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AIBU?

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Original poster

Controlling for being angry at DH using oven

832 replies

SharpOliveHam · 30/07/2024 13:32

Dh likes to eat healthily which means he never fries any food. Even the 1 cal spray is not acceptable. Fine.

But DH knows I’m very funny about the heat. Hate it and do very well to keep a cool house. I’m the person who goes around closing curtains, opening windows at the optimal time to keep things cool.

Just got off a work call to a sauna downstairs. DH has made himself a fry up (chicken sausages, egg, mushrooms, tomatoes). The kitchen is reading 26c - it was 22.5c when I looked at around 12 pm.

I told dh that this was really selfish behaviour. And now I’ve been called controlling.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Leafygreen84 · 30/07/2024 14:54

It’s not hot enough in the uk to freeze towels for your dogs and not use the oven. Get a grip. You’ve also been told almost unanimously that you are being unreasonable and refuse to accept it. What’s the point in this thread??

JudgeJ · 30/07/2024 14:54

SharpOliveHam · 30/07/2024 13:35

Im doing everything in my power to keep the house cool. Not only for me but for dogs and he has just undone everything

So the dogs matter more than he does to you? In MN parlance, he should LTB!

itsnotagameshow · 30/07/2024 14:54

SharpOliveHam · 30/07/2024 13:51

It’s not needless. I have double coated dogs.

Show quote history

To reassure you, double coats work to cool as well as keep the dog warm (my dog is double coated and I live in Spain so I can vouch for this being the case). Info here (ignore the bid about grooming) How to groom and care for double-coated dogs | PetsRadar

How to groom and care for double-coated dogs

Here’s everything you need to know about how to groom and care for double-coated dog breeds

https://www.petsradar.com/advice/groom-double-coated-dog-breeds

ShennyInfinity · 30/07/2024 14:53

SharpOliveHam · 30/07/2024 13:35

Im doing everything in my power to keep the house cool. Not only for me but for dogs and he has just undone everything

This is quite honestly absolutely ridiculous, he hasn't heated the whole house! Put a fan in the kitchen it will soon cool down. I bet he nearly choked on his freshly cooked breakfast!

BeaRF75 · 30/07/2024 14:53

Dear Lord, how selfish do you have to be to try to ban a competent adult from using the oven in their own home?
Maybe you need to stop making a fuss about such total trivia....
And it's not as if it's even going to heat any room apart from the kitchen.
What happened to compromise, OP?

Peronipony · 30/07/2024 14:53

I have the heaviest coated giant breed dogs known to man and they don’t need babied this much.

Let the man have a fry up!

Justcallmebebes · 30/07/2024 14:52

SharpOliveHam · 30/07/2024 13:39

I had a ham sad for lunch precisely so I didn’t heat up house.

Im the one running around throwing frozen cold towels on dogs.

Seriously? That's mad

BumpyaDaisyevna · 30/07/2024 14:50

Sorry - but YABU. You can't tell your DH when he can and can't cook just because you don't like it to feel hot in the kitchen.

Richard1985 · 30/07/2024 14:50

A rare thread on Mumsnet where the woman is in the wrong and you can only feel sorry for the poor fella who married her

blueberryforest · 30/07/2024 14:47

I would let the 'controlling' complaint roll off my back. So what? I might be a bit controlling about what goes on in my own home, but requesting someone not to use the oven at the hottest time of a hot day isn't the crime of the century.

For the future, I'd discuss ways to compromise. Needing to eat does not mean needing to heat an oven every time. There are smaller appliances that heat things without frying or using a full-size oven. There are also many things that can be made in advance or don't require baking or frying.

kiitoskiitos · 30/07/2024 14:47

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

PorridgeWobbler · 30/07/2024 14:47

SharpOliveHam · 30/07/2024 13:50

My poor dogs have thick, long coats that cannot be shaved. Double coated.

It’s selfish of you to keep such dogs in this climate. Far more selfish than cooking a few sausages.

Lacdulancelot · 30/07/2024 14:45

PistachioFrapp · 30/07/2024 13:37

You sound controlling and unhinged.

Open windows, buy a fan, keep kitchen door closed but windows open to funnel heat away from the rest of the house.

The man is entitled to eat in his own house ffs.

Opening windows when outside is warmer than inside make the house warmer.

LaMadameCholet · 30/07/2024 14:45

JeremyFischer · 30/07/2024 14:09

I agree - this is the real mystery to the story.

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Also, wouldn’t it then be an “Oven Up” ?

SoOriginal · 30/07/2024 14:44

If my DH tried to stop me cooking in my own home when I’m hungry then yes I’d think he was very controlling.
Why are your needs more important than his?

Catza · 30/07/2024 14:44

SharpOliveHam · 30/07/2024 13:51

It’s not needless. I have double coated dogs.

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So maybe learn a bit about them. Dog fur insulates both from the cold and the hot temperature. Double coated dogs are perfectly fine in hot weather. As above, my Alaskan Malamute is currently sleeping in a conservatory which is too hot for me to work in.

PollyWollyCrappy · 30/07/2024 14:42

Naughty husband. Should have had strawberries and cream instead.

AllstarFacilier · 30/07/2024 14:42

Having a salad so that your dogs don’t get too hot in England 😂😂😂 They’re not locked in the car, you sound unhinged.

Sirzy · 30/07/2024 14:42

it shows where your husband comes in household priorities. He can’t eat what he wants incase the dog gets a bit warm!

wheresthebigcarrot · 30/07/2024 14:42

Batshit.

PruneInTheNest · 30/07/2024 14:42

I think your extremely controlling and frankly it’s not that bloody hot- relax!

Magnastorm · 30/07/2024 14:41

Gettingbysomehow · 30/07/2024 14:39

I get extremely foul tempered when Im hot. I hste everyday of August. But luckily I live on my own. Id be pissed off at this sefishness too.
He needs a gas barbeque in the garden.

So this guy, rather than being able to ever cook in his own kitchen, needs to fire up the BBQ whenever he wants to make a sausage roll?

Absolutely batshit crazy 😆

Starlight1979 · 30/07/2024 14:41

CantDealwithChristmas · 30/07/2024 14:38

I know, but I'm double coated. So I can't get too overheated, otherwise this strange angry lady appears out of nowhere and pelts me with frozen towels.

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Hahahahaha 😂

My first thought when I read the OP was poor dogs. Just trying to chill out in the house and being whacked with rock hard frozen towels.

InternationalVelveteen · 30/07/2024 14:41

26 degrees? So what? That’s hardly sweltering. My house is currently about that temperature and no one has died of heatstroke yet. Including the dog.

You’re being unreasonable, controlling, and ridiculous.

KreedKafer · 30/07/2024 14:40

Bluebirdover · 30/07/2024 14:29

@SharpOliveHam what's for dinner tonight.....

Maybe a full roast?

@Bluebirdover Maybe a nice hot beef stew and dumplings, followed by steamed pudding and custard.