To hate family holidays?

The blaring TV would do my nut in.
Can you hire bikes/e-bikes?
Any fishing in the area? Boat hire?

It sounds shit OP and you in laws are being really antisocial not wanting nice dinners and just sitting there with the TV on all evening. They may as well be at home.

Your first mistake is you are with your in laws. Hell would freeze over before we spent our precious family summer holiday with in laws or even my parents tbh who we both get on very well with.

LOVE family holidays with just our two kids amazing quality time as a family. Lovely to find that away from work / school their social lives we actually all get on really well.

I don't necessarily agree that accommodation has to be nicer than your home. Not everyone can afford that and might still want to travel. However, if you're going to choose less luxurious accommodation it does need to be in a place where there are lots of things you want to see and do.

I think the car thing is a bit of a non-issue. A mile isn't that far. One of you walks to bring it closer then you can all go out. Lack of google maps for one mile is not a reason not to go out. Drive for a bit until you have signal or find a signpost.

Next time Id suggest a weekend break in a nice hotel with the in-laws rather than a whole week in a poor airbnb. Then you have a separate holiday by yourselves.

If it's only a week and it isn't every single year then just suck it up. You say they are wonderful grandparents and presumably not unpleasant people and it pleases your DH to offer them kindness. I also think it does children good to realise that sometimes their elders (especially those that love them) should be accommodated, even if it means their own holiday isn't quite so enjoyable.

What I would question though is the choice of AirB&B. Why pick something so remote and awkward! Surely something in a more lively village/town would have been better given the mix of ages and interests involved.

But surely you go on days out eg, zoo, beach, theme park, national trust property, water park, children's farm, bowling, caving, etc etc. I have never been on a UK holiday what consisted of walks and squash.

I do holidays with DH and DS only. DS and DH and I all like the same kind of holidays so it works. I've tried group family holidays and there's always one who expects you to do what they want all the time or they are impossible to compromise with. At a push, I might do a girlie weekend but that's the most I'd do.

And I refuse to do self catering. I do all the cooking at home so if everyone else is away from their daily grind, I want for me too!

omg this is exactly how I feel. I love my house so I only rent places that are as nice or nicer - otherwise what is the point. We booked 2 trips away this year and each time I spent a bit extra to find a nice house right on the water.

Op, where you are sounds awful tbh. Can't you, dh and your kids go out some evening the 4 of you for dinner or find an activity your inlaws can't/won't do (ziplining or whatever) and do that for a few hours.

I would hate to holiday with my in laws (or my own family - or indeed any family!) and I love them.

Echoing other posters, your problem is that you’re going away with your in-laws! I’d much rather have no holiday at all than go with my in-laws.
And yes to only booking a holiday home that’s nicer than your actual home. We’re currently in a place that has loads of space, beautiful views and a games room with a pool table for our teenage DCs to play on. It was really expensive, but it feels like a holiday! Why spend money on something that makes you stressed and miserable?

YANBU but if my family holiday included my ILs I wouldn't go.

This year, ds and I went to Portugal.
He'd just finished his gcses so wanted to sleep, swim & be left alone.

I'd just finished a gruelling year so we were in an hotel that did magnificent breakfasts. Then I'd lie by the pool, swim, read, snooze, have a siesta. Maybe amble down to the local marina with ds for an ice cream.

Out in the evening for a meal, people watch and then back for a sundowner at the hotel while ds played computer games.

I didn't have to cook, clean, shop, hurry, drive, think about what to eat, all week. It was bliss 😎

The problem is your particular family holiday. It sounds incredibly dull and there is nothing about that which I'd enjoy. Why are you doing everything together?

I admit holidays with elderly parents are never as good as when it's just me and DH. However (!) we make them work by going somewhere we actually want to see and I always absolutely insist we do our own thing at least 50% of the time. At first, my parents were a bit put out but they got used to it quickly i.e. one day we went kayaking, they do their little walk, and we see each other at dinner. Win win.

