Have you ever dropped a friend?

Yep. No regrets.
I dropped a raging racist/homophobe/peadophile excuser (because she liked them, and too much time had passed, not right historical cases are allowed, why didn't victim/s complain at the time if its true.)
Their behaviour crept up. Ghosted.

Second was because it dawned on me during Covid that her lying was fucking outrageous (definitely didn't have cancer but shaved her head) Had words and blocked.

Third was not too long ago, after a bereavement. A 'friend ' called asking what had happened, knowing full well how devastating the death would be to me. They just wanted gossip 😡
I sent an angry message when that dawned on me. Then blocked.

Yes . 3 times

First after a falling out.

The second was gradual. They kept telling me what to do. Replies they'd post on my Facebook would upset other. I stopped being able to see them in person, then I restricted my Facebook, eventually I deleted and blocked.

The third turned out to be a complete fair weather friend . It was a time I really needed someone there for me . I did give them the a last chance, twice, then I decided I was better off without them.

Yes. It's a sad fact of adult life that you have to cultivate new friendships and cull old ones as people move away from one another in terms of values and activities.

In my early twenties when we bought a house our group of friends showed their true colours and what they really thought about us as a couple and where they thought our life was going to be . We just let go and walked in to the future . People do come and go and I think as you get older your friendship circle gets smaller and smaller . It's when good fortune and bad fortune comes your way you find out who your real friends are .

Yes years ago . Every visit to her made me miserable , she was just so negative about every single thing and the criticism of others was awful . I woke up to her being toxic and cut ties .

I haven't dropped anyone as such, but have let friendships fade out when lack of effort meant they were drifting anyway. I've been the dropped friend a couple of times. In one of those cases I wish the friend had talked to me, but it all became too late eventually.

I have , and with hindsight wish I had done it without ghosting.

People come and go, that's just life. It doesn't have to be a big dramatic affair, just leave the friendship to drift into nothing. These big statements are unnecessary.

You don't have to ghost people. I had a friend and I explained why I didn't want to be friends any more. (She was constantly 'negging' me and mean, we were only friends for about six months.) She wasn't happy but it was kinder than ghosting.

One was a lady I met at work-me working her a customer

I do hair on the side and she asked if I'd do hers

She would come round,sit on my sofa for hours,not listening to a word I said,just slagging people off-i was to just sit and nod in the right places (I know she slagged me off-id done nothing to deserve it)

The last straw was when she showed me up in front of my darling mil and I got so angry,I got her out and don't miss her

Another friend has been downgraded-im not ghosting her as such,but I'm not arranging to meet up with her,just keeping it to messaging

I'm a private person,I don't tell anyone my business unless I want them to know

It was a few years ago and I was going through a tough time in my relationship with dp-his dd was causing trouble for us and almost broke us up

She was the only person (apart from my son) who knew what was going on

She took it upon herself to tell everyone,our colleagues,friends,people I've never met and her mum all the juicy gossip as it unfolded with the words 'don't let on I've told you!'

I didn't have a clue until a good friend/my manager mentioned something I'd told my friend and he told me she'd been flapping her mouth for months

Still fuming but have half ghosted-unless I see her in the street,I will never see her in the flesh again and I tell her nothing,even though she still tried to dig for gossip

Yes, after I realised she was essentially coercively controlling me with her emotional reactions to control what I said and did. It was a huge relief to finally let go of the ‘friendship’.

Then dropped another developing friendship with someone who was showing the same personality traits.

Yes several times, when I have been taking advantage of, never dramatically, just let things fizzle out, stopped communicating, too busy to meet up etc, no regrets about any of the “friends” I have let go, as they weren’t really friends to begin with, but you live and learn.

A few times. He was desperate for a relationship with me despite having a girlfriend. He tried to convince me they weren't together. The way they talked on the phone suggested otherwise. He (and his friend who was just awful) blamed me for his friend getting sectioned. All I did was refuse to meet him (his friend) because he sent me hundreds of text messages. His time keeping was rubbish and he made us miss an event because he relied on his sat nav instead of his brain

And then there was the one who called me a shit friend because I didn't want to talk all the time

I dropped my best friend after finding out that she had been bad-mouthing not only me and my dp but also my two dc's.

