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Original poster

to think he should not have called me a c*nt!

138 replies

stressedout1994 · 01/08/2024 07:36

Morning all,

Last night I was cycling home from a friend's house. I forgot my lights, so cycled when it was still relatively light, but by the time I was within about 10 minutes of my flat it was quite dark and the roads were busy. I wouldn't normally do this but the roads near my flat are really busy and people drive really fast, so I started cycling on the pavement as they are relatively wide and no one was around.

There was a man on the pavement outside a shop. There was plenty of room to manoeuvre on either side of him, and I slowed down and moved my handlebars to move to the left. So he moved to the left. So I moved my handlebars to move to the right, and he moved to the right. I stopped, planning to get off my bike and wheel it past him.

He shouted 'just fuck off, fuck off!' I was shocked, and involuntarily scowled. He then shouted 'yes that's right just fuck off, don't fucking scowl at me you cunt!'

I just stood still looking at him and then he went into the shop. I then cycled past.

I know I was in the wrong for cycling on the pavement (even if very slowly and only when no-one around) but I think his reaction was completely out of order.

Side note: I have lived in London for 10 years, since uni, and I feel like in the last couple of years there have been more and more people behaving erratically or threateningly. On the rest of my ride home I saw no fewer than 4 men who were clearly unwell shouting in the street, at themselves and others. I don't understand why nothing is done about this. I know lots of people say 'oooh, that's just LONDON, I don't bat an EYELID!', but I actually think that women should feel safe when walking round the capital city!

YABU - you shouldn't have been on the pavement, get some lights you silly moo

YANBU - you should never call a woman a cunt

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Persianpaws · 28/05/2025 06:06

I think the OP has forgotten about it now since it was last year.

Hopefully she’s remembered her lights for future journeys!

Callie247 · 28/05/2025 05:46

stressedout1994 · 01/08/2024 08:09

I know that in this situation we were BOTH being unreasonable but my point is that he was being MORE unreasonable! I could tell from this man's demeanour he was just spoiling for a fight or some form of confrontation... had I wheeled my bike or even walked past he would have made some kind of comment.

@LoneHydrangea 'cunt' isn't just 'an insult, bandied about by many' it's the worst swear word because of misogyny. No one thinks 'cock' is as offensive.
A big man shouting that a woman is a 'cunt' in public is completely different to, say, me calling one of my male friends a 'tosser' in jest. He would not have called me a cunt if I was a man. He probably wouldn't have said anything if I was a man. He wanted to have a go at someone smaller than him, and I gave him that opportunity by riding on the pavement.

You clearly think his unreasonable trumps yours but ignore the fact that your unreasonable CAUSED his. If you hadn’t been on the pavement and a pedestrian who had the right of way hadn’t had to faff about changing direction repeatedly to get round you because you caused the problem, nobody would have called anyone anything. Yes it’s mysoginist, yes it’s a bad word but this is more about cause and effect, ie had you not been on the pavement there would have been no words said.

Elektra1 · 28/05/2025 05:12

Don’t cycle on the pavement. If it’s not safe to cycle on the road because you don’t have lights, get off and walk. You wouldn’t drive a car without lights, or decide to drive it on the pavement because your headlights weren’t working

Walkden · 28/05/2025 04:32

Guess he's not a fan of matriarchy chicken!

XWKD · 28/05/2025 04:05

You were in the wrong, but he was being a cunt.

Diblin93 · 28/05/2025 03:36

You’re coming across as very entitled. You were absolutely in the wrong and could’ve hurt somebody. He shouldn’t have sworn at you like that but you have no respect for the safety of pedestrians - you could’ve knocked someone over, maybe an elderly person. I have no sympathy for you whatsoever and think you should stop bleating.

Weefox · 10/01/2025 14:04

Cycling on the pavement is both seriously selfish and dangerous.

A friend's dog died (awful accident really upsetting, as a result of a collision with pavement cyclist. Children and the old are particularly vulnerable.

Rummly · 02/08/2024 12:56

He’s a wanker.

