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AIBU?

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Original poster

Controlling for being angry at DH using oven

832 replies

SharpOliveHam · 30/07/2024 13:32

Dh likes to eat healthily which means he never fries any food. Even the 1 cal spray is not acceptable. Fine.

But DH knows I’m very funny about the heat. Hate it and do very well to keep a cool house. I’m the person who goes around closing curtains, opening windows at the optimal time to keep things cool.

Just got off a work call to a sauna downstairs. DH has made himself a fry up (chicken sausages, egg, mushrooms, tomatoes). The kitchen is reading 26c - it was 22.5c when I looked at around 12 pm.

I told dh that this was really selfish behaviour. And now I’ve been called controlling.

AIBU?

OP posts:
HollyKnight · 30/07/2024 19:42

As the saying goes, if you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen!

It's one room. Go somewhere else and take the dogs with you. Make sure they are well groomed. Strip the undercoat.

woofyoof · 30/07/2024 19:36

Get an air con unit and stay in that room with the dogs.

Make dh run after them cooling them down.

I get you're annoyed because you're the only one putting effort in and it's making you crazy.

You might need to live in a separate house tbh

MissConductUS · 30/07/2024 19:35

somanynamesbynow · 30/07/2024 19:14

A/C units eat energy!!!

So does heating the house in the winter. Is that also not allowed?

Ididntsignuptothis · 30/07/2024 19:35

I get your frustration OP, I think most forget that the little things our partners do can piss us off no end, especially when we're already uncomfortable.

I think you both sound a bit highly strung.. you about the heat and dogs, and he about his eating (not even 1 cal spray oil?)

letmego24 · 30/07/2024 19:33

Didshejustsaythatoutloud · 30/07/2024 19:17

Did you not say dh never has fried food????

Yes! Which is it or is the fry up a one off?

NewGreenDuck · 30/07/2024 19:31

Is he allowed to make hot drinks?

DiduAye · 30/07/2024 19:31

Not liking the Mumsnet response are you ?

Mynaddmawr · 30/07/2024 19:31

I appreciate a hot house is annoying but Christ let the man use his own oven in peace

threelions · 30/07/2024 19:31

Gosh I rarely say this but Yes. You are being unreasonable

letmego24 · 30/07/2024 19:30

SharpOliveHam · 30/07/2024 13:35

Im doing everything in my power to keep the house cool. Not only for me but for dogs and he has just undone everything

It's his house too!

LoneHydrangea · 30/07/2024 19:29

I have to thank the OP as I read her posts out to my family earlier as we sat outside, and it caused much mirth.

CheeseandOnionCrispFan · 30/07/2024 19:28

You sound even more barking than the dogs! Your dh is a grown man who is quite entitled to us the cooker!

Lotsofsnacks · 30/07/2024 19:27

Your poor husband, so he can’t have a hot meal if he fancies one?!

ByKindOpalPoet · 30/07/2024 19:27

Oldermum84 · 30/07/2024 19:21

Yes absolutely. If you are married to someone you will surely know things about them like the fact they don't like the heat. It is disrespectful of the other to ignore that and warm the house by cooking when you could have had something cold. It's the same either way around.

Show quote history

it’s also disrespectful to control how someone uses their own house. Why should you be forced to have something cold? Why does OP trump DH

sandyhappypeople · 30/07/2024 19:26

somanynamesbynow · 30/07/2024 19:14

A/C units eat energy!!!

It doesn't actually, but even if it did.. so bloody what?? So does the double wide range? it's all about prioritising what you need in life, and how comfortable you want to be.

Besides that you literally need to use it around 10 days a year, if that.

It costs us about 35p per hour to run ours.

Hennypen321 · 30/07/2024 19:25

SharpOliveHam · 30/07/2024 13:50

My poor dogs have thick, long coats that cannot be shaved. Double coated.

Give them a cool shower and leave damp

Commonsense22 · 30/07/2024 19:25

This has to be the most U thread I've ever seen on AIBU

betterangels · 30/07/2024 19:25

BoredAuditor · 30/07/2024 19:05

I have a feeling this is more of a DH "general problem" rather than a specific "DH put the oven on in this heat problem".

Do you not get on generally? In which case you'll always find him irritating.

I wouldn't get on with someone this controlling and dramatic-sounding tbf. At least not in the same house.

Cheesyfootballs01 · 30/07/2024 19:25

OP - AIBU?
Mumsnet - Yes!!
OP - no I’m not!!

Bluebirdover · 30/07/2024 19:24

@Oldermum84 isn't it disrespectful to your partner to dictate what food you allow them to cook?

Because you're "hot", everyone apart from you and OP disagrees? But you think k you're right?

You're as batshit crazy and controlling as OP, how the hell did you happen to be on the same forum?

tennesseewhiskey1 · 30/07/2024 19:24

Ffs you sound insane. You are controlling. You’re bringing the paddling pools out for the dogs?! Your poor husband - Imagine living like that!!

Oldermum84 · 30/07/2024 19:23

Bluebirdover · 30/07/2024 18:28

Cooking a lion h is disrespectful... just what the fuck am I reading??

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Cooking a lion is not only disrespectful but illegal! Don't do this! 🤣

EveryOtherNameTaken · 30/07/2024 19:22

PerfectTravelTote · 30/07/2024 18:56

1 Cal spray is not healthy .

"Frylight is made up of oil, water, lecithins (emulsifier), xanthan gum (thickener), natural flavouring"

On this and on every other point, reason is on your husbands side.

Haha! I thought this. UPF.

Oldermum84 · 30/07/2024 19:21

ByKindOpalPoet · 30/07/2024 18:36

Would you say OP was being disrespectful and unthoughtful if it was the other way round or would you be calling the DH controlling?

Show quote history

Yes absolutely. If you are married to someone you will surely know things about them like the fact they don't like the heat. It is disrespectful of the other to ignore that and warm the house by cooking when you could have had something cold. It's the same either way around.

betterangels · 30/07/2024 19:19

You are. Wtf let the man use the oven.