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AIBU?

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Original poster

Controlling for being angry at DH using oven

832 replies

SharpOliveHam · 30/07/2024 13:32

Dh likes to eat healthily which means he never fries any food. Even the 1 cal spray is not acceptable. Fine.

But DH knows I’m very funny about the heat. Hate it and do very well to keep a cool house. I’m the person who goes around closing curtains, opening windows at the optimal time to keep things cool.

Just got off a work call to a sauna downstairs. DH has made himself a fry up (chicken sausages, egg, mushrooms, tomatoes). The kitchen is reading 26c - it was 22.5c when I looked at around 12 pm.

I told dh that this was really selfish behaviour. And now I’ve been called controlling.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Stumpedasatree · 30/07/2024 14:06

I have a double coated dog and no cooling mat and no cold icy towels have been thrown over her today. I have also used the oven to bake some cake. I must be crazy and an irresponsible dog owner.

ShouldhavebeencalledAppollo · 30/07/2024 14:06

SharpOliveHam · 30/07/2024 14:02

The kitchen is now 26c according to hive. I checked at around 12 pm and it was nowhere near that.

I just went and touched range and it is scolding to the touch still. The kitchen was lovely and cool for the dogs and now it is the hottest room in the house.

Show quote history

It was 22.5. You said yourself. Not sure I would say 22.5 is nowhere near 26.
It will be back down to 22.5 very soon.

have you tried putting a frozen towel on the cooker to close it down?

paradisecityx · 30/07/2024 14:06

Very controlling behaviour.
Obsessional.

purplecorkheart · 30/07/2024 14:06

I would look into getting rid of the range then if it going to cause such hassle and replace with a normal oven which will not heat up the room so much.

MyUmberSeal · 30/07/2024 14:05

This post cannot be legit, well ok it is, but it’s bonkers.
Your husband cooks himself some food in his kitchen and you’ve lost your shit with him. If I said that to my husband, he would tell me to stop being a bellend (and he would be correct). Come on now…give your hubby a break and go and get yourself an ice cream! It’s all good.

MistyMountainTop · 30/07/2024 14:05

MagneticSquirrel · 30/07/2024 13:42

It’s far too hot too open the windows if it’s 22C indoors, windows open only work when it’s cooler outside than inside.

If it’s 28C outdoors and now 26C indoors due to oven being on there is nothing anyone can do now, house is stuck at that temperature until it cools overnight. Fans just blow air around and opening windows will make it worse.

Using the oven during the middle of the day when it’s forecast to be 30C outside is unacceptable. Trying to keep a house cool
for self and pets is not controlling - it’s sensible!

I agree! DH and I exist on salads when the weather is like this, we have a mutual understanding not to use any ovens, especially as the kitchen is the coolest room in the house and we're living in there at the moment until sundown!

DuckyLuck · 30/07/2024 14:05

Are you just annoyed that he didn't cook lunch for you too?!

Is there really nowhere else the dogs can be, apart from the kitchen? Mine are heavy coated, they're doing just fine without any frozen towels ..

CautiousLurker · 30/07/2024 14:04

SharpOliveHam · 30/07/2024 13:35

Im doing everything in my power to keep the house cool. Not only for me but for dogs and he has just undone everything

Sorry but this is bonkers - I have two spaniels. Walked them very early to get their exercise in and wear the out. Have plenty of water out for them. Happily mooching around in doors or outside in the shrubs/shade, or napping on the tiled floor. If they look hot I spritz them with some water. And you could invest in one of the many reasonably priced portable air con/fans Amazon stock.

Your husband is absolutely entitled to cook a meal in the kitchen. Just open the windows and allow the air to circulate and it’ll cool down quick enough. That poor man.

Conniebygaslight · 30/07/2024 14:04

You are being controlling, unless you’re menopausal in which case LTB….🤪🤪

buttonsB4 · 30/07/2024 14:04

OP, you have a list of responses here all telling you that you ARE being unreasonable and you ARE being controlling, and rather than taking that feedback on board and going and apologising to your DH, you're arguing back.