But props to him for using the word ‘scowl’. We don’t get enough of that good use of language these days.

Original poster
stressedout1994 · 02/08/2024 12:47

@SprinkleOfSunak just going through the responses and just seen yours. I am really sorry to hear that, that's awful. Did your husband get the number plate so he could report it to the police? Even if he didn't he should report to the police with the time and location so they can check the CCTV. The police can be quite useless but as it is a hate crime they should take it more seriously and deal with it.

OP posts:
Seas164 · 02/08/2024 10:25

stressedout1994 · 01/08/2024 09:14

I know, I think it's because we are all smug, annoying, and look good in lycra !

Show quote history

Smug until you get called a cunt by a pedestrian for cycling on the pavement. Then unrepentant, for some reason.

Mercurial123 · 02/08/2024 10:07

bottomsup12 · 01/08/2024 22:42

Women aren't safe in UK anymore

I know bloody cyclists.

Timinfuckingruislip · 02/08/2024 07:21

bottomsup12 · 01/08/2024 22:42

Women aren't safe in UK anymore

I know right? They can have a dickhead on a bike coming toward them on a pavement at any time.

Goldenbear · 01/08/2024 23:25

ShanequaAndWhat · 01/08/2024 22:46

@Goldenbear on the app so can't quote.

Do you mean using the word is more a Northern/Midland thing as People Just Do Nothing is about Urban life, the pirate radio scene in the West London, it isn’t set in
the North?
Sorry if I wasn't clear. Yes, the word is more northern or midland than southern and from what you're saying you're a laaandaner and that programme is set in the south. That fits that you use it less.

but the man is absolutely using it in a derogatory way and sounds like he was pointlessly looking for a fight as so many men are these days!
Well, yes 100% but he could have used cock, prick, dick or bellend. Him acting how he did makes him offensive. Not which particular swear word he used. Yes, cunt has more ooomph than any based on male genitalia but I don't succumb to that being a bad thing. It's because frankly, female genitalia also has more ooomph.

That makes sense now you have described it, I think it is just the way it was used in this instance that was aggressive and OTT.

ShanequaAndWhat · 01/08/2024 22:49

@saltinesandcoffeecups he did also commit an illegal act. One has been quoted earlier in the thread but you don't have to touch someone for assault to take place. Fear or threat of attack is enough and I would say he did that. Whether you like the word or not, you can't just go around screaming that people are cunts.

ShanequaAndWhat · 01/08/2024 22:46

@Goldenbear on the app so can't quote.

Do you mean using the word is more a Northern/Midland thing as People Just Do Nothing is about Urban life, the pirate radio scene in the West London, it isn’t set in
the North?
Sorry if I wasn't clear. Yes, the word is more northern or midland than southern and from what you're saying you're a laaandaner and that programme is set in the south. That fits that you use it less.

but the man is absolutely using it in a derogatory way and sounds like he was pointlessly looking for a fight as so many men are these days!
Well, yes 100% but he could have used cock, prick, dick or bellend. Him acting how he did makes him offensive. Not which particular swear word he used. Yes, cunt has more ooomph than any based on male genitalia but I don't succumb to that being a bad thing. It's because frankly, female genitalia also has more ooomph.

bottomsup12 · 01/08/2024 22:42

Women aren't safe in UK anymore

saltinesandcoffeecups · 01/08/2024 22:38

lol @Goldenbear maybe the OP can take this win and forget about the guy on the street!

Silver linings and all that!

Goldenbear · 01/08/2024 22:35

saltinesandcoffeecups · 01/08/2024 22:29

Mea culpa… I did misinterpret. I still don’t agree but I’ll retract my hostility statement 🙂

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Well I learnt what ‘mea culpa’ means tonight so to be fair that has extended my vocabulary! 😊

wutheringkites · 01/08/2024 22:30

I hate adults cycling on pavements, I don't care about your risk assessment.