Weird phrasing, a city break can be a family holiday? Are you only talking about European summer holiday destinations? Or stays a week long?

Either way I disagree, with 2 young kids I much prefer stays of 2 weeks. It makes it feel more worth it, the first few days end up being travel, adjusting to routine etc.
But also I don’t stay anywhere that’s less nice or less clean than my home. The point of a holiday to me is to stay somewhere nicer, not are we having squashed sandwiches for lunch.

If you are not, you could be 😂

Who chose the airbnb and location? What do you mean by your in laws don't do food?

We're going away with my in laws next week, staying in a beautiful airbnb with lots going on nearby. I can't wait! Sorry yours is shit😕

It sounds like you and the DC are trying to support your husband in being kind to his elderly parents and doing something nice for them. Try to feel pleased with yourself about that (and suck it up a bit, doesn't sound like you have much choice) but avoid a repeat in future!

I'm on the fence because I love holidays but perhaps not with wider family!

Eek! I would never holiday all together! That’s too regimented! Holidays are great to facilitate the relationships between grandparents and dc - and they are mainly about the dc tbh - but you need to book a place nearby but separate so that you can do your own thing, eat what you want and watch what you want on some nights. Have the odd day where you do your own thing and explore the area. And then join up for lunches or whatever. And you can invite your in laws over for meals sometimes. It’s far too claustrophobic otherwise!

It depends who is paying for the property too of course as to who gets to choose etc so that has to be taken in to account.

Otherwise though, coffee and pasta with constant tv soaps sounds pretty deadly to me so I’m with you op. It’s nice that your in laws are having a lovely time this year, but I think you can explain to your dh that your needs are too different when arranging a holiday next time.

YANBU at all. We're just back (three kids, no in laws thank fuck) from a week on the coast. Some things were fine: proximity to beach, Ocado order to the house with lots of treats and easy food to see us through.

But - the house was definitely worse than my own, with no freezer (goodbye ice creams), microwave or Wifi. I think it was a deceased estate in the middle of being sold. The kitchen was in the basement and was dark and a bit miserable. The seagulls did their thing like clockwork, waking up my kids who then found they couldn't watch TV because the signal was too patchy. £125/night. Oh, and obviously I'm still paying for the nursery they aren't attending, to facilitate all this.

I would so much rather have stayed at home.

It does sound grim for you. I think you probably need to suck it up this time but going forward, if you holiday together, make sure you can do your eating out, games and wine etc whilst the in-laws watch tv if necessary. I bet the in laws are loving having you altogether but the children must be bored too if nothing is happening other than tv once home.

I love my family holidays, me and my dc, 12 & 10, DSis and DN 10. The kids are old enough to pretty much do as they please around the resort, DSis and I can completely relax without worry. I read a book a day, enjoy the hot weather abroad and completely recuperate from the busyness of work.

Being on a sunlounger all day is obviously not everyone's idea of a good time so you need to take a holiday that you do enjoy - constant walks and picnics, and especially self catering would be my idea of hell!

We love our family holidays but we always do them with just DH and the dcs, never with PILs or any other family. We have only short periods of time we can spend together as a family so we're not willing to compromise on what we do, which we'd have to if we went away with others.

I think you could argue that any self-catering in the UK is using a house that could be for a local person all year-round, so you will not do such holidays again, with or without older parents/in-laws.

@Straitjacketsandroses I think where you are going wrong is going on holidays with the inlaws and then doing everything together. We used to go on holiday with in-laws but we got on very well with them. It was always a hotel abroad but we did our own thing. They liked to chill out in the beach our children wanted to do something else. We would meet up for drinks or at other intervals during the day but we did not move together as a large group. That is suffocating and too much of a wide age gaps in the group to fulfill everyone needs. Your in-laws should be doing their pointless walking together while you do your own thing and maybe just meet up for dinner later.