/2024 13:59

CalmaLlamaDown · 02/08/2024 13:11

Going against the grain here, but I would have offered the spare seat once I saw they had a baby. It’s only a two hour flight, so personally the extra space wouldn’t have made that much difference to me.

But your seat, your decision.

We are supposed to give up seats to rude people? If someone calls me a fat bitch, I wouldn't budge.

theemmadilemma · 02/08/2024 13:56

Well done OP.

The entitlement of some people is just astounding.

anon4net · 02/08/2024 13:56

While I wouldn't have asked for money, I don't in the slightest think their attitude warranted your giving it to them at all! Sorry they treated you this way. What a horrible experience as you then had to sit with them/next to them the whole way!

Original poster
itstoohotnow · 02/08/2024 13:51

Ahh thank you everyone, I feel better now Smile

OP posts:
PassingStranger · 02/08/2024 13:49

Marchitectmummy · 02/08/2024 12:31

Nope, classic case of where being rude gets people...no where.

Yes, so many people don't know how to handle things.

Grammarnut · 02/08/2024 13:48

No. If they wanted a third seat they ought to have bought one. Many years ago I travelled with ex-H and 2 DCs. On the way back there was a patient with a drip on board. We had centre aisle seats, so had a rest of some sort in between the centre seats. My DD fell asleep over this. Stewardess told me DD should not be using two seats as the plane was full. I had to loudly point out that she was not, but leaning onto the cup rest between 2 seats, both of which we had bought - DS was on the other side. I got the feeling she thought I should have my five year old on my lap so someone else could have her seat. Having booked a seat for DD this really annoyed me. I am with you. Entitled couple, let them get on with it.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 02/08/2024 13:48

Being awkward and refusing to sit in their allotted seats should mean they get thrown off the plane
If more airlines did this then people would stop kicking off

It could also cause even more hellish delays while their luggage was offloaded with them - though knowing the owners had been on the flight originally the regs would allow the aircraft to depart if they wish

So maybe that's not a bad idea after all ... not only the flight missed and the start of a possible break spoiled but all the hassle of getting bags back too

TartanJambo · 02/08/2024 13:47

Yanbu because they were rude. I wouldn't have either.

Had they asked politely, I would've given it.

OlderGlaswegianLivingInDevon · 02/08/2024 13:47

NO

they don't know why your spare seat was empty, they didn't know he chose not to come

Nothing stopped them from buying 3 seats, they chose not to. Their choice.

BibbleandSqwauk · 02/08/2024 13:45

Years ago travelling with DS who was just under 2 and DD a newborn. We booked DS a seat even though we didn't "need" to because we knew we'd need the wriggle room. Someone tried to argue it was up for grabs and we had to be quite firm and clear in the reasons why we'd booked it. Afterwards I thought we should have just let them sit there and then have DS clamber all over them after take off!

GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 02/08/2024 13:45

itstoohotnow · 02/08/2024 13:41

He was across the aisle from my DH and he used to 16 and not bothered by it at all

Show quote history

If he prefers aisle (and let’s face it, who likes middle?) I can see why he might have been happier with this.

I guess that’s the thing - their “way”’would have ended with one of your party squished in the middle (presumably your DS) having paid for four seats, whilst they got to spread out. And take the prime aisle seat.

Original poster
itstoohotnow · 02/08/2024 13:44

AnnieMcFanny · 02/08/2024 13:09

I wasn’t aware you could claim the seat if one of the passengers decided not to fly. It would surely be a ‘no show’ and the seat would then go back into the system to be allocated to another passenger.

Edited

Yes you can and it's quite common if the price is low for people to book the extra middle seat for added comfort - you just have to let the airline know at check in

OP posts:
GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 02/08/2024 13:43

itstoohotnow · 02/08/2024 13:39

In fairness it's quite accurate Smile

Show quote history

Even if you’re fat (like me) they shouldn’t be using it as an insult and I’m sure you’re not a bitch!

Did your husband get insulted on the basis of being a man or was this pure misogyny?

Badburyrings · 02/08/2024 13:43

If they had been nice and polite I probably would have given them the seat but with that attitude, it would have been a hard no. If they wanted 3 seats they should have purchased 3 seats.

Youcantcallacatspider · 02/08/2024 13:43

Not only would I have not given them the seat I would have expected the stewards to warn them for being so abusive. The stewardess should have told them to leave you alone or they're off the flight. You shouldn't have to tolerate verbal abuse at any time never mind during a paid for service

notimagain · 02/08/2024 13:42

Bunnycat101 · 02/08/2024 13:34

Given you paid for it, I don’t see why you should have given it up but I also don’t know if you can guarantee a no show seat.

i was on holiday last summer and the lady in front of me was in a 3 with her child but her husband didn’t travel. Another family of 3 was refusing to sit in their seats which were apart (hadn’t paid to be together) and it was all kicking off as air steward was trying to juggle people around and wanted to move the 2 in the row elsewhere so the other family could sit as a 3. First women said she’d paid for it and it was hers. Steward saying her husband was a no-show so it was for the airline to reallocate. We were an hour late taking off as we missed our slot and lots of angry pissed off people.

It’s a complex one…

I’ll stand by my comment upthread that mostly no-shows aren’t visible until doors closed, so usually seat trading can’t be done until that point….TBH given the argument it might have been in the OPs interests to claim the DS was delayed en-route or in the terminal and was hoping to make the flight……

..and it may not be relevant here but there’s also the side issue menti9end previously that it is perfectly legit at many airlines to book an extra seat for comfort or other reasons….so you can’t assume an empty seat is up for grabs.

Original poster
itstoohotnow · 02/08/2024 13:41

No33 · 02/08/2024 12:54

I think its weird you were making your son sit next to other passengers and kept a free between you and your husband tbh

He was across the aisle from my DH and he used to 16 and not bothered by it at all

OP posts:
GertrudePerkinsPaperyThing · 02/08/2024 13:39

Well no YANBU at all.

Only problem is that DS ended up stuck beside a rude couple with a baby rather than sat with his Mum and Dad!

butterbeansauce · 02/08/2024 13:39

Bunnycat101 · 02/08/2024 13:34

Given you paid for it, I don’t see why you should have given it up but I also don’t know if you can guarantee a no show seat.

i was on holiday last summer and the lady in front of me was in a 3 with her child but her husband didn’t travel. Another family of 3 was refusing to sit in their seats which were apart (hadn’t paid to be together) and it was all kicking off as air steward was trying to juggle people around and wanted to move the 2 in the row elsewhere so the other family could sit as a 3. First women said she’d paid for it and it was hers. Steward saying her husband was a no-show so it was for the airline to reallocate. We were an hour late taking off as we missed our slot and lots of angry pissed off people.

Irrespective of whether the no-show seat was theirs, the other two seats were theirs and they shouldn't have to move their seats to accommodate entitled, angry people who are trying to get something for nothing. Being awkward and refusing to sit in their allotted seats should mean they get thrown off the plane.

If more airlines did this then people would stop kicking off.