He shouldn't have called you a cunt though.

saltinesandcoffeecups · 01/08/2024 22:29

Goldenbear · 01/08/2024 22:26

Hardly, you have totally misinterpreted my point, maybe because it is online. I am not suggesting you grow up, I am suggesting the man in the OP does as he can’t cope with someone on a bike that sounds incredibly apologetic about it and realised her ‘illegal’ action quite quickly. Mountain out of a molehill comes to mind!

Show quote history

Mea culpa… I did misinterpret. I still don’t agree but I’ll retract my hostility statement 🙂

Goldenbear · 01/08/2024 22:26

saltinesandcoffeecups · 01/08/2024 22:16

Well one of these was illegal and one wasn’t…soooo🤷‍♀️

But speaking of hostility,, you seem to have it is spades 🤣

Show quote history

Hardly, you have totally misinterpreted my point, maybe because it is online. I am not suggesting you grow up, I am suggesting the man in the OP does as he can’t cope with someone on a bike that sounds incredibly apologetic about it and realised her ‘illegal’ action quite quickly. Mountain out of a molehill comes to mind!

MrsTerryPratchett · 01/08/2024 22:24

pictoosh · 01/08/2024 09:18

Must say as a cyclist, I do come across some twat cyclists...most seem courteous enough but yeah, you do get them.
Encountered a few pricks on the Union Canal in Edinburgh yesterday. I use a trail bike (prefer off-roading) and was effectively mown into by important men hunched over the bars of their ultra-skinny road bikes, a couple of times.
It's a busy-as-fuck multi-user path in the city...dogs, kids, skateboards, the elderly, wheelchairs ALL and EVERYONE uses it.
Like fuck is it YOUR path. Dicks.

That feels better.

I met both ends recently. I was running on a mixed use path, on my bloody side. A cyclist came towards me. He veered off into the verge and stopped, because he saw the other twatbadger going far too fast, far too close, about to pass me from behind with no warning. The nice cyclist had seen this and gave as much room as possible to let twatbadger avoid me. Uphill as well so poor nice cyclist had to restart uphill.

So if you know a brown-haired cyclist with a ponytail who makes way for very slow middle-aged runners, please say thanks.

If you know an utter dickhead with a NZ fern backpack, tell them to fuck off from me.

OP just get off and push on pavements. Men shouldn't call women cunts but equally you were acting like a bit of a twat.

Goldenbear · 01/08/2024 22:23

ShanequaAndWhat · 01/08/2024 22:10

@Goldenbear I've just googled people just do nothing as not heard of it. I would say it's more of a midland/northern thing.We are also in agreement that it's used more now than previous, I don't think that's anything to do with women hating being mainstream. If anything it used to be much more mainstream. When I was a child it wasn't widely used but this has changed now for some time.

It's not about hating women. I'm a staunch feminist and do not see how or why people are so obsessed with nullifying or putting down a woman's private parts. They are strong and powerful, just like the word sounds due to its short, sharp nature. You can give it whatever narrative you like but that narrative is lesser and the years go on.

Do you mean using the word is more a Northern/Midland thing as People Just Do Nothing is about Urban life, the pirate radio scene in the West London, it isn’t set in
the North?

but the man is absolutely using it in a derogatory way and sounds like he was pointlessly looking for a fight as so many men are these days!

TeachesOfPeaches · 01/08/2024 22:23

I think the normal response in London would be shouting fuck off yourself as you cycled past and never think of the incident again

saltinesandcoffeecups · 01/08/2024 22:16

Goldenbear · 01/08/2024 22:07

The act of riding a bike on a pavement, oh my God so fucking shocking, when people are shocked about stuff like this and think the hostility is justified, it makes me always think they must have had a very sheltered life and live in some kind of Chocolate Box Village! An inoffensive women cautiously riding a bike, then getting off to accommodate this outraged man is so, so scary that this man can’t contain his outrage - grow up!

Show quote history

Well one of these was illegal and one wasn’t…soooo🤷‍♀️

But speaking of hostility,, you seem to have it is spades 🤣