I got an anonymous email to my work email from someone listing basically all the private things I'd told her and the fact that she'd then a) shared lots of sensitive private things with the anonymous emailer and b) taken the piss out of me and my physical failings; my dp's mental health and, worst of all, been really vile about my children.

I was devastated but the phone call I made telling her that I didn't want any more to do with her and why was horrible because it was clear from her response that what I'd been told was all true.

The anonymous emailer (as was, I was able to work out who it was through a couple of things in the message) did me a huge favour.

If I'm being honest I was upset about it for a year. But my children were at least not spending time with someone who thought so little of them and actually seemed to despise them. So it was worth it in the end.

I absolutely did drop a friend. One who had been a bully to me for years - but was full of “I love you” and “bestie” talk. She was, looking back, mean to me.
the last straw for me was when she gave my phone number to an old college friend of ours who was going to jail for being a PEDOPHILE, and told me he was In love with me and maybe I could talk to him and keep his spirits up while he was in prison.
she made excuses for a pedophile.
when said “he’s a pedo,” she said “no, it was just chile pornography.” And she has a child.

I asked her for an apology and asked her never to give my number out again. Then I realized that just wasn’t enough and I blocked her with no further explanation.

I’m so much happier without her constant me, me, me, Drama. She needed the center of attention, and needed me to be there so she could cut me down. Nope ! Wish it hadn’t taken so long, but I’m so glad I finally just cut her out of my life. I feel sorry for her poor child. :(

Yes several times

Yes

sometimes you grow apart or grow up

Not arsed what you read. I'd had a wine and felt like a cry so I wrote it for me not you

Yep I was fed up of being an emotional dumping ground for her. Told her I wanted some space for a bit because of various reasons, she was a Dick about it which gave me a wonderful, guilt-free way to step away entirely. Life is a lot lighter.

yes, two - sometimes you have to - one I’d known since late teens,
so 20 odd years and don’t miss her or her bullying at all

the other one, friends for 12 years, made a comment to a mutual friend
which then came back to me - I was incensed - in that one snide comment
was all her jealousy, snobbery, mean spiritedness leaving me no choice really -

Yes, a few times and no regrets.

One actually got back in touch after a few years. I met them for dinner, they were on the phone when I turned up on time and kept me waiting while they finished their conversation for at least ten minutes. Then they spent the entire evening talking about themselves and their current dilemma. Didn't once ask me anything about me. They were very suspicious when I asked questions to be polite so it wasn't even really a conversation. I just went along with it because I was kind of fascinated. The next day they messaged and asked me for a favour, then several more favours over the next few weeks. I didn't confront them, I just didn't help with the favours and they eventually got the hint/decided I wasn't useful to them. I wasn't hurt this time, I actually found it quite entertaining and it made me realise I was right the first time and to trust my judgement. The other people have been for similar reasons, self involved, only talk about themselves.

Yes, someone who was a good friend but who started wanting to spend every spare minute with me and gradually turned into a stalker. I was in my teens and moved with my parents without telling her where I was going. Within days she turned up - still don't know how she found out the new address. At that point I was so angry I think I was finally able to get through to her that I was done with her; I told her to get out and miraculously she left me alone after that. Looking back now it makes me sad because we started out as such good friends and had some great fun together, but I will never forget how I felt when she turned up at the new place.

Yes after many years of forgiveness….should have done it years ago! Feel free now.

I have. Give yourself time to grieve. Ending a good friendship is like ending a relationship

Yes. One. She was a newer friend met thru my 4 y.o DD. She was huge huge support to me during my divorce. So kind so compassionate so “there” for me. She goes on to reveal she is having an affair which is exactly why I was getting divorced which I actually overlooked thinking she was unhappy and would be leaving her marriage only to be told by her…oh I plan on going on like this for 18 yrs until her dd graduates from school. Then I was suspicious of and then confirmed by planting a false story she was talking with and befriending exDh. And she was. Inviting him to dinner etc all under the guise of supporting our DDs friendship. Another wise friend said…how many mutual friends have ended up on your exDH side?…none. There’s your answer drop her she isn’t trustworthy. She did reach out by phone but I didn’t take or return her calls. I could never trust someone violating my privacy by telling life details to my very abusive ex husband. Such a knife in the back. Never missed her. He did tho. He missed the information she was giving him