We are all strangers, with no agenda, looking at your situation and all agreeing that you are the one in the wrong.

Part of growing up is learning to accept criticism, recognising that you're not always right and that living with people takes a lot of compromise, you can't always have things your way.

It really sounds like you still have some growing up to do.

heavenisaplaceonearth · 30/07/2024 14:04

  1. buy an airfryer, the whole oven for a single portion is ridiculous.

  2. dogs live in hot countries and survive. Create shade and buy them a paddling pool if necessary.

  3. 26 is barely warm but you could think about airconditioning if you are this sensitive to heat.

MagneticSquirrel · 30/07/2024 14:04

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Dunno why you think this is a wind up! Many people try to keep their homes cool for themselves and their pets with our windows and curtains closed to stop the heat getting in, as homes are so well insulated now that cooling down once the outside temperatures have dropped still takes hours even once it’s low teens outside.

Cooking when trying to keep house cool is ridiculous!

ChubSeedsYorkie · 30/07/2024 14:04

ClassicBBQ · 30/07/2024 14:03

Maybe if you calmed down a bit, you wouldn't be so hot and flustered.

😂

Survivingnotthriving24 · 30/07/2024 14:04

Your husband has the right to eat what he wants, when he wants regardless of you and the dogs being sensitive to heat. You chose to have dogs so unless there's a backstory of them being his dogs you didn't want and you now do all of the care, YABU.

ChubSeedsYorkie · 30/07/2024 14:04

I was expecting this to be about your husband using the oven and making it all greasy and horrible after you’d just cleaned it. You are of course being unreasonable! You aren’t the only one living in the house.

Celerylover · 30/07/2024 14:04

Wow. Imagine if you had an ACTUAL problem 😂

ClassicBBQ · 30/07/2024 14:03

Maybe if you calmed down a bit, you wouldn't be so hot and flustered.

JeremyFischer · 30/07/2024 14:03

I'm going against the grain here with a YANBU.

It's atrociously hot outside, and a disciplined and considerate approach should be taken to keeping the house cool, including opening/shutting windows at the right time, use of oven, use of tumble dryer, not hogging ice cubes etc.

Original poster
SharpOliveHam · 30/07/2024 14:02

Magnastorm · 30/07/2024 13:59

Running an oven for 40 minutes is not going to heat up a house by 4 degrees. That's just, y'know, physics.

Show quote history

The kitchen is now 26c according to hive. I checked at around 12 pm and it was nowhere near that.

I just went and touched range and it is scolding to the touch still. The kitchen was lovely and cool for the dogs and now it is the hottest room in the house.

OP posts:
Nosleepforthismum · 30/07/2024 14:02

Buy an aircon unit or an air cooler if you are that concerned about your dogs. We did for our spoilt, normal coated rescue who enjoys having it on while lying in the direct sun 🙄.

Sahara123 · 30/07/2024 14:02

You have paddling pools for your dogs but your husband can’t cook lunch oooookay!
Poor man . Perhaps if you stopped running round after dogs who are in all probability fine you wouldn’t get so hot .

Rickrolypoly · 30/07/2024 14:02

You need to chill TF out (pun intended)

LaughingElderberry · 30/07/2024 14:01

I still don't understand how 40 mins of oven use has heated up your entire house?

Original poster
SharpOliveHam · 30/07/2024 14:00

DavidBeckhamsrightfoot · 30/07/2024 13:59

How cruel of you to buy dogs unsuitable for the climate they live in.

Show quote history

I live in England. It is perfectly mild enough for my dogs except for a handful of days a year. And I do very well to keep them cool on unseasonably hot days.

They are both rescues. Don’t be ridiculous

OP posts:
CantDealwithChristmas · 30/07/2024 14:00

FetchezLaVache · 30/07/2024 13:38

Get him an air fryer and issue him with a list of the times he is allowed to use it.

Perhaps OP could also rig up some kind of tripwire system whereby an alarm goes off if her DH approaches the oven outside of the permitted timeframe. or even looks at the oven in a longing way.